Union County-based AA family looking for a way out of NJ entirely (Toms River: loan, home)
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[quote=jaymoney;44517213]I don't understand any of these words. Sports team. Constant grief for switching? Maybe it's because I grew up liking the Browns, but it's not like it's loyalty to family, it's a bunch of people who have agreed to wear the same shirt for a while.
Seinfeld is right, People are cheering for laundry. They need to not get so involved when the players don't.[/QUOTE]
Yes, and when someone says they switched teams, it implies they are actually on the team or work in management for the organization. It is very strange how people talk about sports teams. People who attend a New York Philharmonic concert don't say "Wow, WE really did great tonight". The orchestra did, all you did was buy a ticket. The sports team plays, all you do is buy a ticket and watch.
Here it's all hustle and bustle, russle and tussle..
In Westfield, New Jersey?
Maybe in a 1940s black and white old movie about working at a newspaper in Manhattan, but not in the suburbs of Westfield, NJ. People who live in Manhattan referred to places like Westfield as "the country".
OP is looking at NC from a college student/college town stand point. Most kids who like their schools also love that area, but it's not reality. You are in a college bubble in your school, presumably with people from many other states not just NC. How can you be so sure you love NC and that it's right for you and your ENTIRE family? I'm sorry, but you sound very selfish trying to uproot your entire family because YOU like North Carolina so much, from the experience of a college student there.
Yup!
A friend of mine's son went to college in a small Midwestern town and while there he said he couldn't believe how nice it was to be there. But he said this while being a college student. After college he took a job in that town. Within a year or so, he said he hated being there and left.
@soshana: spot on. Though I don't remember much about Harrison because we moved when I was 6.
@JG415: I don't have experience with OBX, but I have been to other beaches in NC and have preferred them to NJ beaches (even my favorite Pt. Pleasant). I haven't been to those NJ spots you mentioned, either. But the NJ.com FB page gives me a much different impression of how residents feel about NJ, lol. But yeah, the beach fees are absolutely ridiculous, especially when you already have to pay for parking.
I have already acknowledged that proximity to NYC is one of the things I missed most in my first year. But I'd gladly trade that for the simpler life in NC. Another argument is that if the best thing about living in a state is how close it is to a certain city, then it's probably time to rethink where we're living. Just a thought, of course.
Kinda surprised my mom is so eager to leave if/when she knows she can get benefits by staying longer!
@ECGuyz: why do you sound so Jerseycentric in your responses?? Lol.
Yes, the jobs pay more, but that doesn't mean that the COL and taxes aren't unsustainably high. Saying thay someone should stay up here just because the jobs pay more isn't really looking at it through wholesome glasses. It sounds like you're saying I should have stayed up here in this area for college. The COL wasn't a factor for me when I picked my school - academic/social fit and the value were the two biggest factors. Plus, I felt I needed to experience life outside only what I knew. I needed to leave NJ in order to really leave Westfield. Most of the schools to which I was accepted were in the Northeast, but I really wasn't a fan of the cold winters and I wanted to see more of what this country has to offer. Plus, I liked that I was gonna be the only one of my HS classmates at my college - a perk that I've truly enjoyed so far.
Have you actually lived in Westfield for more than a decade like I have? I'm surprised you don't understand my complaints about the younger residents. These were mostly people who were born in huge bubbles with silver spoons in their mouths. You can take advantage of the area without thinking that you're above people because of your parents' income. As I've said before, people here are rude and are ALWAYS in a hurry. They never stop to smell the roses. Life moves way too quickly here. A lot of people here are inundated with "Keeping up with the Jones'" syndrome.
It sounds like you'd tell my family to remain up here for good. With the greatest respect, just because you think NJ/NYC is the best place in the world, doesn't mean that everyone who lives here should stay forever. NYC is superb, but it isn't the center of the world. We've been here our whole lives and I think we should at least have the experience of living elsewhere. Just like you saying the grass isn't always greener elsewhere, I believe we shouldn't be restricted to living in only a single state just because of its proximity to one city.
Location: The place where the road & the sky collide
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rekaten
@soshana: spot on. Though I don't remember much about Harrison because we moved when I was 6.
@JG415: I don't have experience with OBX, but I have been to other beaches in NC and have preferred them to NJ beaches (even my favorite Pt. Pleasant). I haven't been to those NJ spots you mentioned, either. But the NJ.com FB page gives me a much different impression of how residents feel about NJ, lol. But yeah, the beach fees are absolutely ridiculous, especially when you already have to pay for parking.
I have already acknowledged that proximity to NYC is one of the things I missed most in my first year. But I'd gladly trade that for the simpler life in NC. Another argument is that if the best thing about living in a state is how close it is to a certain city, then it's probably time to rethink where we're living. Just a thought, of course.
Kinda surprised my mom is so eager to leave if/when she knows she can get benefits by staying longer!
@ECGuyz: why do you sound so Jerseycentric in your responses?? Lol.
Yes, the jobs pay more, but that doesn't mean that the COL and taxes aren't unsustainably high. Saying thay someone should stay up here just because the jobs pay more isn't really looking at it through wholesome glasses. It sounds like you're saying I should have stayed up here in this area for college. The COL wasn't a factor for me when I picked my school - academic/social fit and the value were the two biggest factors. Plus, I felt I needed to experience life outside only what I knew. I needed to leave NJ in order to really leave Westfield. Most of the schools to which I was accepted were in the Northeast, but I really wasn't a fan of the cold winters and I wanted to see more of what this country has to offer. Plus, I liked that I was gonna be the only one of my HS classmates at my college - a perk that I've truly enjoyed so far.
Have you actually lived in Westfield for more than a decade like I have? I'm surprised you don't understand my complaints about the younger residents. These were mostly people who were born in huge bubbles with silver spoons in their mouths. You can take advantage of the area without thinking that you're above people because of your parents' income. As I've said before, people here are rude and are ALWAYS in a hurry. They never stop to smell the roses. Life moves way too quickly here. A lot of people here are inundated with "Keeping up with the Jones'" syndrome.
It sounds like you'd tell my family to remain up here for good. With the greatest respect, just because you think NJ/NYC is the best place in the world, doesn't mean that everyone who lives here should stay forever. NYC is superb, but it isn't the center of the world. We've been here our whole lives and I think we should at least have the experience of living elsewhere. Just like you saying the grass isn't always greener elsewhere, I believe we shouldn't be restricted to living in only a single state just because of its proximity to one city.
ROFLMAO! You're worried about keeping up with the Joneses? It's alive & well in real life NC. Most of the jobs are in or near the 3 biggest metros which are crawling with refugees from North Jersey, NYC, & Long Island.
The UNC system is large & all schools are not created equal. UNC Chapel Hill is to the UNC system as Rutgers New Brunswick is in NJ.
ROFLMAO! You're worried about keeping up with the Joneses? It's alive & well in real life NC. Most of the jobs are in or near the 3 biggest metros which are crawling with refugees from North Jersey, NYC, & Long Island.
The UNC system is large & all schools are not created equal. UNC Chapel Hill is to the UNC system as Rutgers New Brunswick is in NJ.
I never said I was worried about keeping up with the Joneses by any means...but who said Northeastern transplants in NC don't eventually adapt? It seems as if you're trying to deter me/my family from moving to NC at all.
Yes, the UNC system is large with a wide variety of choices. And you are correct in that both UNC Chapel Hill and Rutgers New Brunswick are the flagships of their respective states, but I hope you're not comparing the academic qualities of the two flagships or overall state systems...because there truly is zero comparison.
I guess we are!! You left your working-class town around the same age, I'm assuming?
It wasn't a working class town per se, I would say it was a solid middle class town with some working class people as well. I was about 10.
My whole family is still nostalgic about the town by the way!
It wasn't a working class town per se, I would say it was a solid middle class town with some working class people as well. I was about 10.
My whole family is still nostalgic about the town by the way!
Ahh, I see! My family is the opposite - we prefer Westfield's beauty (and school district) to Harrison's gritty look.
Anyways, I just read an NJ.com article from last year that listed the most pertinent reasons why people leave the state. Reading the comments just adds on even more...oh dear. I'm really hoping the entire family can see why my mom and I want to leave so quickly. Because even though there is high logic behind staying so both my siblings can graduate, that's still four whole years away... At the very least, hopefully we can at least maybe leave Westfield, if not North Jersey altogether.
I'll try to talk to mom sometime this upcoming week/next weekend about it. How these initial talks turn out, in addition to our planned trip to NC in a month and a half, will definitely go a long way into determining the future of this family...hoping for a compromise, no matter what happens.
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At the very least, hopefully we can at least maybe leave Westfield, if not North Jersey altogether.
