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No it's not. We all want love, respect and acceptance. The basic cornerstones in a working relationship. But i just find it annyoing that some women are so fixated on a mans income.
A man's income is important because without a good position, one will be forced to reside in the worst areas of NYC. A 40K/year salary won't allow a man to do much, especially if he has bills (like significant student loan debt). Also, many women are in the workforce now, but at some point, after marriage, they may desire to take a break from working after having their first child. This will be nearly impossible, if the man doesn't earn enough to support the family on his sole income.
I have a very good friend who is currently a stay at home mom. I don't know her husband's exact income, but I'm guessing he makes around 150k/year. Although that's a great income, they live modestly in Brooklyn, but a week ago they purchased their first home in NJ. I saw pictures of it and it's absolutely beautiful. Juxtapose my friend's situation with a pregnant cashier who rang up my items at a grocery store. Although I didn't know the woman personally, I could tell that she was struggling. It looked as though she was due to give birth (within a week or so), yet she was still working!!! Also, when I looked at her hand, there was no wedding or engagement ring.
Again, I didn't know the woman personally, but I'm all too familiar with women who end up in "relationships" with guys who can not sustain a family. These are the women who often live in section 8 housing or bad neighborhoods and have a house full of children. Their children are zoned for the worst schools, and more likely to get involved with crime and repeat the cycle of poverty.
More negative B.S. In reality, black women who are interested in finding a suitable mate should NEVER take advice from the majority of black women and black men on forums. The majority of black women will advise to continue seeking a black guy (despite his background), while the majority of black guys will tell black women, no other race of men want you (because this ultimately benefits them). They are able to date whomever they wish, while black women are put on "standby--waiting." These types of thoughts continue to reinforce the perpetuation of single black women with out of wedlock children. No thank you. I see how a number of young black women (in the U.S.) live and I want no part of the dysfunction. If they had the answers, things would be much different for them.
I am my own woman and I'm looking forward to a series of dates lined up for Saturday and Sunday with men who fit my preferences.
Good for you! I would love to hear how it goes. I actually know a couple of people who found their spouses on Match.com. What does the screening process entail?
A man's income is important because without a good position, one will be forced to reside in the worst areas of NYC. A 40K/year salary won't allow a man to do much, especially if he has bills (like significant student loan debt). Also, many women are in the workforce now, but at some point, after marriage, they may desire to take a break from working after having their first child. This will be nearly impossible, if the man doesn't earn enough to support the family on his sole income.
I have a very good friend who is currently a stay at home mom. I don't know her husband's exact income, but I'm guessing he makes around 150k/year. Although that's a great income, they live modestly in Brooklyn, but a week ago they purchased their first home in NJ. I saw pictures of it and it's absolutely beautiful. Juxtapose my friend's situation with a pregnant cashier who rang up my items at a grocery store. Although I didn't know the woman personally, I could tell that she was struggling. It looked as though she was due to give birth (within a week or so), yet she was still working!!! Also, when I looked at her hand, there was no wedding or engagement ring.
Again, I didn't know the woman personally, but I'm all too familiar with women who end up in "relationships" with guys who can not sustain a family. These are the women who often live in section 8 housing or bad neighborhoods and have a house full of children. Their children are zoned for the worst schools, and more likely to get involved with crime and repeat the cycle of poverty.
Bolded shows that you don't know what you're talking about. I make a little above the 40K mark and I live in a decent-sized apartment (yeah, it's no house ) in a decent neighborhood. It's not Park-Slope or anything (Eastern Queens), but it's definitely no crime-ridden hellhole that you think we working class men can only afford. Rent and all of my other bills are paid on time. I also have a car. To put it into perspective, I work with a close friend who makes about the same...he has a wife, a baby, 3 cars (one is a 2011 BMW) and plenty of bills, yet, they too aren't struggling. Regardless of this, I still know all of that can be taken away as "life happens." You don't seem to grasp, and are ignoring, that simple fact. I genuinely wonder what you would do if your future husband hit rock-bottom.
Bolded shows that you don't know what you're talking about. I make a little above the 40K mark and I live in a decent-sized apartment (yeah, it's no house ) in a decent neighborhood. It's not Park-Slope or anything (Eastern Queens), but it's definitely no crime-ridden hellhole that you think we working class men can only afford. Rent and all of my other bills are paid on time. I also have a car. To put it into perspective, I work with a close friend who makes about the same...he has a wife, a baby, 3 cars (one is a 2011 BMW) and plenty of bills, yet, they too aren't struggling. Regardless of this, I still know all of that can be taken away as "life happens." You don't seem to grasp, and are ignoring, that simple fact. I genuinely wonder what you would do if your future husband hit rock-bottom.
I won't argue with you because perhaps you are able to live ok on a 40K-49K/year income, but that's not a good income for a man with a stay at home wife and children in NYC or the greater Tri-State Area for that matter. Children are expensive and NYC schools are crappy, if you do not reside in certain neighborhoods. I do not want my future children attending the worst schools in NYC or residing in a low income-working class neighborhood and that is my right. There are many women in NYC who do not care about such things, but I am not one of them.
Also, life is full of "what ifs." What if you married a pretty woman, but she got into a car accident and her face and body was destroyed? This could certainly happen but it doesn't stop you or anyone else from desiring attractive women, right.
I would never marry a man just based off of his income alone, because that would certainly become a very unhappy marriage. Things such as values/morals, love, spirituality, intelligence and compatibility all come into play as well. But my point is, I will not seek out those who do not have the same ambition and background as myself. And to answer your question, my future husband and I will have a disability and life insurance policy in place, in the event that something happens to either of us. Life is full of ups and downs. Sometimes we can reduce the impact of life's many challenges by attempting to at least prepare for the many curve balls thrown our way.
I won't argue with you because perhaps you are able to live ok on a 40K-49K/year income, but that's not a good income for a man with a stay at home wife and children in NYC or the greater Tri-State Area for that matter. Children are expensive and NYC schools are crappy, if you do not reside in certain neighborhoods. I do not want my future children attending the worst schools in NYC or residing in a low income-working class neighborhood and that is my right. There are many women in NYC who do not care about such things, but I am not one of them.
Also, life is full of "what ifs." What if you married a pretty woman, but she got into a car accident and her face and body was destroyed? This could certainly happen but it doesn't stop you or anyone else from desiring attractive women, right.
I would never marry a man just based off of his income alone, because that would certainly become a very unhappy marriage. Things such as values/morals, love, spirituality, intelligence and compatibility all come into play as well. But my point is, I will not seek out those who do not have the same ambition and background as myself. And to answer your question, my future husband and I will have a disability and life insurance policy in place, in the event that something happens to either of us. Life is full of ups and downs. Sometimes we can reduce the impact of life's many challenges by attempting to at least prepare for the many curve balls thrown our way.
I hope you know that their is no perfect man in NYC, there is no such thing as a soulmate, or better half. Its all about partnership. I asked advice from two men I know both have been married for 30 years, and both said both parties must be willing to be partners and compromise from good times and bad. And they admit if that both feel sorry for my generation and the idea of marriage. Me personally I want to move out of NYC if a woman birthed my child, seriously I would move to Yonkers. Also child care costs are very expensive in NYC, tahts the reason why Mayor elect Bill de Blasio wants to fund free pre k and expand after school education, at least give parents some breathing room.
I hope you know that their is no perfect man in NYC, there is no such thing as a soulmate, or better half. Its all about partnership. I asked advice from two men I know both have been married for 30 years, and both said both parties must be willing to be partners and compromise from good times and bad. And they admit if that both feel sorry for my generation and the idea of marriage. Me personally I want to move out of NYC if a woman birthed my child, seriously I would move to Yonkers. Also child care costs are very expensive in NYC, tahts the reason why Mayor elect Bill de Blasio wants to fund free pre k and expand after school education, at least give parents some breathing room.
One wouldn't need to fund separate child care cost, if the husband is able to afford for his wife to stay at home, during the child's first few years of life. It matters to me what my future child learns. I would never want to leave my child's early development in the hands of random day care workers.
I won't argue with you because perhaps you are able to live ok on a 40K-49K/year income, but that's not a good income for a man with a stay at home wife and children in NYC or the greater Tri-State Area for that matter. Children are expensive and NYC schools are crappy, if you do not reside in certain neighborhoods. I do not want my future children attending the worst schools in NYC or residing in a low income-working class neighborhood and that is my right. There are many women in NYC who do not care about such things, but I am not one of them.
Also, life is full of "what ifs." What if you married a pretty woman, but she got into a car accident and her face and body was destroyed? This could certainly happen but it doesn't stop you or anyone else from desiring attractive women, right.
I would never marry a man just based off of his income alone, because that would certainly become a very unhappy marriage. Things such as values/morals, love, spirituality, intelligence and compatibility all come into play as well. But my point is, I will not seek out those who do not have the same ambition and background as myself. And to answer your question, my future husband and I will have a disability and life insurance policy in place, in the event that something happens to either of us. Life is full of ups and downs. Sometimes we can reduce the impact of life's many challenges by attempting to at least prepare for the many curve balls thrown our way.
It's funny how in this day and age, some women at the end of the day still want to be taken care of (never mind that marriage is a partnership of equals and that staying at home, for a woman of any race, is a luxury these days.)
One wouldn't need to fund separate child care cost, if the husband is able to afford for his wife to stay at home, during the child's first few years of life. It matters to me what my future child learns. I would never want to leave my child's early development in the hands of random day care workers.
Nonsense. A child can do just as well having both parents working.
Why should I? Just go back and read it. It was addressed.
I do not find your response satisfactory.
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) in a decent neighborhood. It's not Park-Slope or anything (Eastern Queens), but it's definitely no crime-ridden hellhole that you think we working class men can only afford. Rent and all of my other bills are paid on time. I also have a car. To put it into perspective, I work with a close friend who makes about the same...he has a wife, a baby, 3 cars (one is a 2011 BMW) and plenty of bills, yet, they too aren't struggling. Regardless of this, I still know all of that can be taken away as "life happens." You don't seem to grasp, and are ignoring, that simple fact. I genuinely wonder what you would do if your future husband hit rock-bottom.
