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marilyn, my heart and prayers go out to you, your mom and your family. just remember your mom is going to a better place and she'll be watching over you always. i know she must be very proud of you and all you've accomplished. i'm sure having you there is a major comfort to her. cherish these times together.
I'm sorry to hear about this difficult time. People can react in curious ways. Most people don't know how to handle grief and death, so they back away. I hope that you realize it's not a measure of their caring.
My first profession was as a trauma nurse. I saw a lot of death, and realized how sanitized our culture is from it. I also learned a lot about the process when I did private duty nursing of dying patients.
As your mother makes this transition (because we don't know what's on the other side of this life), I hope that you will tend her and talk with her with the most loving care. Trust yourself and your instincts, and bring beauty to her final days and your time together. Try to make it as much a cherishing of her life, and talk--if you can--about what she wants/needs. I often think of dying as a process of being born into another place. For example, the infant must think his world is coming to an end, but there is a painful movement to another world. In today's busy world, I think we can lose touch with the non-physical world of spirit, but that does not mean it's non-existent. Plenty of patients have talked with me about their experiences when we thought that they were not there, and they later returned to consciousness.
I also hope that you will be gentle with yourself, and take very good care of what you need during these days.
Very sad to hear about your situation. Be strong and just remember all of the good times you had with her and how lucky you are to have a mother you love soo much.
During this time you probably feel very much alone. Just remember that you are not alone. You have friends who are there if you reach out to them. They simply do not know what to say to you. What you really need is someone who will just listen.
No one can go through this period for you. It's a trip you have to make by yourself. Keep being strong. If you really need someone then reach out to the friend whom you think can give you what you need. Otherwise, take one day at a time.
I recently went through this and there is no way you can completely prepare for it. You just have to deal with it as it progresses. Shower your mother with love and attention and remember to be kind to yourself.
I'm sorry to hear about this difficult time. People can react in curious ways. Most people don't know how to handle grief and death, so they back away. I hope that you realize it's not a measure of their caring.
My first profession was as a trauma nurse. I saw a lot of death, and realized how sanitized our culture is from it. I also learned a lot about the process when I did private duty nursing of dying patients.
As your mother makes this transition (because we don't know what's on the other side of this life), I hope that you will tend her and talk with her with the most loving care. Trust yourself and your instincts, and bring beauty to her final days and your time together. Try to make it as much a cherishing of her life, and talk--if you can--about what she wants/needs. I often think of dying as a process of being born into another place. For example, the infant must think his world is coming to an end, but there is a painful movement to another world. In today's busy world, I think we can lose touch with the non-physical world of spirit, but that does not mean it's non-existent. Plenty of patients have talked with me about their experiences when we thought that they were not there, and they later returned to consciousness.
I also hope that you will be gentle with yourself, and take very good care of what you need during these days.
what an interesting post, especially the part about the non physical world of spirit. This brings me some joy, especially coming from a trauma nurse. You see I am or at times can be doubting simon peter, and I struggle with this. SO these words are very comforting. I want the miracle and God to hit me over the head and have trouble believing in anything after this world. Thanks for the glimmer of hope!!!
Now to address all of the warm wishes and prayers. Thanks alot, I mean this. Funny I really have accepting this, I am out of robot stage when I first found out. I have been dealing with it, and I was ready for this and back to the nursing home.
I have never lost anyone close to me, so this is a first for alot of new feelings. I do believe in heaven despite I have trouble at times but I need to believe in it. I have to deal now with my Dad who has spent over 50 years with MOM!! This is going to be the worst part, I need to make sure Dad can live happy. He is still healthy and will be alone! I feel bad now for Dad and I am going to see Mom today.
Thanks eveyone, you people are really special to me. I can be myself and say what I feel and act as crazy and still get the truth for you all!! This group has been very helpful to me. I do love you guy and gals. Marilyn
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Thinking of you and your family
