need advice / help in jersey city (sublet, apartment, lease)

[dgraysn]

so... i've been renting the top floor 2 BR unit of a 2 family home from the owner, who lives downstairs, since March of 2001. i found out about the apt. from a friend and do not have a lease. i moved in with the understanding that i would eventually get a roommate, which i did in the fall of 2001. since that time i have had 2 other roommates. the understanding was always that they were renting from me and i was responsible for paying my landlord the rent.

I've always paid my rent on time and been a good tenant. My landlady is a senior citizen and in the past year or two seems to be "losing it" a bit. i'm curious what my rights are in this situation w/o a lease.

My current roommate is moving out at the end of august and i want my boyfriend to move in. as a courtesy i informed my landlord when paying the rent for august that "M is moving out and P will be moving in".

She decided sometime ago that she doesnt like P and first said he couldnt move in without her approval, THEN that he would need to supply her with references and now that she doesnt want him to move in OR even visit.
all of this has been conveyed to me with handwritten notes, which is starting to make me feel harrassed. i dont think she has any right to say who i can have as a roommate, much less, who can visit me!!

I have suspected all along that she might have an issue with me being gay, and possibly because P is 27 and i am 42 yrs old.

i need to resolve this soon and would appreciate any advice. I guess im starting to realize it would be best to move, but that will be a hardship not to mention the fact that having spent 7 years here what do i do for a reference for a new place?

[juliann1977]

i need to resolve this soon and would appreciate any advice. I guess im starting to realize it would be best to move, but that will be a hardship not to mention the fact that having spent 7 years here what do i do for a reference for a new place?

I think you've hit the nail on the head. I don't think I'd be too inclined, if I were you, to continue renting from someone who clearly disapproved of my lifestyle and continuously wrote passive-aggressive notes. The lack of lease documentation is problematic, I think, in terms of any recourse you might have. However, assuming your income and credit history are good, I can't imagine it would be at all difficult to get another apartment.

What about the boyfriend? Maybe you move in with him instead?

[dgraysn]

we want to live together and his sublet is ending at the end of august. thats why he was planning to move in with me.

im really concerned that i wont have a housing reference for the past 7 years now that my landlord has turned so hostile.