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Old 08-24-2018, 05:47 PM
 
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One thing that I would point out is that when evaluating a commute, you need to take distance into account, not just time. A subway ride from Brooklyn to Manhattan may take nearly an hour even though the distance is not that far. If something happens and the subway is not running, there are many options to get home. There are fewer options or the options are much more expensive if the 90 minute train ride to CT is not running. I don't think that happens very often but it's just something to think about. An hour ride on the NYC subway from one borough to the other is not the same thing as a one hour Metro North ride to some distant place.
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Old 08-24-2018, 06:41 PM
 
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Check out rumson/Middletown area of nj as the high speed ferry goes right downtown also many NYC families move to Montclair or ridge wood nj. If you are truly anti for your size family two floors of a townhouse should be sufficient. Look at ues/uws. The market is down a bit and you can prob get what you need for $3m or rent for starting around $12k. Both are very family friendly but are different.
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Old 08-24-2018, 06:50 PM
 
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Thank you, everyone, for your thoughtful comments and suggestions! I've been turning all of this over all day, and chatting with my husband, and now we are sort of leaning toward a trial run in the city. It would be disruptive for the kids, but it would be a great experience for them as well. Unmatchable and unforgettable, really. Seems like a waste not to take advantage of it. And who knows? Maybe we'll love it and stay for awhile.

So now here's my question: Where do most of the families live? I know they're in Brooklyn, but since we're doing this trial run in order to enjoy all that the City has to offer, we kinda just want to be right in it. Green space is very important to me, and of course we love Central Park, so UWS and UES are attractive. (I don't want to go much further north than that, because then the commute starts getting close to an hour.) I guess my number one concern is that we don't want to be despised by our neighbors. My children are very well-behaved. They aren't wild hooligans, they're aware of other people's comfort (because we're constantly reminding them), and they're pretty good at minding our directions. BUT we are still a large group, and as we've seen in this thread, that alone garners judgments and assumptions that are less than favorable. I don't want to feel like I'm living on top of and below and all around people who resent us for being who we are. Where are we most likely to find people who are tolerant of well-behaved children?

Oh, and my son is very involved in competitive gymnastics, so proximity to a gym with a good boys' team is a plus (if anyone randomly happens to know of one).
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Old 08-24-2018, 07:22 PM
 
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Uws, surburbs of NYC and bw riverside and Central Park. Tons of kids. Gyms check out Chelsea piers and elite. The ues has lots of kids but the feel is different. Higher buildings. it is also wider east to west than uws so You can get further from Central Park the avenues close to the park (5th and Madison) on the ues are old money blgs with stuffy coop boards which it sounds like you aren't into dealing with . Good luck!
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Old 08-24-2018, 07:30 PM
 
3,210 posts, read 4,591,977 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aspasia View Post
...what makes you stay instead of moving to Westchester or Connecticut?

I ask because my husband just accepted a job in the Financial District and we're trying to figure out where to live. We have four kids (11, 8, 6, and 4) and are coming from the Northern Virginia suburbs. We love NYC and I have always wanted to live there. I have fantasized about city-living for years, even with our family. I have a small-space living board on Pinterest where I daydream about simplifying and downsizing and letting the city be our yard.

BUT...now that we actually have this opportunity and I'm thinking through the logistics of daily life, I'm not so sure. Maybe my fantasy was just that? A fantasy. When I started looking in Connecticut, everything made more sense.

The problem is my husband's commute. We've pretty much accepted that with his job, we will always face this tension between short commute/small living space vs. long commute/comfortable living space. We've been doing the long commute thing for several years now and we've gotten fairly used to it (it helps that he works from home a couple days a week, which he'll be able to do in NYC as well). But I know it's hard on him and a shorter commute would be life changing. I'm just trying to figure out if that can work for the rest of us.

Basically, I know all the arguments for staying in the suburbs and maintaining my soccer mom/minivan life (not least of which is that my kids are used to it). But for those larger families that live in the city, what makes you stay? Do you ever think about leaving?
As long as you have the school situation figured out, raising kids in the city is one of the most rewarding experiences I think one can have. The diversity, culture and stimulation helps kids to break out from the bubble that so many people seemed to surround themselves in, helping in making them into more fully rounded and capable adults.
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Old 08-24-2018, 07:34 PM
 
3,210 posts, read 4,591,977 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aspasia View Post
Thank you, everyone, for your thoughtful comments and suggestions! I've been turning all of this over all day, and chatting with my husband, and now we are sort of leaning toward a trial run in the city. It would be disruptive for the kids, but it would be a great experience for them as well. Unmatchable and unforgettable, really. Seems like a waste not to take advantage of it. And who knows? Maybe we'll love it and stay for awhile.

So now here's my question: Where do most of the families live? I know they're in Brooklyn, but since we're doing this trial run in order to enjoy all that the City has to offer, we kinda just want to be right in it. Green space is very important to me, and of course we love Central Park, so UWS and UES are attractive. (I don't want to go much further north than that, because then the commute starts getting close to an hour.) I guess my number one concern is that we don't want to be despised by our neighbors. My children are very well-behaved. They aren't wild hooligans, they're aware of other people's comfort (because we're constantly reminding them), and they're pretty good at minding our directions. BUT we are still a large group, and as we've seen in this thread, that alone garners judgments and assumptions that are less than favorable. I don't want to feel like I'm living on top of and below and all around people who resent us for being who we are. Where are we most likely to find people who are tolerant of well-behaved children?

Oh, and my son is very involved in competitive gymnastics, so proximity to a gym with a good boys' team is a plus (if anyone randomly happens to know of one).
Queens is another great option. Astoria, Sunnyside and Forest Hills are incredible family friendly neighborhoods with larger home size options. My neighborhood of Jackson Heights is another one high on the list of families! I am so glad you've chosen to come here to NY and give your children that kind of experience.
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Old 08-24-2018, 07:36 PM
 
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Oo and families love TriBeCa however clearly not by Central Park and higher prices than ues/uws
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Old 08-24-2018, 08:24 PM
 
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I second Forest Hills. OP might actually be able to rent a beautiful, large home in Forest Hills Gardens and literally be in the thick of Manhattan in under 20 minutes. OP, if you want space but ALSO want to be in the city and ALSO want green space, consider Forest Hills!!! You'll thank us.

Queens is far more diverse and dare I say it, far more interesting than Manhattan anyway.
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Old 08-24-2018, 08:26 PM
 
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OP could rent something like this: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1...32005262_zpid/

It would be fabulous for her family.
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Old 08-24-2018, 08:27 PM
 
31,588 posts, read 26,430,119 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shadypinesma View Post
I second Forest Hills. OP might actually be able to rent a beautiful, large home in Forest Hills Gardens and literally be in the thick of Manhattan in under 20 minutes. OP, if you want space but ALSO want to be in the city and ALSO want green space, consider Forest Hills!!! You'll thank us.

Queens is far more diverse and dare I say it, far more interesting than Manhattan anyway.


She'll thank *you*.


See what I did there?
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