Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Be careful and proceed with caution. I had an older "roommate" ( she was actually the apartment owner) situation. I would rather live with a young professional than someone older though I had a mixed experience living with an older person in Inwood... it eventually lead to me moving into my own studio in Queens afterwards for too many reasons that I'd rather not go into here. I did it for the same reason: the rent was very cheap for Manhattan (a red flag), her apartment was enormous and it seemed like a great deal. Do your research thoroughly on the immediate area: noise levels, talk to neighbors, visit the block on a Saturday night, etc... There are certain things which you might find out about the neighborhood after moving in that you wish you'd known before handing over your hard earned money.
For the roommate important things to remember:
Just because someone is sweet and seems nice during the initial meeting doesn't mean they will be sweet and nice after you move in, old or young. The might reveal their true colors after you move in. The same goes for cleanliness. Many people will clean up and tidy up (or worse if they have a roach problem douse the place in bug spray to temporarily keep them hidden while you stop by) right before you come by to view the place giving a false sense of how clean it actually is. After moving in the woman I rented the room from was a bit messier than what I would've liked but I managed.
It's her place and she might want things just a certain way or will be unwilling to share the entire apartment with you (ex: you can't use living room, their dishwasher if they have one, no guests allowed etc..) She might also have the mindset of "preferring" to rent out the room to young students since they're in class all day and won't be in the apartment very much. Plus they might not be aware of how much of their share of the rent they should be paying, like someone said she could be rent controlled.
Ask clear questions about what you can and can't use. Most people who've had a lot of roommates know someone listing too many things that are off limits to them is a red flag of being territorial of their apartment instead of sharing it. Be careful for that. It's hard to confront someone for hogging all the refrigerator space in their own home, especially when they're as old as your parents. They can also take advantage of this dynamic.
Noise levels outside. Is the neighborhood loud on weekends (parties, construction, etc..)? Does your bedroom window face the street? This drove me out of the neighborhood.
How many cats does she own? True, cats keep roaches in check if they're in the building but there are a lot of crazy cat lady types of Craigslist who are seeking "quiet" (while they blare the TV or radio of course) college students to pay for their retirement. As bad as this might sound there are people out there who prey upon naivety or 1st time renters of any age. I would seek out living with someone closer to my age looking back.
As is often the case on Craigslist there's a catch. Sometimes a few catches.
Oh that woman is probably only pays $500 max a month for the whole apartment. But if your ok paying what she is charging it doesn't really matter what she is paying. On living with an older roommate just draw very clear lines she's not your mother and you don't want her treating you that way.
Does it really make a difference what the older woman is paying? What should matter is what you are paying. We used to call this a roomer situation not a roommate situation. There is a difference. A roomer is someone that rents a room from the person that rents the apt. They are not on the lease, its only an arrangement between them. The roomer usually pays a lot more than the renter. The renter is usually an older person that pays less rent than what would be charged to a new renter.
The example one poster gave of renting to students that are not home much is a good example. Usually it was a room that is rented by a married man for the weekends. He would take his company to his room and they would have to leave with him. But no matter who rents in a roomer situation, no one wants to rent to a roomer that is home a lot. The idea is that the utilities are included so the renter wants to keep the cost down, since they are the ones paying the con ed bill.
Is this legal? If you are uncomfortable with it don't do it. It can however be beneficial to both parties.
I doubt that a 50 year old wants to be your mother. But no one that has lived at least 40 years is sweet. Polite, reserved, good mannered maybe, but not sweet. You can only survive a short time in this life being sweet.
Does it really make a difference what the older woman is paying?
Yeah, it really does.
If the apartment is rent stabilized, not unlikely:
If you are a rent-stabilized tenant, you are prohibited from charging a roommate more than a proportionate share of the rent. This means:
* If you have one roommate, the maximum you can charge that person is one-half of the rent—even if that roommate’s bedroom or living area is larger or more desirable, or if they have access to more of the apartment.
So, if Ancient Mary charges more than half her rent to her roomy, they can both wind up on the street.
And my guess is that Ancient Mary is paying far less than $2000. So look at Mary's lease renewal and determine if she is stabilized and what the rent is.
If you find someone your age, you can get an apartment 'together.' It can be yours. If you move in with an older roommate, you will be moving in as a guest in her home. You may not be able to appreciate the difference until you experience both, but there is certainly a difference.
Yeah, it really does.
If the apartment is rent stabilized, not unlikely:
If you are a rent-stabilized tenant, you are prohibited from charging a roommate more than a proportionate share of the rent. This means:
* If you have one roommate, the maximum you can charge that person is one-half of the rent—even if that roommate’s bedroom or living area is larger or more desirable, or if they have access to more of the apartment.
So, if Ancient Mary charges more than half her rent to her roomy, they can both wind up on the street.
And my guess is that Ancient Mary is paying far less than $2000. So look at Mary's lease renewal and determine if she is stabilized and what the rent is.
Come on Kefir King, are you a native NYer. I think you are, or you've been here a long time. You know how this game is played. Ancient Mary is not letting you see her lease. You want to play, you pay, and you can stay. If not run along someone else will. It's been going on for about a century or more in this town.
Ancient Mary will be wise enough not to play this game with someone that can't follow these basic rules. She is not going to end up on the street.
Come on Kefir King, are you a native NYer. I think you are, or you've been here a long time. You know how this game is played. Ancient Mary is not letting you see her lease. You want to play, you pay, and you can stay. If not run along someone else will. It's been going on for about a century or more in this town.
Ancient Mary will be wise enough not to play this game with someone that can't follow these basic rules. She is not going to end up on the street.
Her landlord, Ancient Guido, may be watching a lot closer than he was 50 years ago. He'd LOVE to be rid of Mary and is just looking for an excuse.
If you find someone your age, you can get an apartment 'together.' It can be yours. If you move in with an older roommate, you will be moving in as a guest in her home. You may not be able to appreciate the difference until you experience both, but there is certainly a difference.
In terms of price, it's a good deal. It's your first place; you won't live there forever. Check it out in person before handing over too much money.
Most likely, as someone else said, she's got a rent-stabilized place and makes a profit renting the spare room to you. I did this years ago, renting a room from a guy who described me as his niece. It was cheap. He was annoyingly old and offered annoying advice. But it was super cheap for the location (like your place) so I put up with it.
A benefit of your situation will be that, provided you don't give her thousands in a deposit, it'll be easy to walk away. So move in if it looks safe and clean. Start your new job. Then start saving to move. Ask around. Once you're here and meet people, and tell them your situation, you'll be surprised how many girls your age are looking for roommates. In my experience, 90% of people here got into their rental situation by word-of-mouth.
Who knows, there is no law that people of different ages cannot become friends.
I know it is anathema to someone who is 20 to realize that someone at 50 might, just MIGHT, know a little more than the kiddie.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
