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We have officially started our home search! Yes, it is as awful as I anticipated, although our realtor is great so far. He's being patient as we learn.
I am from Westchester my husband is from Queens, now we want opposite experiences.
-I have grown to love Queens since living there with him for the past 7 years & will miss the mix of city/suburb feel, diversity of people languages & food, walkable neighborhoods, proximity to Manhattan when desired but far enough removed to unplug when needed, etc.
-My husband wants to finally own a home with a nice big open living/entertainment space, to have a driveway & a backyard to host friends & out-of-town family members (one day in a post-COVID world...)
-We are young (late 20s early 30s) professionals with masters degrees, he works in finance & I work in healthcare (total annual salary near $150k & growing). Wanting to have kids in the next couple of years.
Our budget is probably no more than 650k with taxes around 15k give or take a couple thousand. We need either 4 bedrooms OR at least 3 bedrooms with a separate area for family to stay over. The biggest budget issue we have is that we need to be in/near a train town, as my husband's job is just a few blocks from Penn. We'd like to stay as close to 1hour door-to-desk as possible. I will likely be working in NJ so that's not a concern for me. Would also prefer to be near highways since my brother lives in Oakland & my parents are in Westchester, Manhattan, & other parts of Jersey.
I am quite liberal & cannot imagine living in a town where I will be surrounded by all white, right-wing folk. We are white ourselves but we are both children of Eastern European/Islamic immigrants. I am struck with a moral dilemma where I want my future kids to go to great schools as I did in Westchester, and I understand this most likely correlates to almost all white demographics, which ultimately I am fine with 80-90% white districts as long as they are not die-hard Trumpers. I almost wish we started looking in October to see the lawn signs, but the "blue lives matter" flags that are still waving are enough of a giveaway.
Does this place exist?! Here are towns that I have narrowed down so far: Glen Rock (my personal favorite given the lively town & train access, but obviously $$$), Fairlawn, Midland Park, Waldwick, Wyckoff, Allendale, and now my husband discovered Wayne where he thinks we can get more for our money. We can't go as far north as Ramsey (as much as I really liked it) bc the door-to-desk is nearly 2 hours. I considered Westwood/Hillsdale but it seems far from highways. What are our thoughts on Township of Washington? Places like Paramus are out too bc my husband thinks they're too busy, he is definitely looking for more of a neighborhood feel.
Gosh this is long. ANY advice is welcome on: little known train commute factoids (especially about parking situations at stations!?!?!), availability of community activities, openness to diversity & left-leaning views, safe areas with good schools. I saw so much info on these forums about things like how awful the PABT is, community feels where there are organized family activities, and flood zones in Wayne & Westwood, you guys know your stuff & have honest conversations which I truly appreciate!! PLEASE HELP
Last edited by worldlybutterfly; 01-25-2021 at 10:49 AM..
Reason: adding work info
We have officially started our home search! Yes, it is as awful as I anticipated, although our realtor is great so far. He's being patient as we learn.
I am from Westchester my husband is from Queens, now we want opposite experiences.
-I have grown to love Queens since living there with him for the past 7 years & will miss the mix of city/suburb feel, diversity of people languages & food, walkable neighborhoods, proximity to Manhattan when desired but far enough removed to unplug when needed, etc.
-My husband wants to finally own a home with a nice big open living/entertainment space, to have a driveway & a backyard to host friends & out-of-town family members (one day in a post-COVID world...)
-We are young (late 20s early 30s) professionals with masters degrees, he works in finance & I work in healthcare (total annual salary near $150k & growing). Wanting to have kids in the next couple of years.
Our budget is probably no more than 650k with taxes around 15k give or take a couple thousand. We need either 4 bedrooms OR at least 3 bedrooms with a separate area for family to stay over. The biggest budget issue we have is that we need to be in/near a train town, as my husband's job is just a few blocks from Penn. We'd like to stay as close to 1hour door-to-desk as possible. I will likely be working in NJ so that's not a concern for me. Would also prefer to be near highways since my brother lives in Oakland & my parents are in Westchester, Manhattan, & other parts of Jersey.
I am quite liberal & cannot imagine living in a town where I will be surrounded by all white, right-wing folk. We are white ourselves but we are both children of Eastern European/Islamic immigrants. I am struck with a moral dilemma where I want my future kids to go to great schools as I did in Westchester, and I understand this most likely correlates to almost all white demographics, which ultimately I am fine with 80-90% white districts as long as they are not die-hard Trumpers. I almost wish we started looking in October to see the lawn signs, but the "blue lives matter" flags that are still waving are enough of a giveaway.
Does this place exist?! Here are towns that I have narrowed down so far: Glen Rock (my personal favorite given the lively town & train access, but obviously $$$), Fairlawn, Midland Park, Waldwick, Wyckoff, Allendale, and now my husband discovered Wayne where he thinks we can get more for our money. We can't go as far north as Ramsey (as much as I really liked it) bc the door-to-desk is nearly 2 hours. I considered Westwood/Hillsdale but it seems far from highways. What are our thoughts on Township of Washington? Places like Paramus are out too bc my husband thinks they're too busy, he is definitely looking for more of a neighborhood feel.
Gosh this is long. ANY advice is welcome on: little known train commute factoids (especially about parking situations at stations!?!?!), availability of community activities, openness to diversity & left-leaning views, safe areas with good schools. I saw so much info on these forums about things like how awful the PABT is, community feels where there are organized family activities, and flood zones in Wayne & Westwood, you guys know your stuff & have honest conversations which I truly appreciate!! PLEASE HELP
I also lived in Queens for many years.
I don't think all or maybe even most of those towns have walking train access if that's what you want. If you want driving train access, different.
All those towns are pretty darn white. Wayne is probably the most out of all of those. But you know hey, you asked, so I answered. Fair Lawn has a large Jewish community and will be by my guess the most expensive.
Politics wise, honestly, there's not really too many righty strongholds in northern NJ. And a lot of the rightys are fiscally conservative but socially liberal. But this map might help.
If I were you I would look at Highland Park, Edison, Metuchen if you don't absolutely have to be up north. I think you'll get more for your $ and a little more diversity. More liberal.
Also, just so you know Bergen county retail is closed on Sundays.
I don't think all or maybe even most of those towns have walking train access if that's what you want. If you want driving train access, different.
All those towns are pretty darn white. Wayne is probably the most out of all of those. But you know hey, you asked, so I answered. Fair Lawn has a large Jewish community and will be by my guess the most expensive.
Politics wise, honestly, there's not really too many righty strongholds in northern NJ. And a lot of the rightys are fiscally conservative but socially liberal. But this map might help.
If I were you I would look at Highland Park, Edison, Metuchen if you don't absolutely have to be up north. I think you'll get more for your $ and a little more diversity. More liberal.
Also, just so you know Bergen county retail is closed on Sundays.
Fair Lawn is actually the cheapest of the towns mentioned overall, Allendale and Wyckoff are the most expensive. Although Radburn homes within walking distance to the FL train can be expensive.
All the towns mentioned also tend to lean conservative except for Fair Lawn, although some recent events in FL suggest even that town is swinging to the right a bit from its traditionally Democratic politics. Fair Lawn is for sure the most diverse of the towns mentioned, although it’s primarily a “White Diversity” (although the African-American and Latinx populations have grown in recent years.) Waldwick does have a larger than typical Bergen County suburb Latinx population, but they tend to primarily live in a neighborhood of a few blocks bordering the railroad tracks in older, smaller houses.
OP, if you’re willing to venture out of Bergen County, Edison, as mentioned might be a good choice, as well as Maplewood, South Orange, and Montclair.
Have you looked at Maplewood and South Orange? It's one of the most liberal suburban areas in NJ (or anywhere in the NYC metro, for that matter). I'd suggest Montclair but that would likely be out of your budget.
I think you'd find Essex county more to your liking than Bergen, based on what you're looking for. The trade offs are that the school districts will be slightly less "blue ribbon" and the taxes will be higher.
But, the commutes will be better and more direct, the housing stock is gorgeous, and it will be more diverse.
Fair Lawn is actually the cheapest of the towns mentioned overall, Allendale and Wyckoff are the most expensive. Although Radburn homes within walking distance to the FL train can be expensive.
All the towns mentioned also tend to lean conservative except for Fair Lawn, although some recent events in FL suggest even that town is swinging to the right a bit from its traditionally Democratic politics. Fair Lawn is for sure the most diverse of the towns mentioned, although it’s primarily a “White Diversity” (although the African-American and Latinx populations have grown in recent years.) Waldwick does have a larger than typical Bergen County suburb Latinx population, but they tend to primarily live in a neighborhood of a few blocks bordering the railroad tracks in older, smaller houses.
OP, if you’re willing to venture out of Bergen County, Edison, as mentioned might be a good choice, as well as Maplewood, South Orange, and Montclair.
I don't think all or maybe even most of those towns have walking train access if that's what you want. If you want driving train access, different.
All those towns are pretty darn white. Wayne is probably the most out of all of those. But you know hey, you asked, so I answered. Fair Lawn has a large Jewish community and will be by my guess the most expensive.
Politics wise, honestly, there's not really too many righty strongholds in northern NJ. And a lot of the rightys are fiscally conservative but socially liberal. But this map might help.
If I were you I would look at Highland Park, Edison, Metuchen if you don't absolutely have to be up north. I think you'll get more for your $ and a little more diversity. More liberal.
Also, just so you know Bergen county retail is closed on Sundays.
I second Metuchen. We are mostly white but we apologize for it.
I don't think all or maybe even most of those towns have walking train access if that's what you want. If you want driving train access, different.
If I were you I would look at Highland Park, Edison, Metuchen if you don't absolutely have to be up north. I think you'll get more for your $ and a little more diversity. More liberal.
I would really prefer to be up north given my family is in Bergen, Westchester, & Manhattan, but I will look into those towns mentioned. Also would like to be closest to rt 80 as we use that to travel west for out-of-state family. I am aware of Bergen Sundays. The map is helpful
Quote:
Originally Posted by zhelder
OP, if you’re willing to venture out of Bergen County, Edison, as mentioned might be a good choice, as well as Maplewood, South Orange, and Montclair.
I have thought about Montclair, but like the below quoted post said, it might be out of budget. Maplewood & South Orange I just learned about from another forum. Might be too far south (as I mentioned above), but I'll look into Essex. Thank you so much for the insight into the other towns mentioned.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dcb175
Have you looked at Maplewood and South Orange? It's one of the most liberal suburban areas in NJ (or anywhere in the NYC metro, for that matter). I'd suggest Montclair but that would likely be out of your budget.
I think you'd find Essex county more to your liking than Bergen, based on what you're looking for. The trade offs are that the school districts will be slightly less "blue ribbon" and the taxes will be higher.
But, the commutes will be better and more direct, the housing stock is gorgeous, and it will be more diverse.
Can you speak more to the commute? Specifically from the 3 towns you mentioned (Montclair, Maplewood, South Orange). I was trying to figure out the maps...it seems like on that train line you don’t have to transfer at all, is that true? Do the Bergen train lines have to all transfer at Secaucus? I also saw some transfers at Newark? I’m so confused!
I want to clarify that I do not need to be within walking distance of train, just as long as the commute is under 1hr30min door-to-desk including that initial driving distance & parking (ex: leave the house at 7:30 to drive to station, park, train lands in Penn a few minutes to 9, job is just a couple blocks from there). But I know nothing about the train stations & I feel like that's a whole 'nother research project in itself. I am thinking to make a separate thread just on that subject, to get an idea of which stations are more parking friendly, even for non-residents of that specific town.
PS Any thoughts on Hawthorne or Township of Washington?
Last edited by worldlybutterfly; 01-25-2021 at 06:42 PM..
Well you shouldn’t have a hard time fitting in most places. I mean you admit that your white but at least your like a cool ok type of white. Not just a bunch of racists like the rest of us white folk.
I don’t mean to sound obnoxious but I find myself a bit disillusioned after wiping my “Westchester is the best place ever” rose-colored glasses since living in Queens for a while now. All of my husband’s friends differ in cultural backgrounds & I find it extremely important in social learning. I frequently felt othered & at times ashamed of my culture growing up in an upper class white Jewish/Christian town, even being white myself I was still so different. I truly appreciate what Queens has shown me & how much I’ve learned from my husband’s friends. I’m wary of re-entering back into my own experience. Although of course I will do my best to teach within my home no matter where I end up.
I get it but your reference to being white but because it’s from an Eastern European immigrant background some how makes it ok is kind of pathetic. Why would you feel ashamed of growing up in an area that most people could only dream of. If you could afford a home in Armonk do you question your ability to raise honest caring children? I grew up in Queens it is an interesting place filled with interesting immigrants. They live in immigrant neighborhoods and when they do well they progress to place like Scarsdale so their children can have more.
Last edited by Nobubbleshere; 01-25-2021 at 06:39 PM..
I don’t mean to sound obnoxious but I find myself a bit disillusioned after wiping my “Westchester is the best place ever” rose-colored glasses since living in Queens for a while now. All of my husband’s friends differ in cultural backgrounds & I find it extremely important in social learning. I frequently felt othered & at times ashamed of my culture growing up in an upper class white Jewish/Christian town, even being white myself I was still so different. I truly appreciate what Queens has shown me & how much I’ve learned from my husband’s friends. I’m wary of re-entering back into my own experience. Although of course I will do my best to teach within my home no matter where I end up.
If that's really how you feel, then look at places like Elmwood Park or Lodi.
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Fair Lawn has a large Jewish community and will be by my guess the most expensive.
