U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New Jersey
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 12-05-2008, 10:04 AM
 
Location: Here but I spend time There.
1,972 posts, read 5,075,079 times
Reputation: 556

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobRiguez View Post
I dont know, Im kinda torn on the issue. When I was in highschool I would have LOVED to get it on with a couple of my teachers. Besides, isnt 16 age of consent in NJ?
As someone who went thru the experience during my Jr & Sr years in HS I must tell you that altought the sexual gratification as a young man was great, the emotional price was too hefty. Think about it yourself as an adult today, not as that horny 16 y/o, would you really want an adult to mess around w/ you as a minor? would you be ok if a teacher had sex let's say w/ your 15/16 y/o child?
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-05-2008, 10:12 AM
 
Location: High Bridge, NJ
3,858 posts, read 8,947,377 times
Reputation: 3349
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex07860 View Post
As someone who went thru the experience during my Jr & Sr years in HS I must tell you that altought the sexual gratification as a young man was great, the emotional price was too hefty. Think about it yourself as an adult today, not as that horny 16 y/o, would you really want an adult to mess around w/ you as a minor? would you be ok if a teacher had sex let's say w/ your 15/16 y/o child?
If the situation were revered and I were the father of a daughter in a situation with a teacher like this I'd be googling wood chippers and isolated areas of Wharton State Forest. However, just because it's female teacher and a male student doesn't mean its ok. ANY 35 year old woman messing around with teenage boys is clearly mentally unstable and possibly even dangerous-there's no way I'd ever want my children involved with a person like that. Lock her up and throw away the key.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 10:26 AM
 
Location: NJ
12,284 posts, read 33,113,789 times
Reputation: 5268
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobRiguez View Post
I dont know, Im kinda torn on the issue. When I was in highschool I would have LOVED to get it on with a couple of my teachers. Besides, isnt 16 age of consent in NJ?
any adult acting "in loco parentis" (teacher) the age is 18.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 10:37 AM
 
5,340 posts, read 13,022,228 times
Reputation: 1175
Quote:
Originally Posted by tahiti View Post
unfortunately, all too common - this happened to someone i went to school with - it's a strange story.
In my HS in Jersey City, this was commonplace. Even when I was in HS I knew it was messed up.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 10:39 AM
 
5,340 posts, read 13,022,228 times
Reputation: 1175
Quote:
Originally Posted by Badfish740 View Post
If the situation were revered and I were the father of a daughter in a situation with a teacher like this I'd be googling wood chippers and isolated areas of Wharton State Forest. However, just because it's female teacher and a male student doesn't mean its ok. ANY 35 year old woman messing around with teenage boys is clearly mentally unstable and possibly even dangerous-there's no way I'd ever want my children involved with a person like that. Lock her up and throw away the key.
Exactly - the double standard on this is absolutely absurd. It's wrong regardless, on so many levels.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 10:49 AM
 
Location: NJ
132 posts, read 598,143 times
Reputation: 43
The normal response is to cruxify the offending adult in these situations, be it a teacher, counselor, police officer, etc. However, the teenager also has a social responsibility in the matter of turning the other way. In today's society whether it be in classrooms or in the workplace, education and training on issues regarding drugs, ethics, sexual harrassment, and the like, are constantly emphasized to ensure people understand the issues and make the right decision.

Age and school aside, it is unfortunate that very often, these events happen when the people involved spend a lot time interacting together. Regardless of marital (or relationship) status, it happens in the workplace, frequent gatherings, and friends.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 11:08 AM
 
Location: Stewartsville, NJ
7,577 posts, read 21,046,804 times
Reputation: 1254
In my opinion.. Teacher to student relationships are and should always remain a sacred trust! One of my teacher pals has students even after they graduate sending her letters and emails trying to convince her to date them. Some well into their 20's now. She believes as I believe... never - even if they are at or over the age of consent!
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 11:15 AM
 
Location: High Bridge, NJ
3,858 posts, read 8,947,377 times
Reputation: 3349
Quote:
Originally Posted by ez2do4now View Post
The normal response is to cruxify the offending adult in these situations, be it a teacher, counselor, police officer, etc. However, the teenager also has a social responsibility in the matter of turning the other way. In today's society whether it be in classrooms or in the workplace, education and training on issues regarding drugs, ethics, sexual harrassment, and the like, are constantly emphasized to ensure people understand the issues and make the right decision.
I agree with you there as well. As angry as I would be at the adult, I would also be extremely disappointed in my teenager as well. However, you don't really know the situation-child molesters tend to be master manipulators. Maybe this woman "had something" on this kid and blackmailed him. Maybe she threatened to fail him-no one knows. Both parties may be at fault, but the one in position of authority and trust is clearly MORE at fault.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 11:24 AM
 
5,340 posts, read 13,022,228 times
Reputation: 1175
Quote:
Originally Posted by wileynj View Post
In my opinion.. Teacher to student relationships are and should always remain a sacred trust! One of my teacher pals has students even after they graduate sending her letters and emails trying to convince her to date them. Some well into their 20's now. She believes as I believe... never - even if they are at or over the age of consent!
Agreed.

I had a friend who taught in HS. She started at 22 and had a 19 yr old Senior who she used to run into in clubs and such. He always wanted a relationship - even AFTER graduation - and she was like NO WAY NO HOW.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-05-2008, 11:25 AM
 
5,340 posts, read 13,022,228 times
Reputation: 1175
Quote:
Originally Posted by Badfish740 View Post
I agree with you there as well. As angry as I would be at the adult, I would also be extremely disappointed in my teenager as well. However, you don't really know the situation-child molesters tend to be master manipulators. Maybe this woman "had something" on this kid and blackmailed him. Maybe she threatened to fail him-no one knows. Both parties may be at fault, but the one in position of authority and trust is clearly MORE at fault.
In 90% of cases it's absurd to "blame" the child involved. It's not "had something." It's they find the most emotionally scared, needy people to go for. They are, as you said, master manipulators.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:




Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New Jersey

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2021, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top