The nasty posters can stop! I'm off this board! (apartments, to rent)

[Nancy Lynne]

Thanks to all of my fellow New Jerseyans who sent back such resentful, hostile responses to my post. Back off please! I shared my experience only

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from my experience. I didn't expect so many "resentful" responses. But for the record....

I have 2 children in child care - $1500 a month -- adopted!
I commuted for 15 years nearly 2 hours each way into NYC to make the kind of money I did. I am now an unexpected single parent. I have suffered some very serious medical issues over the last 5 years. I am 50 years old and I have worked very day of my life since I was 15. I'm no rocket scientist, I just worked my butt off -- and I mean over 12 hours a day for years. Oh...and for the comments about my heating bill ---- you;re right --- there was something wrong with my house --- it needed all new windows, etc. - but I couldnt afford to get them replaced.

And for the financial gurus on this site who also gave their "how could this be...advice....yeah....I was in the 40% tax bracket...so I didn't bring home as much as you thought and because I never worked for a company WITH PENSION PLANS...I always put the maximum I could into 401K plans.

Have a nice day my fellow NJ "friends". Don't bother responding - I won't be visiting again. No wonder NJ people have such a bad reputation throughout the country. Good Bye!

[RyanPKull]

Now Nancy,

I know your mad and upset, but don't take offense to what some people were saying. You have to understand that other people also have opinions, just like you have opinions about the state of NJ. Im sure they weren't trying to be mean about anything, I think they were just venting because what You said had angered them.

You really have to expect people to question why you are struggling when making 150k per year. I was sure there were other situations involved in your life, but you not mentioning them caused people to rebell and not understand. In all reality, half of your expenses has nothing to do with the state of NJ. Although, it's your option to choose how you spend your money.

When telling people "facts"..They have to be correct, you were expressing opinions through frustration. If you were advised correctly in the first place, someone would have talked you out of buying a 1+ million dollar home. A lot of upkeep and care is needed, unless you can afford to pay someone to do it. Now you feel as though your in the trenches because of some mistakes that you have made. I really do feel for your frustration and hope you stay here on this board to chat with us.

Regards,
Ryan P. Kull

[SteelCityRising]

Originally Posted by Nancy Lynne

Thanks to all of my fellow New Jerseyans who sent back such resentful, hostile responses to my post. Back off please! I shared my experience only

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

from my experience. I didn't expect so many "resentful" responses. But for the record....

I have 2 children in child care - $1500 a month -- adopted!
I commuted for 15 years nearly 2 hours each way into NYC to make the kind of money I did. I am now an unexpected single parent. I have suffered some very serious medical issues over the last 5 years. I am 50 years old and I have worked very day of my life since I was 15. I'm no rocket scientist, I just worked my butt off -- and I mean over 12 hours a day for years. Oh...and for the comments about my heating bill ---- you;re right --- there was something wrong with my house --- it needed all new windows, etc. - but I couldnt afford to get them replaced.

And for the financial gurus on this site who also gave their "how could this be...advice....yeah....I was in the 40% tax bracket...so I didn't bring home as much as you thought and because I never worked for a company WITH PENSION PLANS...I always put the maximum I could into 401K plans.

Have a nice day my fellow NJ "friends". Don't bother responding - I won't be visiting again. No wonder NJ people have such a bad reputation throughout the country. Good Bye!

For the record, not only am I not a "New Jersian", but I also was NOT attacking you in my reply! I was talking about the green-eyed monster, in general, and the negative consquences it can place upon families. Since much of North Jersey is just like one big suburb, I just assumed that the general populace there was similar to the "keeping up with the Jones's" populace here in the Scranton 'burbs. If people in North Jersey truly are the types who don't live in McMansions or drive luxury vehicles just to "feel confident", then I apologize. However, my friends in North Jersey, keep in mind that each time you stretch yourself beyond your means to make a purchase to "keep up", you're only hurting yourself even more in the long-run as you just contributed to NJ's cost-of-living increase!

The way you initially phrased your thread, I had very little sympathy, as I just assumed that $150,000 would be more than adequate to afford someone with a comfortable lifestyle; I had no idea that there were so many other struggles and hardships involved for you at the same time! Perhaps if you brought those issues to light instead of just basically the "housing" issue, you would have garnered more sympathy?

Good night, and I hope you reconsider your decision to leave this board! By the way, just because someone disagrees with your opinion doesn't mean that they are in any way being aggressive or unfriendly. For example, I'm notorious on the PA forums for my "anti-sprawl" rants, many of which fall on deaf ears as people immediately want to live in the exact same areas I just pointed out as being BAD, totally reversing the effect I was hoping my rants to have! LOL! I continually urge people to move into Scranton and Wilkes-Barre themselves to help to bring these cities back to life, and I'm often just laughed at, as people instead flock to the 'burbs. In this sense, we just have to "agree to disagree." I think urban sprawl hurts our downtowns while everyone else thinks it's the best thing since sliced bread!

[exhdo1]

My issue is she is in an unfortunate situation. She would have the ability to live in a less desireable area within 10 miles of where she is now. My biggest problem is like many others she has to throw in some parting shots at the state of NJ. If your complaining about a 2 hour ride to work thats a choice you made. You could live in Hudson County (not an affluent area) and be 40 minutes door to door. Home prices are far less there and with a little homework I'm sure you could find affordable and safe child care. But my biggest issue is when one needs to point out that they live in the same area with the more fortunate. In her case she needed to point out that she lives in the same town as Bruce Springsteen. What does that mean. Is it akin to looking down your nose at others. I don't know. Like I said in reply to her original post. I hope things work out well for her. If you decide to change your mind and read these replys, I wish you luck.

[Check123]

Looks like I'm late to the party. Anwyay...

See ya' Lynne.

Originally Posted by Nancy Lynne

Thanks to all of my fellow New Jerseyans who sent back such resentful, hostile responses to my post. Back off please! I shared my experience only

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

from my experience. I didn't expect so many "resentful" responses. But for the record....

I have 2 children in child care - $1500 a month -- adopted!
I commuted for 15 years nearly 2 hours each way into NYC to make the kind of money I did. I am now an unexpected single parent. I have suffered some very serious medical issues over the last 5 years. I am 50 years old and I have worked very day of my life since I was 15. I'm no rocket scientist, I just worked my butt off -- and I mean over 12 hours a day for years. Oh...and for the comments about my heating bill ---- you;re right --- there was something wrong with my house --- it needed all new windows, etc. - but I couldnt afford to get them replaced.

And for the financial gurus on this site who also gave their "how could this be...advice....yeah....I was in the 40% tax bracket...so I didn't bring home as much as you thought and because I never worked for a company WITH PENSION PLANS...I always put the maximum I could into 401K plans.

Have a nice day my fellow NJ "friends". Don't bother responding - I won't be visiting again. No wonder NJ people have such a bad reputation throughout the country. Good Bye!

[exhdo1]

Originally Posted by Check123

Looks like I'm late to the party. Anwyay...

See ya' Lynne.

I agree with you! By the way human nature dictates that she will be back to read the replys. Perhaps she won't respond but I think she'll take a peak. Like I've said many times before on this forum. If you can't afford a home there are apartments to rent in this state. Live within your means!

[Check123]

Hey! Are you implying that I live in New Jersey? Take that back.

Originally Posted by exhdo1

I agree with you! By the way human nature dictates that she will be back to read the replys. Perhaps she won't respond but I think she'll take a peak. Like I've said many times before on this forum. If you can't afford a home there are apartments to rent in this state. Live within your means!

[yclept]

Originally Posted by exhdo1

My issue is she is in an unfortunate situation. She would have the ability to live in a less desireable area within 10 miles of where she is now. My biggest problem is like many others she has to throw in some parting shots at the state of NJ. If your complaining about a 2 hour ride to work thats a choice you made. You could live in Hudson County (not an affluent area) and be 40 minutes door to door. Home prices are far less there and with a little homework I'm sure you could find affordable and safe child care. But my biggest issue is when one needs to point out that they live in the same area with the more fortunate. In her case she needed to point out that she lives in the same town as Bruce Springsteen. What does that mean. Is it akin to looking down your nose at others. I don't know. Like I said in reply to her original post. I hope things work out well for her. If you decide to change your mind and read these replys, I wish you luck.

I agree 100%. Nowhere in the original post did it mention stuff like big medical expenses, etc...that puts another light on it. But if you have that, you do need to adjust the rest of your lifestyle to accomodate for it. If, heaven forbid, one of us came down with a serious illness, we may just have to say, "We loved our time here; but we have to at least temporarily try something else" :-)

Regardless, this is a forum for exchanging ideas, opinions, etc. If one is going to join a forum, they better expect differing opinions on subjects. And, unfortunately, sometimes it can get personal..and hopefully that is squashed quickly.

[contracheck]

Wouldn't it be very humanitarian of everyone to just BACK OFF of NancyLynne ???? All she's really done is share some facts about her life ... perhaps in numbers others are not accustomed to and for that reason - she's been ganged up on ? I was a single mother and worked my "butt off" and my child grew up in daycare like Nancy described her's did ... HAVE A HEART PEOPLE and stop judging people by "numbers" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[NJMom]

Originally Posted by contracheck

Wouldn't it be very humanitarian of everyone to just BACK OFF of NancyLynne ???? All she's really done is share some facts about her life ... perhaps in numbers others are not accustomed to and for that reason - she's been ganged up on ? I was a single mother and worked my "butt off" and my child grew up in daycare like Nancy described her's did ... HAVE A HEART PEOPLE and stop judging people by "numbers" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Agreed!! Good luck, NancyLynne, and I am sorry that you received the responses you did. No wonder New Jerseyans have such a reputation for being rude and obnoxious!!!