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Let me start by saying i was born and raised in Essex County, NJ...so i am NOT a transplant experiencing culture shock. I am 30 years old, recently married, and have lived here all my life. My wife and I are putting all of our resources into trying to leave the state within the next 2-5 years. We hate to be far away from family and friends but we are both so burnt out by life in the north jersey metro area.
So many people here are astonishingly rude, selfish, and ignorant. It is a rarity for anyone to hold a door for you, or let you get into traffic. If you do these things for other people, only expect about a 30-50% chance at best of getting a "thank you" or a courtesy wave back. Apparently the signs that say "yield for pedestrians" in parking lots are a foreign language to most people here.
Everyone is in a rush for nothing. Im no slow poke on the roads but being tailgated is still a frequent occurrence. The nanosecond that the traffic light turns green, some a-hole a few cars back has to lean on his horn. Reckless driving and road rage is endemic. If something holds up the line at a supermarket or the drugstore, people are ready to lose their minds. That fact that everything and everywhere is so crowded does help either.
I realize that there are a-holes in every part of the country, but the rate of them here is vastly higher.
The cost of living here is absolutely outrageous. Property taxes are obscene. Highest car insurance rates in the country. For alot of people (myself included) it is an epic struggle to maintain a middle class existence here.
To be fair, not all parts of NJ are this bad. Its mainly the northeast region of the state. And don't get me wrong, there are some pro's to living here. Ill admit we do have the best schools, doctors, hospitals, etc. and it is a very culturally rich area. But the negatives far outweigh the positives. Id gladly give up my access to NJ Diners, good Italian food, real pizza, and Taylor Ham to be able to have a comfortable middle class existence in another state, among civilized people with manners and common courtesy. I realize that i might make less money in another state for the same job, but what good is having more money when you are pissing it all away just to be able to live here. And some things are more important than money, such as peace of mind and not being constantly stressed out.
Judging by the fact that NJ has the highest ratio if any state in the U.S. of people fleeing the state compared to people moving in, its apparent I'm not the only one who feels this way. The States People Are Fleeing In 2013 - Forbes
With a little luck, within a few years my wife and i will be joining the exodus of middle class people fleeing the state.
So where are you looking to go? I want to get out of here too, but cannot decide where. Well we cannot agree on where. My wife would rather go south and I would rather go west.
So where are you looking to go? I want to get out of here too, but cannot decide where. Well we cannot agree on where. My wife would rather go south and I would rather go west.
Right now we are trying for Pennsylvania. Either Pike county (to be close to friends and family still in NJ) or somewhere in western PA (pittsburgh area burbs).
We love northern new england (Vermont, Maine, New Hampshire) but the winters would be too rough for us to deal with. The older i get the less tolerance I have for extreme cold...and their isn't much of a job market for my line of work up there anyway.
Also considering Virginia. Hesitant to consider anywhere farther south than Virginia as i am afraid of having some culture shock. True, my wife and i are looking for a slower pace lifestyle, but i don't know how well wed be able to fully acclimate to deep south culture.
Also thinking about Ohio. But personally my wife and i would want to be any further West due to distance from family and friends back here. We would like to be within a days drive (like 8 hours or less) from north NJ.
Last edited by TheDarkHorse; 01-05-2014 at 10:44 AM..
Man just come to South Jersey. You don't have to leave the state.
I do like South Jersey. My family originally has its roots in Cape May county. But i just want to make a clean break at this point. I mainly want relief from the financial burden of living in the state.
I do like South Jersey. My family originally has its roots in Cape May county. But i just want to make a clean break at this point. I mainly want relief from the financial burden of living in the state.
If you're having kids in the future, look before you leap. You'll find that you pay 1/5 the taxes elsewhere and then see that your kids will be lucky to get 8th grade NJ educations by the time they finish HS. We pay a lot but we get a top 3 education. I wish it was cheaper too but I'd never move down south while my kids are in school.
If you're having kids in the future, look before you leap. You'll find that you pay 1/5 the taxes elsewhere and then see that your kids will be lucky to get 8th grade NJ educations by the time they finish HS. We pay a lot but we get a top 3 education. I wish it was cheaper too but I'd never move down south while my kids are in school.
Good point...and something that will need to be taken into account. We do not have kids yet, but will be looking to start a family within a year or two. My ultimate goal is to be fully settled into a home in a new area by the time our prospective son or daughter would be reaching kindergarden age. (So probably 5-7 years from now.)
I obsessively research things before making a decision, and we will do our best to move somewhere with a quality school district.
Right now we are trying for Pennsylvania. Either Pike county (to be close to friends and family still in NJ) or somewhere in western PA (pittsburgh area burbs).
We love northern new england (Vermont, Maine, New Hampshire) but the winters would be too rough for us to deal with. The older i get the less tolerance I have for extreme cold...and their isn't much of a job market for my line of work up there anyway.
Also considering Virginia. Hesitant to consider anywhere farther south than Virginia as i am afraid of having some culture shock. True, my wife and i are looking for a slower pace lifestyle, but i don't know how well wed be able to fully acclimate to deep south culture.
Also thinking about Ohio. But personally my wife and i would want to be any further West due to distance from family and friends back here. We would like to be within a days drive (like 8 hours or less) from north NJ.
This is my exact dilemma. I have this fear of the deep south and culture shock down there. My wife has relatives who recently relocated to North Carolina and they love it there, but yeah I was thinking of areas like Pennsylvania (either Philly metro, Lehigh Valley or Pittsburgh Metro), Ohio or maybe even the west coast. Love California, but in the best areas it is as expensive as NJ.
And I am NOT going ANYWHERE further north!
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