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I've never come here just to bash on NJ and I've been lurking on this board for a long time now, but haven't spoken up until recently. I still have a real interest here because my entire family still live in places like Cherry Hill, Voorhees, Blackwood and Medford. My husband's family still live in Bayonne and Keyport. They are all looking for answers just like everyone else.
Most of my family live in Camden County and have you seen some of the property taxes in that county? All to support that hell hole called Camden. And I have no idea how my husband's family do it up north. My mother is worried now because money is getting tighter and tighter every year and she no longer has my father to lean on. She is a retired widow and can't "downsize" because she already has! I'm asking her to join us here in SC so that we can take care of her from here on in. What else do I do? Put her in a nursing home?
Some of my family ARE looking at other states now, my sister in law has left for West Palm Beach and some have decided to stay no matter what. They will decide what's best for their own families.
And the truth is, my immediate family and I would probably still be in NJ, complaining along with the rest of my family, if I hadn't gotten sick so young and had no choice but to make an extreme change in priorities.
Now my family and I are happy here, but I agree that there are some who have fled without doing enough research or who have never looked at any other issues other than financial ones and they are surprised that SC isn't like NJ. One poster actually said "I didn't realize along with the lower cost of living comes A LOWER PAYCHECK!".
Um, duh.
exactly!!! I fault no one who leaves..it's a personal choice but many do leave with out researching.
Sure the houses down south are cheap compared to up here as well as taxes, insurance, but if you need to work, for most, the paychecks are a lot smaller as well..it's all relative.
I can see for retiress who buy cash..no mortgage etc then sure the cost of living will be cheaper..but not for the average Joe who still needs to work.
I just found a chart that sums up the problem. As I've maintained, the problem is a national one, and everyone is ignoring the obvious, that of housing prices outstripping salaries. If you entered the real estate market prior to the end of the 1990s, you are SOL. I was (very) fortunate enough to buy my first home in 1998. Had I waited another 2 years, I'd still be renting.
I've never come here just to bash on NJ and I've been lurking on this board for a long time now, but haven't spoken up until recently. I still have a real interest here because my entire family still live in places like Cherry Hill, Voorhees, Blackwood and Medford. My husband's family still live in Bayonne and Keyport. They are all looking for answers just like everyone else.
I don't think anyone was talking about you - but you did come with guns a blazin' in your first post in this thread (as I did in my very first post on C-D if I remember correctly).
Anyway, to SWB's point about how can some us stand the constant NJ bashing in this forum - I agree with Kate, after awhile it turns into the Peanuts' teacher - "wah wah wah wah wah wah wah". Plus, there are several ex-Jersey residents who come on here and don't bash, but are very factual and unemotional about the pros and cons of living here, and don't feel the desire to bash everything about NJ to make themselves feel better about their new home(mike0421, i'm specifically looking at you!). I also think you can spot a disgruntled ex-resident a mile away and their posts are more humorous than anything.
I just found a chart that sums up the problem. As I've maintained, the problem is a national one, and everyone is ignoring the obvious, that of housing prices outstripping salaries. If you entered the real estate market prior to the end of the 1990s, you are SOL.
The chart:
Thats what happened to us. We bought our first house in 2000 - made a really good profit and bought a home built by husbands grandparents.......at market value of course, because we didnt want to see it not lived in by family, and then the taxes, the repairs...etc etc.......you know where this is going. We're going to take our time to weigh all of our options.
Besides the housing market though, there are some other big financial problems in this state. Unfortunately - that is going to take way more time then I believe I have to fix.
I don't think anyone was talking about you - but you did come with guns a blazin' in your first post in this thread (as I did in my very first post on C-D if I remember correctly).
LOL Yes, it's the first time I've spoken up here and I do believe I came in with all my guns a blazin'. Perhaps not the best way to introduce myself to the NJ board..
Like I said earlier, I've been lurking for a while and well, this thread really got me worked up.
There is an old adage that goes something like "You will attract more flies to your home with honey than with vinegar," and that most certainly applies here. I don't know if everyone is like me, but when I was considering leaving Scranton and researching other areas, I immediately ruled out areas with a lot of pessimism on their boards. Why? People who look at the glass half-empty at all times are more likely to become depressed and are statistically more likely to die younger. What does that mean for the good folks of those areas who WERE trying to make a difference? They lost the potential to have at least one energetic very young person who likes to tackle challenges (and God knows how many more besides myself). On the flip side, I was lured to areas where people were overwhelmingly praising their city---Pittsburgh, Minneapolis/St. Paul, and Seattle immediately came to mind. Optimists beget optimists; pessimists beget pessimists. Optimists beget success; pessimists beget failure.
If NJ wants to improve itself, it needs to lure in more folks who are upbeat and care to make a difference. Having a forum that is overwhelmingly saying "woe is us" repels this demographic. Having a forum that says "we're knocked down but not at all out for the count" DOES attract such folks. When someone inquires about Scranton I give them the HONEST truth---great architecture, affordable housing, proximity to two major cities, beautiful scenery, etc. AS WELL AS a high wage tax, rising property taxes, scarce white-collar opportunity, and too much racism/homophobia/prejudice for my tastes. I'm a realist. I know that even my own area faces its challenges, but I prefer to see the silver lining wherever possible. Where are these "silver lining" folks on the NJ forum? They're few and far between. Why?
SWB - We applaud your optimism - most of the time. But it's hard to be a Pollyanna when you're constantly stressed out. Face it, NJ may be number one or two in the financial rankings, but for many people who live here, they don't feel quite so wealthy. I think if they ranked states by stress, NJ would be number one. If it's hard to live on $100,000 in NJ, its harder to live on $25,000. I feel sorry for all of the elderly in NJ who are on fixed incomes. The girl that replaced me in my job lives with her grandmother. Her grandmother lives on SS, and gets about $11,000. How easy is it to live in NJ on $11,000? If my friend didn't live with her and help her pay her expenses, she'd have lost her little house in Union Township. She's 87 and has arthritis so dancing at "Satin Dolls" is out. It's hard to be cheery in those kind of circumstances!
If I won the lottery would I come back? At this point, I don't know. I've adapted to NC rather well and have many friends that I'd hate to leave. Everyone in my family still lives in NJ, so I'll always be interested in what goes on there. I find it amusing that so many transplants down here are on the NC forum, looking for the perfect school, perfect job, perfect pizza - they're busy trying to create a New,New Jersey and not always succeeding. And they do complain!
I think many people on the NJ forum as well as several other states are like that episode of the "Twilight Zone" where James Daly is being constantly nagged by his wife and boss, day and night, and when he falls asleep on the train keeps dreaming of that little perfect town of "Willoughby". It seems that many people are looking for just that town - stress-free where everybody knows each other and everybody is happy and carefree. Unfortunately that town doesn't exist in NJ CT PA CA or anywhere else. It's only to be found in your state of imagination!
SWB - We applaud your optimism - most of the time. But it's hard to be a Pollyanna when you're constantly stressed out. Face it, NJ may be number one or two in the financial rankings, but for many people who live here, they don't feel quite so wealthy. I think if they ranked states by stress, NJ would be number one. If it's hard to live on $100,000 in NJ, its harder to live on $25,000. I feel sorry for all of the elderly in NJ who are on fixed incomes. The girl that replaced me in my job lives with her grandmother. Her grandmother lives on SS, and gets about $11,000. How easy is it to live in NJ on $11,000? If my friend didn't live with her and help her pay her expenses, she'd have lost her little house in Union Township. She's 87 and has arthritis so dancing at "Satin Dolls" is out. It's hard to be cheery in those kind of circumstances!
If I won the lottery would I come back? At this point, I don't know. I've adapted to NC rather well and have many friends that I'd hate to leave. Everyone in my family still lives in NJ, so I'll always be interested in what goes on there. I find it amusing that so many transplants down here are on the NC forum, looking for the perfect school, perfect job, perfect pizza - they're busy trying to create a New,New Jersey and not always succeeding. And they do complain!
I think many people on the NJ forum as well as several other states are like that episode of the "Twilight Zone" where James Daly is being constantly nagged by his wife and boss, day and night, and when he falls asleep on the train keeps dreaming of that little perfect town of "Willoughby". It seems that many people are looking for just that town - stress-free where everybody knows each other and everybody is happy and carefree. Unfortunately that town doesn't exist in NJ CT PA CA or anywhere else. It's only to be found in your state of imagination!
And what a great episode it was. Since the Twilight Zone is my favorite show of all time, I will say 'A Stop At Willoughby' was probably my favorite episode, along with 'Walking Distance' and 'Number 12 Looks Just Like You', and 'The Obsolete Man'. Remember what state Gart Williams was commuting home from on the train? Connecticut! Through Fairfield County, actually.
There is an old adage that goes something like "You will attract more flies to your home with honey than with vinegar," and that most certainly applies here. I don't know if everyone is like me, but when I was considering leaving Scranton and researching other areas, I immediately ruled out areas with a lot of pessimism on their boards.
You ruled out areas to move to based on the feelings/attitudes of an isolated sampling of people that frequent the City-Data forums??? That sounds extremely short-sighted and probably resulted in you missing out on alot of excellent places to live.
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