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Old 10-02-2014, 10:38 PM
 
Location: Washington state
6,988 posts, read 4,848,051 times
Reputation: 21822

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Document this as if you were documenting a case for workplace harassment. Document everything. Date, time, and place. Don't ever say, "I think", or I thought". You SAW him do such and such. No equivocation. And document EVERYTHING! Every noise, every little freaking thing. If you have a list of credible things that he is bothering you with, they have to take you seriously.

Check what your state's stalking laws are. See if there is a group in your area that meets about stalkers. The police may not be able to do much. Remember, it's what you can prove that is going to be the defining issue. Often an independent group has more knowledge and can help you more than the police.

Don't do anything that could be construed as retaliation or is illegal in any sense of the word, hard as that may be. Go around to your other apartment dwellers and see if he has been harassing them too, or if they have seen him harassing you. Take a tape recorder along if they don't mind you making a tape.

As to the noise, go to your landlord and make a fuss about it. And document every time you have to do that if the landlord won't help you. Tell the landlord what is going on and mention that if this escalates into violence, previous unanswered complaints to that landlord are not going to look good for him. He may even share a part of the blame if something happens.

And don't hesitate to call the police for things like the knife. Getting friends over who can verify what is going on will help as well. Unfortunately, it's up to you to prove that this is happening. A restraining order may not do much good, but if he breaks it, and you can prove that, your neighbor may go to jail and that would give you a little relief.
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Old 10-03-2014, 12:23 AM
 
10,181 posts, read 10,231,246 times
Reputation: 9252
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanagloriana View Post
So he is still throwing a clear substance on my car. Im waiting for my court date. I called the court and they took my name and number and said they will get back to me. Im trying to find a camera to put in my car that records 24 7 no one has any suggestions. Its frustrating. Im going to make sure he pays for my windows front and back and my paint come hell or high water. It was suggested to me that he feels rejected and so hes doing this. I dont give a flying **** what he feels. Find someone to pay attention to you. We live nj not south beach.
One of the police officers that spoke to him said i wont have any problem convincing a judge that he did anything because he spoke with him for 10 mins and h said hes "a little off". If i have to move heshould have to pay for that too.

Any suggestions on a 24 7 recording, night vision camera?
You called "the court" and "the court" took your name and number and will get back to you?

On what planet?
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Old 10-03-2014, 02:54 AM
 
64 posts, read 94,025 times
Reputation: 100
Your neighbor sounds crazy. Ask your local cops what needs to happen for your neighbor to be taken in for a mandatory psych evaluation. Make sure you mention the knife incident and have the cops document his "homicidal ideation". With any luck, you can have him committed to a psych facility temporarily.

I would move if I was in your shoes.
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Old 10-03-2014, 05:21 AM
 
Location: NJ
23,441 posts, read 17,113,855 times
Reputation: 17471
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanagloriana View Post
So he is still throwing a clear substance on my car. Im waiting for my court date. I called the court and they took my name and number and said they will get back to me. Im trying to find a camera to put in my car that records 24 7 no one has any suggestions. Its frustrating. Im going to make sure he pays for my windows front and back and my paint come hell or high water. It was suggested to me that he feels rejected and so hes doing this. I dont give a flying **** what he feels. Find someone to pay attention to you. We live nj not south beach.
One of the police officers that spoke to him said i wont have any problem convincing a judge that he did anything because he spoke with him for 10 mins and h said hes "a little off". If i have to move heshould have to pay for that too.

Any suggestions on a 24 7 recording, night vision camera?
Amy sporting goods store has game trail cameras that run 24/7. See Cabellas, gander mountain, LLbean, Midsouth, Brownells, etc. Many models to chose from. Just the ticket.

Documentation wins every time...though that is a big hassle but worth it. Then again what do you think the court is going to ultimately do? Doubt they will make him move and a restraining order is useless under any conditons especially for a neighbor.

Anyone else being harassed by this guy? That would give more weight to your complaint.
Wonder if he has a record?
If would be very disturbing if you were the center of his life and he harassed no one else. Bring that issue to light as it might make the law think more clearly.
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Old 10-03-2014, 09:34 AM
 
16,715 posts, read 19,355,889 times
Reputation: 41482
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanagloriana View Post
So he is still throwing a clear substance on my car. Im waiting for my court date. I called the court and they took my name and number and said they will get back to me. Im trying to find a camera to put in my car that records 24 7 no one has any suggestions. Its frustrating. Im going to make sure he pays for my windows front and back and my paint come hell or high water. It was suggested to me that he feels rejected and so hes doing this. I dont give a flying **** what he feels. Find someone to pay attention to you. We live nj not south beach.
One of the police officers that spoke to him said i wont have any problem convincing a judge that he did anything because he spoke with him for 10 mins and h said hes "a little off". If i have to move heshould have to pay for that too.

Any suggestions on a 24 7 recording, night vision camera?
You can get a Trail Cam that uses batteries and an SD card on Walmart. We use them on our land for seeing where the deer are hanging out but it would work in this instance.
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Old 10-03-2014, 12:36 PM
 
86 posts, read 256,137 times
Reputation: 151
I read the thread and only once did I see anyone mentioning to call the landlord. Yes, call the police. But did you ever think to call the landlord? Do it and do it often!


Definitely call your landlord every single time something happens. Warn him/her that you will need to break your lease because you fear for your safety. Tell them the police have been involved.

If you are the one that has been paying your rent and being a good tenant, the landlord will clue in that this stalking mentally ill creep needs to be evicted for harassing other tenants[you] and messing with the personal property as well as threatening other tenants [you]. You might need to politely remind the landlord that if you move, the next tenant is likely to have the same issues with this crazy person and they will have a mess and a string of vacancies on their hands.

But in all seriousness? Just up and move. Then call the landlord and tell them you have vacated for fear of your safety. Do not tell them where you went. Tell nobody except those you trust. I would call a local women's shelter and ask for advice on how to move out without this creepy stalker ever finding out. They deal with this sort of thing on a regular basis.

No, it's not fair that you have to be the one to uproot, but would you rather be pissed off and annoyed than hurt/killed by this maniac? Think of your safety first, everything else is just not worth it.
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Old 10-03-2014, 02:01 PM
 
29 posts, read 35,172 times
Reputation: 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sawdustmaker View Post
You called "the court" and "the court" took your name and number and will get back to you?

On what planet?
I called the court and they hsve an administrator she was really nice. She did csll me back. This is small municipality its not nyc. I guess she had the time to do so.
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Old 10-03-2014, 02:13 PM
 
29 posts, read 35,172 times
Reputation: 45
Im looking into the trail cams. The dash cams with parking mode are 300 to 600 dollars.
I had to call the police on him today. He was banging and slamming doors again. The other day he was turning up his radio and turning it down. I get it... I might have to move. I want him to pay for damage done to my car. I overheard him telling the neighbors it was sap. On my front and back windows? Thats an amazing flying tree sap. Anyway. Im documenting.

I was told to go to an auto body shop and have them document what they think it is. My window is blurry. Sitting in the drivers seat its hard to see out of my window. Its been raining lately nso it seems like it worse. Like it spread due to me using my wipers. The cop came today and he cant see anything standing next to my car. So i have to explain which is fun

Its clear, i cant see through my windows at night and especially when its raining.
Cop: but its not raining now
No its not
Cop: i dont see anything. Maybe if you wash it it will come off.


Im getting the trail cam its just mounting it so he cant see it. The other thing is...he isnt standing over my car. He can stand feet away and spray this crap and this camera would mean nothing. I will just have a car with clear gunk on it. Im frustrated and I'm tired. I work 2 jobs and go to scjool full time (3 12hr shifts and 3 8hr shifts). IM ****ING TIRED.

Btw he said hes going to sue me for harrassment. So i have that going for me...which is nice

Last edited by vanagloriana; 10-03-2014 at 02:39 PM.. Reason: spelling
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Old 10-04-2014, 06:13 AM
 
Location: NJ
31,771 posts, read 40,580,083 times
Reputation: 24590
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanagloriana View Post
I was told to go to an auto body shop and have them document what they think it is. My window is blurry. Sitting in the drivers seat its hard to see out of my window.
I already told you what it is.

you think you can really get money out of this guy? I don't think you can win this battle.
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Old 10-05-2014, 09:35 AM
 
2,971 posts, read 3,404,580 times
Reputation: 4243
I feel so bad for you. I have a similar situation, and I would move, but I own my house and nothing is selling around here. I would also take a life-shattering (!)
financial loss on it if I did.

What is bad is that these folks are experts at turning things around to make you look like the wacko.

I never went to LE about my situation because, although I knew what was happening, I had no proof. I also felt it would make things worse.

If my neighbor hears me speaking with friends at my house, or anything similar, it sets her off and in the next day or two something will happen, and it will be very difficult for me to prove she did it.

Have you ever read The Sociopath Next Door? One of the creeps in that book is a "nice little old lady" who uses that crappy act to the max. These people are just amazing.

Just look at the way that cop treated you! Your nut neighbor knows exactly what he is doing, and has probably done it before.
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