Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New York > New York City
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 06-28-2012, 01:38 PM
 
Location: NY,NY
2,896 posts, read 9,794,330 times
Reputation: 2074

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by bellakin123 View Post
You hit the nail on the head. I was just thinking the same thing. Why need a nanny if the wife isn't working? The OP said his wife "will try to" find a job for extra income. Unless a person NEEDS to work for income, there is no real need for a nanny.
Hey, don't tell a man what to do with his wife!

Your wife may serve as a cleaning woman and baby machine, his wife's purpose may be of a more 'delicate' focus.

Such women of 'purpose' in my experience REQUIRE domestic help and are well worth the expense!

Quote:
Originally Posted by bg7 View Post
I didn't even catch that - his wife is staying home and they still intend to employ someone??

I'd like to hire someone to open the fridge door in my kitchen and provide me with my selected items - but I just can't justify it.

Justify or afford, there is a difference.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-28-2012, 02:01 PM
 
11,597 posts, read 12,633,715 times
Reputation: 15730
There are some cultural differences regarding the domestic help that is causing some to show resentment. It the OP's family feels more comfortable with this type of arrangement, it is their choice. Flushng has a strong Asian population, but from different parts of Asia and different classes. OP is obviously from an educated upscale class. You can shop in Flushing without having to live there. There are also Asian and Chinese markets in the suburbs, but of course, not as many as in Flushing. Again, I do not know the age of the OP's children, but I think that an investigation of the appropriate age school has to be considered when deciding on location for an apartment or house. Even if you decided to send your child to a private school, you would not want to live too far away from that school. Also, private schools are popular in NYC because the public schools are not so good. In many of the suburbs, the public schools are on a par with private schools and most of the residents send their childre to the local public schools. In addtion to Westchester, you should investigate the neighboring areas of New Jersey and Long Island.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 02:25 PM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,844 posts, read 13,204,065 times
Reputation: 9247
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coney View Post
There are some cultural differences regarding the domestic help that is causing some to show resentment. It the OP's family feels more comfortable with this type of arrangement, it is their choice. Flushng has a strong Asian population, but from different parts of Asia and different classes. OP is obviously from an educated upscale class. You can shop in Flushing without having to live there. There are also Asian and Chinese markets in the suburbs, but of course, not as many as in Flushing. Again, I do not know the age of the OP's children, but I think that an investigation of the appropriate age school has to be considered when deciding on location for an apartment or house. Even if you decided to send your child to a private school, you would not want to live too far away from that school. Also, private schools are popular in NYC because the public schools are not so good. In many of the suburbs, the public schools are on a par with private schools and most of the residents send their childre to the local public schools. In addtion to Westchester, you should investigate the neighboring areas of New Jersey and Long Island.
I don't disagree (and certainly do not have resentment), but I guess my point was if he would like to have more of an upper class lifestyle, he may need to cut out expenses. If his wife is not working then imo, having a nanny doesn't seem necessary. My combined household income is slightly higher than his and I live a modest lifestyle. There are many, many things the OP will need to consider if he wants to live in Westchester or Queens. The taxes on LI vary greatly but also, just because taxes are high in a town doesn't necessarily mean it's a stellar school district. If Queens is an option, I would suggest anything in District 26, as that is probably the best one. Taxes are reasonable and close to the comforts that the OP is looking for.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 02:30 PM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,844 posts, read 13,204,065 times
Reputation: 9247
Quote:
Originally Posted by jcoltrane View Post
Hey, don't tell a man what to do with his wife!

Your wife may serve as a cleaning woman and baby machine, his wife's purpose may be of a more 'delicate' focus.

Such women of 'purpose' in my experience REQUIRE domestic help and are well worth the expense!




Justify or afford, there is a difference.
I suppose, but I always found that the "stay at home moms" who had nannies rarely participated in the upbringing. Many children were more attached to the nanny. Now if a woman gives birth to octuplets, she DESERVES a nanny! It's one thing to "want" certain things but the ability to "afford" them is another. I think that's an expense the OP could do without and the money can be used on something else.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 02:32 PM
bg7
 
7,694 posts, read 10,528,591 times
Reputation: 15298
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coney View Post
There are some cultural differences regarding the domestic help that is causing some to show resentment. It the OP's family feels more comfortable with this type of arrangement, it is their choice. Flushng has a strong Asian population, but from different parts of Asia and different classes. OP is obviously from an educated upscale class.

In many countries around the world you do not need to be either erudite or "upscale" (odd choice of word to describe a person rather than a bulding or neigborhood) to have full time help. In Asia for example, look at any family in Manila with one person working in a retail mall - that family can, and generally will, have domestic help for full time cooking and cleaning.

As for feeling comfortable, that is likely. But in some cases it is also a feeling of incapability. I've seen perfectly healthy and intelligent people brought up in such a dependency situation who are overwhelmed by the prospect of having to do it themselves. Some of them really cannot cook or run their house, and are frightened by the prospect. Usually, thrown in at the deep end however, people manage just fine.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 02:37 PM
 
1,110 posts, read 978,598 times
Reputation: 352
Quote:
Originally Posted by bellakin123 View Post
I suppose, but I always found that the "stay at home moms" who had nannies rarely participated in the upbringing. Many children were more attached to the nanny. Now if a woman gives birth to octuplets, she DESERVES a nanny! It's one thing to "want" certain things but the ability to "afford" them is another. I think that's an expense the OP could do without and the money can be used on something else.
Maybe having a nanny is rare in US, it is a norm in my home country, especially when you have a newly born child.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 02:41 PM
C8N
 
1,119 posts, read 3,217,515 times
Reputation: 778
Quote:
Originally Posted by gen2010 View Post
1000 for transportation, not just for a car. We need to buy metro card, or rail pass, parking permit in the train station if living in the suburb.
thats going to be a bit tough
since you will be newly licensed in NYS, you can expect your initial insurance to be around $300 a month
depending on what car you will either purchase or lease, and i am assuming you are looking for a luxury make around $50k? your car payment with some down payment would be conservatively $800-900 on a purchase and $500-$600 on a lease. now lets say you live in Long Island, lets say Bethpage which is a nice area, your LIRR monthly would probably be $254 a month and i have no idea how much they charge for parking. LIRR only gets to you Pen Station and if you need to take the subway to get to your final destination, that's an added $104.

Your transportation expense per month, you are looking at a minimum of $1158 per month and this is excluding parking at the LIRR station.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 03:00 PM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,844 posts, read 13,204,065 times
Reputation: 9247
Quote:
Originally Posted by gen2010 View Post
Maybe having a nanny is rare in US, it is a norm in my home country, especially when you have a newly born child.
That is true. Usually the wealthy do but the average people do not. At least none that I know of but some women will have a midwife for a few weeks. Some might have family help out the first few weeks or so but not usually a nanny. But everyone is different. All women react differently after having a baby. Some feel it's the most laboring experience and others have no problem getting back into things.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 03:23 PM
 
Location: NY,NY
2,896 posts, read 9,794,330 times
Reputation: 2074
Quote:
Originally Posted by C8N View Post
thats going to be a bit tough
since you will be newly licensed in NYS, you can expect your initial insurance to be around $300 a month
depending on what car you will either purchase or lease, and i am assuming you are looking for a luxury make around $50k? your car payment with some down payment would be conservatively $800-900 on a purchase and $500-$600 on a lease. now lets say you live in Long Island, lets say Bethpage which is a nice area, your LIRR monthly would probably be $254 a month and i have no idea how much they charge for parking. LIRR only gets to you Pen Station and if you need to take the subway to get to your final destination, that's an added $104.

Your transportation expense per month, you are looking at a minimum of $1158 per month and this is excluding parking at the LIRR station.
LOL!

"...some down...."

I suppose you mean $5 bucks! $800 to $900 on a $50K car with a wife and kid, on $95K income?

That's stupid! Get a cheaper car.

I plan on getting a bimmer in September. Depending on whether I go certified preowned, new, and/or which model, as well as insurance costs and options, I expect to put $10K to $20K down and may pay all cash.

$800 to $900 on $50K is just irresponsible unless one has everything else one needs, in which case wait a year or two and save upp; OR, one is living at home with no rent and no expenses, then one can be youthful and silly enjoying earning a salary.

Curious, just wondering how much interest you are paying on this hypthetical purchase, and what is the term?

Btw, the OP was budgeting for ALL transportation cost, including subway, railroad, taxi, et.ethical so, I imagine half that will go toward a vehicle.

Anyway, on less than $150K income, one's vehicle payment s/b less than $400 per month. If the car you want cost more then save your money for a larger down payment!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2012, 03:31 PM
C8N
 
1,119 posts, read 3,217,515 times
Reputation: 778
Quote:
Originally Posted by jcoltrane View Post
LOL!

"...some down...."

I suppose you mean $5 bucks! $800 to $900 on a $50K car with a wife and kid, on $95K income?

That's stupid! Get a cheaper car.

I plan on getting a bimmer in September. Depending on whether I go certified preowned, new, and/or which model, as well as insurance costs and options, I expect to put $10K to $20K down and may pay all cash.

$800 to $900 on $50K is just irresponsible unless one has everything else one needs, in which case wait a year or two and save upp; OR, one is living at home with no rent and no expenses, then one can be youthful and silly enjoying earning a salary.

Curious, just wondering how much interest you are paying on this hypthetical purchase, and what is the term?

Btw, the OP was budgeting for ALL transportation cost, including subway, railroad, taxi, et.ethical so, I imagine half that will go toward a vehicle.

Anyway, on less than $150K income, one's vehicle payment s/b less than $400 per month. If the car you want cost more then save your money for a larger down payment!
if you put down $5k on a $50k car and on 6%, not including taxes, monthly comes out to $869
i have no idea on how much the OP wanted to put down on a car
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:



Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > New York > New York City

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 03:31 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top