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Old 07-02-2013, 10:35 PM
 
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I very often wonder if NYC is a good place to be as a woman. There are many stereotypes about NYC nationally attracting all of the 'crazy' women from elsewhere. I think we have all heard the joke about how the city attracts the nutcases and bipolars of other areas. I thought it was a good place for the independent female, all kidding aside, to start a career more than anyplace else. Probably not so good for starting a family. Although, you are in a pool of alpha males.

You outnumber eligible men. You aren't limited to conventional norms even if you'd be an outlier elsewhere. By example, I mean you are not considered a social outlier if you are mid thirties and childless, never married. Overall, I still can't decide... is this city a good place for women or not? I'm starting to think it almost turns women into men, if that sounds strange.
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Old 07-02-2013, 11:06 PM
 
Location: Some Airport Transit Zone
2,774 posts, read 1,698,048 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EastBoundandDownChick View Post
is this city a good place for women or not?
I think it depends.
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Old 07-02-2013, 11:49 PM
 
Location: Bronx
16,217 posts, read 21,629,577 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EastBoundandDownChick View Post
I very often wonder if NYC is a good place to be as a woman. There are many stereotypes about NYC nationally attracting all of the 'crazy' women from elsewhere. I think we have all heard the joke about how the city attracts the nutcases and bipolars of other areas. I thought it was a good place for the independent female, all kidding aside, to start a career more than anyplace else. Probably not so good for starting a family. Although, you are in a pool of alpha males.

You outnumber eligible men. You aren't limited to conventional norms even if you'd be an outlier elsewhere. By example, I mean you are not considered a social outlier if you are mid thirties and childless, never married. Overall, I still can't decide... is this city a good place for women or not? I'm starting to think it almost turns women into men, if that sounds strange.
I'm not a woman but I can say is that there is a cheer amount of female transplants from else where compared to men. What I also noticed is that NYC does a great job attracting women from all over the country and even world for its diverse job market like media, fashion, arts, even law and medicine, health, and even domestic jobs. Anyone moving to NYC is crazy in my book, but hey you only live once right? As for the city attracting nut cases, I wont say nut cases but plenty of these women that move here are rejects of the Midwest and rejects of the South, typical careerist women who don't want to get married and settle down before the age of 25. As for NYC not good for starting a family, it is good if one you have a lot of money or two if you have a close family support system or structure which the locals have since majority of the time parents break up and its up to uncles, aunts and grandma to help raise their siblings kids while the parent works, play and looks for a new BF. As for a Transplant it will be difficult to that since no family is here and day care is expensive. I already know two educated white Transplant women who became single moms, one moved back to Ohio and the other is still struggling it out. In matter of fact 3, the third is a Florida Transplant struggling on welfare. And yes I have noticed careerist women turning or acting like men as of lately, but you gotta make the money right? Yes women out number eligible men however since the pickings are slim it makes women here more picky on who to enter a relationship with.
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Old 07-03-2013, 07:04 AM
 
2,727 posts, read 2,650,883 times
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I am a male, 31 and unmarried. I don't consider myself an outlier. If I wanted to settle down earlier, I would have. But from 25-30, I had every bit as much fun as I did in college, even while maintaining a career in banking. And that was a choice.
Sure NYC attracts its fair share of loonies. But go stand at broadway and prince street for a half hour, and try and tell me that new york also doesn't attract some of the most eligible females in the world. The amount of attractive, intelligent, and career driven women in this city is frightening. There are very few other places I would have rather spent my young adulthood (no where else in the US, maybe LA).
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Old 07-03-2013, 08:08 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles, CA
175 posts, read 334,257 times
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Yes, New York is one of the best cities to begin a professional career; the competition and potential career trajectory are unmatched virtually anywhere else.

Manhattan is not a place to raise a family unless you have more money than God.

NY is a great place professionally but personal relationships are difficult to cultivate.
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Old 07-03-2013, 09:50 AM
 
Location: Bronx
16,217 posts, read 21,629,577 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EastBoundandDownChick View Post
I very often wonder if NYC is a good place to be as a woman. There are many stereotypes about NYC nationally attracting all of the 'crazy' women from elsewhere. I think we have all heard the joke about how the city attracts the nutcases and bipolars of other areas. I thought it was a good place for the independent female, all kidding aside, to start a career more than anyplace else. Probably not so good for starting a family. Although, you are in a pool of alpha males.

You outnumber eligible men. You aren't limited to conventional norms even if you'd be an outlier elsewhere. By example, I mean you are not considered a social outlier if you are mid thirties and childless, never married. Overall, I still can't decide... is this city a good place for women or not? I'm starting to think it almost turns women into men, if that sounds strange.
What your people supposed to do is seek, find and obtain employment here and when the time is right go back home and seek employment out there. I already know a couple of Transplants who have done this, both were women and moved back home. Having NYC on their resumes helped them to obtain careers back in there respective native states, even got married and started a family back in there native states which is easier to do compared to NYC. Its easy to obtain a career in NYC but trying to get married and find a suitable mate to raise a family is a difficult one for women here to obtain that, example look at nearly all of the native women who are mainly single moms. Even though there are suitable guys around here many women especially careerist types do not find them domineering or not in their league , if not that than physically unattractive because the man is either short or too fat. But its a good place for women, depending on if she does not get jaded and starstruck to early. Hell I even had a woman in TX who told me she is moving to NYC to become bartender. I saw this womans future and wanted to smh.

Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 07-03-2013 at 10:31 AM..
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Old 07-03-2013, 09:51 AM
 
Location: West Harlem
6,885 posts, read 9,339,696 times
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What would "a good place for women" look like.

How do men "act." Do women who refuse the stupidity of passive aggression and narcissism "act like" men ?

I would also ask, which "women."
Because a transcendental category does not exist. It is a fiction, just like "black people" and "gay people" and ... you get the point.
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Old 07-03-2013, 10:19 AM
 
39,377 posts, read 39,465,153 times
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I think NYC is a difficult place for a single woman to find a mate. But otherwise, it is a great place for women professionally and culturally.
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Old 07-03-2013, 12:53 PM
 
13,904 posts, read 12,945,712 times
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I think NYC is a great place for women. None of that condescension you see elsewhere, none of the expectations that you always should be sweet, none of the expectations that you always should give way, none of the expectation that you should never dominate a situation.
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Old 07-03-2013, 01:30 PM
 
1,431 posts, read 2,471,938 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cida View Post
I think NYC is a great place for women. None of that condescension you see elsewhere, none of the expectations that you always should be sweet, none of the expectations that you always should give way, none of the expectation that you should never dominate a situation.
An ex told me almost this exact thing once.

It also seems to be expected, in the part of the country where I grew up, that women are married and pregnant by age 28. Grim.
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