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Some of what you described is what I notably see in the Bronx mostly through out Melrose, Fordham, South Bronx and areas like that (ghetto). Alot of my friends siblings have kids already, some of them have two and they're only like 18-20 years old. However, my friends are closer to my age and only some of them have kids. I'm sure there are some good women in this place, hell my ex was a good girl, but she's from Throgs Neck. I just graduated with my Bachelors degree so I'm trying to focus on getting some internships and job opportunities this summer. I'm hurt and hopeless, but I guess i have to accept things for the way they are.
I'm not sure of what bubble you live in, but what I described is all over the city and not just in the South Bronx. Go to parts of Brooklyn like Bushwick or ENY, maybe even South Brooklyn or uptown Manhattan like Washington Heights or Harlem, to even parts of Queens like Jamaica and these types of examples exist. Some of the women in the area turn good overtime but yet a decent man do not want that do to baggage from previous relationships. I was like you when I was 25 and received my bachelors degree. My advise to you is to don't think you have the world on your shoulders or in the palm of your hands. You need to think and sit a little but don't sit too long and time will pass you right by. Congrats on getting your degree, but most importantly try and build yourself up and worry about the ladies later. I would be more worried about jobs and money than worried about being with someone.
Being single feels really empty. I have friends, I have family, and it still feels empty. I know happiness comes from within but every time I try I eventually find myself back in a low place. It's hard to believe the world I live in today is so vain and selfish.
I hated it when people told me, "This is a good opportunity for you" after my break up. Like what kind of ****ing bull**** is that? This isn't good this is ****ing awful. But she (ex), probably had the same thing in mind as every other young adult in this god forsaken city. The evil consumed her too, and made her a vain witch looking for 'fun' and all that junk.
Why did you break up with your girlfriend? In this thread, it sounds like she broke up with you because the evil of NYC consumed her. But, in another thread, I'm Scared and upset, it sounds like she broke up with you because you were controlling and paranoid.
Again, it sounds like you are the problem. You state that everyone in NYC is just interested in one night stands which is not true. You state that everyone is NYC are sinful deviants except you. You have a holier than thou attitude which repulse a lot of women.
Let love find you. Join a few meet up groups. You are looking for a nice girl??? Go to places where people with other interests go...musuems, galleries, festivals. You have so many options. You may sit next to her on the "A" train, then BAM!
Why did you break up with your girlfriend? In this thread, it sounds like she broke up with you because the evil of NYC consumed her. But, in another thread, I'm Scared and upset, it sounds like she broke up with you because you were controlling and paranoid.
Again, it sounds like you are the problem. You state that everyone in NYC is just interested in one night stands which is not true. You state that everyone is NYC are sinful deviants except you. You have a holier than thou attitude which repulse a lot of women.
I'm just upset. Because I just don't know what to do. Everything around me just like bleak and ugly since my break-up. I continuously beat myself up over it. I'm only human I'm not perfect, but other don't see that in us. Instead they wait for the first wrong thing to happen so they can bail on you. It's hurtful and discouraging, and she someone I needed in my life. She was simple and laidback, not like most girls in NYC. However, our communication was pretty bad and we found ourselves mad at eachother. She wasn't passionate about stuff so it made intimate convos a little difficult to have with her. She wasn't the only problem, obviously I'm beating myself up for a reason.
Let love find you. Join a few meet up groups. You are looking for a nice girl??? Go to places where people with other interests go...musuems, galleries, festivals. You have so many options. You may sit next to her on the "A" train, then BAM!
If she was sitting next to me on the A train I probably wouldn't talk to her lol
I guess that's just what I have to try. Thanks.
you sound very scorned..that is not good and you are not ready for a relationship. You will just scare the woman off. Not trying to be rude, just honest. Youre also very judgmental..your not going to get anywhere with this energy.
When your vision is a little bleak you would feel a little scorned too. If you had to face the world and see that most of the people where you inhabit don't want the same things in life as you, it's not a pleasant feeling.
I'm just upset. Because I just don't know what to do. Everything around me just like bleak and ugly since my break-up. I continuously beat myself up over it. I'm only human I'm not perfect, but other don't see that in us. Instead they wait for the first wrong thing to happen so they can bail on you. It's hurtful and discouraging, and she someone I needed in my life. She was simple and laidback, not like most girls in NYC. However, our communication was pretty bad and we found ourselves mad at eachother. She wasn't passionate about stuff so it made intimate convos a little difficult to have with her. She wasn't the only problem, obviously I'm beating myself up for a reason.
"She was simple and laidback, not like most girls in NYC"
You obviously don't know "most" girls in NYC, so why past judgement? I've been reading this thread shaking my head and laughing for about a day. You aren't that much older than me, and even I see a problem. Like someone else suggested, you just got out of a breakup take this time to have fun. Spend time with friends & family, think about going back to school, something.
I have brothers a little older than you who've had kids at your age, and I can tell it's hell.
"She was simple and laidback, not like most girls in NYC"
You obviously don't know "most" girls in NYC, so why past judgement? I've been reading this thread shaking my head and laughing for about a day. You aren't that much older than me, and even I see a problem. Like someone else suggested, you just got out of a breakup take this time to have fun. Spend time with friends & family, think about going back to school, something.
I have brothers a little older than you who've had kids at your age, and I can tell it's hell.
I have friends who are in their 30s and are single because they can't find no one. I knew a guy that got so fed up with NYC women that he moved out to Florida. Dude basically moved because he was sick of not finding someone here. Both my parents have been divorced for more than 5 years and can't find anyone either. It's just awful. Sure my head is a little messed up right now, but I even see some fellow NYers in here tell me what I'm right.
If you can't find love in NYC, you probably can't find it anywhere. This place is literally a mecca of attractive single women looking to find a guy. Also, almost as a rule I find attractive girls with below average guys!
Now if you're holding out for a Victoria's Secret model or something, then maybe yes, you'll have to be the 6'5" dude with a 6 pack and a million bucks in the bank. But you don't sound like you'd be that vane so that can't be the problem...
Op you sound bitter, angry, and judgemental. If you go into dating with this attitude youll never find a woman who is attracted to you. Maybe some self discovery and reevaluation of principles is in order.
Nobody who has their **** together wants anything to do with a self pitying depressed loser. As long as you blame other people and shy away from the courage to look at yourself your life will not get better.
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