Does anyone dream of leaving NJ for good? (Fair Lawn, Washington: foreclosure, to rent)

[Ting ting]

I have been leaving NJ for twenty years. I want to finally try Southern California. When I was 20, it was to be a famous guitarist. Then I had children. When I was 30, to become a highway patrolman. Got hired, wife broke down last minute and wouldn't leave. Couldn't leave my kids behind. Was a reservist, deployed, came home three years ago. Immediately divorced Ms Unfaithful, my youngest of two is graduating high school. Both kids live with me and are game for the move. I'm 42 now, think im finally doing it. No need to post all the bad about SoCal. I know.
If you want or thought of leaving I would really like to know- where do you want to go? Is it really better somewhere else or have I just been in the same place to long?

[joe moving]

you have waited long enough.. go for it.

[annaegel]

We moved from Fair Lawn, NJ 6 years ago. We live in Tampa, FL. If I could, I would move back to NJ. My advise is to rent in California. If you own a home in NJ, consider renting it. At least you would have a house to come back to. You are always going to say to yourself, "I wish I had tried to live in California". You never know, you may like it. Don't make the mistake of comparing California to NJ, because it isn't. It depends on what it is your looking for. I find the people in Tampa pretty dumb, me first, bratty, etc kind of people. We do have things to enjoy like the nice beaches, marvelous winters, all kinds of outdoor activities, etc. I could sit here and dwell on the negatives, or choose to enjoy the positives, but I would still prefer to go back and suffer the winters in NJ.

Good luck! Hope you love living in California!

[Ting ting]

Wow I have never been to Tampa but that's quite a statement about rather suffering the winter in NJ. I have a brother in West Palm but I have only seen the swamps etc during military training. I've always been scared of Florida due to the foreclosure/job/economy things I hear are even worse than most other states. Not based on fact, just what I hear. I've considered looking into Florida more but for whatever reasons I'm drawn to CA.
Oops just remembered the summer humidity factor in Florida.

[nj21]

I've moved out of New Jersey twice, once to New Orleans & then once to Atlanta. I just moved back from Atlanta last month. I am always so anxious to leave that I never prepare fully to make such a move, or visit first.

Atlanta was over-hyped and New Orleans doesn't have enough jobs with decent pay. I'm a budding entrepreneur with no responsibilities, kids, and the only bill I pay is my student loan. So I am going to consider making a move by January 2012.

I say you should just go for it!! You have been thinking about it for so long. If your heart is telling you to go, just go! You won't regret it. If you have to move back (like I did) then that is fine. At least you are living your life the way you want to.

[joeymarine]

I've been to 37 different countries and lived in a handful of different states. For me....I had to come back. Will I stay forever, who knows....From my experience, the grass is never greener on the other side unless you decide to enjoy all the positives and not dwell on the negatives.

Why is it that we always remember the past better than it was, think the present is worse than it is, and the future is brighter somewhere else?

[todd72173]

Rent first for a few years. If you like it, buy! If not, consider other options. Atleast you should move out of NJ and go for it!

[Ting ting]

Oh yeah, I'm familiar with " The return ". I know a few who came back for one reason or another. A lot of stabs at Florida for some reason. A friend told me he came back once to a lot of folks remarks like "Thought you'd be back". He simply said " At least I tried". I happen to be from Hunterdon county and a lot of peeps in this area have a serious fish bowl view of the world.
I agree with you, live life like you want to (or close as you can get). No one will ever close up the NJ borders if I have to come back.

[Docendo discimus]

I've gotten the wanderlust and dreamed of leaving NJ. These are the places I've wanted to go:

1. Guam. I was born there but my family moved to NJ when I was only 3 months old (have lived in NJ ever since). I have no memories and very little knowledge of where I was born. I often wonder what it would be like to go back, and what it would be like to live on a tropical island. Growing up, my grandmother used to jokingly refer to me as "the Guamanian grandchild".

2. California. I can see the advantages of SoCal and the likes of LA, but I think I lean more towards a place like San Francisco and maybe even more northern areas. I don't know. I've never been to California/ Honestly, my vision of California is mostly formed from movies and people's vacation photos.

3. Maine. I used to have a big Maine fetish. When I was little, we went camping at Orchard Beach, drove to Bar Harbor and took a ferry to Nova Scotia, walked around Portland.

4. Seattle. Never been there either, but I've been told repeatedly by a couple of different people that I'm much more a Seattle person than a NJ person. I have NO IDEA what that means. If not Seattle, than a small town in Washington state...a small town like Twin Peaks.

5. Alaska. My father made me read a book about an eskimo girl when I was a kid. Ever since then, I've been curious about Alaska. When I was in high school, my grandparents randomly moved to Anchorage and I jumped at the chance to fly out there to visit them. I liked it...could picture myself living there. I forgot about Alaska for a while but a few years ago I read the novel Drop City by T.C. Boyle. That re-sparked my interest in Alaska.

6. Manhattan. I spent years working in different parts of Manhattan so I've logged a LOT of time there. However, that's not the same as LIVING there and I wonder sometimes what that experience would be like.

7. Seychelles. I can't think of anyplace more exotic than that. This one is just a pipe dream.

Having said all that, I don't think I could ever move to any of those locations for real, though. For me, NJ is home. HOME. And that's it. Is it perfect here? HELL NO. But it's home. Hobbits live in the shire, and I live in NJ. There's no explaining it. It just is.

Does NJ feel like HOME to you? It may very well not. If you have a gut feeling that California is HOME, why NOT go out there? I think you'll regret it if you don't.

[Ellwood]

Follow your dream...don't live your life on "should of, could of, would ofves."