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Old 01-18-2008, 01:38 AM
 
Location: Sound Beach
2,160 posts, read 7,490,129 times
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They learned how to whine on Long Island...and then moved upstate :-)

 
Old 01-18-2008, 07:51 AM
 
2,473 posts, read 5,427,640 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SWB View Post
One thing I've noticed about not only the Upstate NY forum but also the PA, NJ, OH, and MI forums is that there is a plethora of members who do nothing but whine and complain month in and month out about how "awful" their states are, how much they hate their lives, how corrupt the government is, yada, yada, yada, but instead of relocating to an area that suits their interests more viably they derive pleasure seemingly from bashing their states mercilessly. Why?
On the NY, Pa & Fla forums I also have noticed SO many unhappy people that ***** & moan & give constant negativity to the threads.

I'm a pretty up-beat happy person, & when I'd post a positive, funny or joking type post, the replies would be so negative it gave me agida (sp?) & I swore I'd never reply again!! Yet I always come back for more...

One reason I personally think these folks are so negative is the "greener grass" theory: "oh...life's gonna be SO much better when we move to *fill in the blank*".
Truthfully through experience, the grass AINT no greener!! It's just a different SHADE of green!!!

When the new "area" comes up short of expectations & reality (and it's inherent problems) rears it's ugly head, folks can get bitter & resentful.

It's like anything in life nowadays...we build up a "perfect fantasy" in our minds of a place (or home, car, job, state, town, relationship, etc.) & when in reality it doesn't live up to our "perfect expectations" we get disillusioned & bitter. (hmmm...could this have anything to do with the high divorce rate??)

Having grown up p/t in Manhattan & p/t in upstate NY I cite my own example: I compare the 2 places now & back then & ALWAYS come up short on the "now". I guess it's a personal type of bigotry or stick-in-the-muddiness on my part...(uses best "old person's voice")"you young whippersnappers...life was SO much better years ago!!!"....

I remember when I was a kid Manhattan closing down on Sundays where the only things open were the churches, bakeries & newspaper stands. I remember 1/4 the amount of people & a "slower" pace. I remember folks caring about neighbors & others. When I visit now it's TOTALLY opposite & I get "bitter" over the change. All the old haunts are gone.

I remember upstate NY driving 10 miles to the (1) grocery store. Lots of trees & wildlife. No homes for miles around us. Again, pleasant people caring about neighbors & others. Before I moved to Fla in '99, I was ringed round with McMansions & SUVers, the woods were paved over & people were downright nasty!! I see the change here also & get "bitter".

The other reason pertains to the folks who have lived in an area for many years & have seen these "changes" in the economy (growth or decline), type of residents, crime rate, etc and are bitter & unhappy with the changes.

When I made the decision to move to Fla, I totally did not expect to live the "Jimmy Buffet" lifestyle of margaritas & manana. I expected the usual "go to work, pay the bills, cut the (ahem...greener...)grass", etc. I expected heat & hurricanes & all the other "problems" that come with the territory. BUT...I don't ***** & moan over the "negatives" because the "positives" I've found outweigh them 2 to 1.

I almost made the mistake of moving back up north because of the "romanticizing" of life up there in the past. Thank God providence stepped in when I was up there to bury my mom last March. When we were coming in for a landing in West Palm Beach on the way back, I looked out the window, saw the turquoise water & palm trees & greenery & bright-colored buildings & heard myself think "Thank God I'm HOME"!!! It actually shocked me!!

Well I guess I've droned on & on, but the point I want to make for the whiners & naysayers is: if you're unhappy with the place you are or the change(s) happening around you, then you need to change some aspect yourself. Whether it be moving out of the "offending" area or state, or coming to terms with the negatives in your personal life & moving on, or weighing the pros & cons & then making an effort to get more "pros" in your life.

No matter where we are, life is not perfect & the ONLY one who can make us happy is OURSELVES!!
 
Old 01-18-2008, 09:09 AM
 
491 posts, read 1,428,967 times
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Id say the biggest problem in upstate new york is the fact that alot of these people don't have the resources to move out even if they wanted to. Just another reason to be pissed. Honestly I have always liked western new york, but hate the rest of the state, and the fact that we have outragous taxes because of it.

I moved to Pittsburgh about a year ago and wow, its a lot worse here


And while you say, that anyone can pick up and move, alot of people in these areas don't even make enough money to put down a security deposit. You have to remember that in some parts of western new york, a 50,000 house is on the expensive side.
 
Old 01-18-2008, 10:04 AM
 
2,473 posts, read 5,427,640 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oktaren View Post
Id say the biggest problem in upstate new york is the fact that alot of these people don't have the resources to move out even if they wanted to. Just another reason to be pissed. Honestly I have always liked western new york, but hate the rest of the state, and the fact that we have outragous taxes because of it.

I moved to Pittsburgh about a year ago and wow, its a lot worse here


And while you say, that anyone can pick up and move, alot of people in these areas don't even make enough money to put down a security deposit. You have to remember that in some parts of western new york, a 50,000 house is on the expensive side.

Understandable in some instances. But I did not say that anyone can pick up & move. I said that people had to change something to effect positive in their lives (that MAY be moving to another place if they can). That could also be as simple as joining a club or taking the time to see the beauty of nature in their area, or growing herbs inside in the winter to "spice" up their cooking or helping Habitat for Humanity. Each situation is different, & no "cure" works for all. They KEY to all though is to make the conscious choice to make life better.

In other words, one can choose to wallow in sadness or anger or frustration OR one can choose small or large steps to effect a better outlook & life for themselves & make the best of a situation...basically taking ownership.

I'm not the best at conveying from my brain to paper to someone else's brain so if I misconstrued the "moving" issue, I apologise.
 
Old 01-18-2008, 10:24 AM
 
491 posts, read 1,428,967 times
Reputation: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jungle George View Post
Understandable in some instances. But I did not say that anyone can pick up & move. I said that people had to change something to effect positive in their lives (that MAY be moving to another place if they can). That could also be as simple as joining a club or taking the time to see the beauty of nature in their area, or growing herbs inside in the winter to "spice" up their cooking or helping Habitat for Humanity. Each situation is different, & no "cure" works for all. They KEY to all though is to make the conscious choice to make life better.

In other words, one can choose to wallow in sadness or anger or frustration OR one can choose small or large steps to effect a better outlook & life for themselves & make the best of a situation...basically taking ownership.

I'm not the best at conveying from my brain to paper to someone else's brain so if I misconstrued the "moving" issue, I apologise.
How many clubs are in a town of 2,000 people? Even in a town of 10,000 people, when the unemplyment rate hits close to 8%, there isn't alot to do. I understand what you are saying, but for many people there isn't much of an escape. Many don't even own their homes, so they can't change a whole lot there, and this is a pretty rural area. If you don't like being outside in the cold, for 6 months of the year, you will be miserable. I do like being outside during the cold, so its fine for me.

I mean, until recently, there wasn't even a habitat for humanity around here, and its not even in a convenient location for most people around here.
 
Old 01-18-2008, 10:44 AM
 
Location: Rochester, NY
134 posts, read 517,926 times
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I'll agree with Jungle George here.... MAKE your life better.

So there's not enough clubs to join, start another one. No Habitat for Humanity? Make it happen. I firmly believe those that want to find something to do, besides sit in a bar or in front of the TV, WILL find something to do.

And I think there are just as many people in these forums bitching about their home areas just as much as North Easter's.
 
Old 01-18-2008, 11:18 AM
 
2,473 posts, read 5,427,640 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oktaren View Post
How many clubs are in a town of 2,000 people? Even in a town of 10,000 people, when the unemplyment rate hits close to 8%, there isn't alot to do. I understand what you are saying, but for many people there isn't much of an escape. Many don't even own their homes, so they can't change a whole lot there, and this is a pretty rural area. If you don't like being outside in the cold, for 6 months of the year, you will be miserable. I do like being outside during the cold, so its fine for me.

I mean, until recently, there wasn't even a habitat for humanity around here, and its not even in a convenient location for most people around here.
If it is that bad up there, then maybe these folks should (again...choosing to make their life better instead of folding up) storm their town hall & corner their politicians to effect change for their AREA. There are also government agencies available to help these folks get a "hand up".

My parents told me about getting through the great Depression. Now, as then, it's not easy for a lot of folks but, there is ALWAYS a way to make your life better in some fashion. A lot of folks CHOOSE not to though.

My partner & I have seen despair & hopelessness in other folks eyes especially in 2004 when we got the 2 back-to-back hurricanes & people lost their homes. At that time WE chose to help those folks since we had no damage & those folks CHOSE to accept the help & take the initiative to run with the ball to rebuild & make their life better.
 
Old 01-18-2008, 12:32 PM
 
491 posts, read 1,428,967 times
Reputation: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jungle George View Post
If it is that bad up there, then maybe these folks should (again...choosing to make their life better instead of folding up) storm their town hall & corner their politicians to effect change for their AREA. There are also government agencies available to help these folks get a "hand up".

My parents told me about getting through the great Depression. Now, as then, it's not easy for a lot of folks but, there is ALWAYS a way to make your life better in some fashion. A lot of folks CHOOSE not to though.

My partner & I have seen despair & hopelessness in other folks eyes especially in 2004 when we got the 2 back-to-back hurricanes & people lost their homes. At that time WE chose to help those folks since we had no damage & those folks CHOSE to accept the help & take the initiative to run with the ball to rebuild & make their life better.
Well, the biggest problem is new york state, not the local governments. The state has such differences between upstate, downstate and western new york. So, I guess they should storm albany then, the only problem is, New York City has so many more people, that the government is run to favor them, not favor the people out in the sticks. The best solution would be the state splitting up. That way, the area would actually have a government that would be looking out for their needs.
 
Old 01-18-2008, 12:34 PM
 
491 posts, read 1,428,967 times
Reputation: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by Upstate Dave View Post
I'll agree with Jungle George here.... MAKE your life better.

So there's not enough clubs to join, start another one. No Habitat for Humanity? Make it happen. I firmly believe those that want to find something to do, besides sit in a bar or in front of the TV, WILL find something to do.

And I think there are just as many people in these forums bitching about their home areas just as much as North Easter's.
They are strugging to get by, they don't have the time and energy or resources to set up clubs, etc. They are trying to make it to the end of the month.

North Easter's? If you meant a noreaster, why would anyone complain about that?
 
Old 01-18-2008, 12:56 PM
 
2,473 posts, read 5,427,640 times
Reputation: 1204
Quote:
Originally Posted by oktaren View Post
Well, the biggest problem is new york state, not the local governments. The state has such differences between upstate, downstate and western new york. So, I guess they should storm albany then, the only problem is, New York City has so many more people, that the government is run to favor them, not favor the people out in the sticks. The best solution would be the state splitting up. That way, the area would actually have a government that would be looking out for their needs.
Their LOCAL government should be looking out for their needs & be their ears, eyes & voice in state government. That's why they're there & getting paid.

IMO if there's a partiality to NYC with the ignoring of the rural sections, then the local government needs to fight harder, louder & stronger to get their fair share for their areas. (sounds like everyday life doesn't it??)

My dad died in '76 & before he died he told me when I reached his age, there'd only be the poor & the rich because the middle-class working slobs were going the way of the dinosaur & greed & corruption were taking over. Well, I'm a middle-class working slob still & I'll be darned if me or all the folks I know are going to disappear without a fight to get a fair share while the politicians (who WE pay to work for US) lie cheat & steal & get rich.

If I don't do my job, I get fired. The same applies for politicians...if their area is not getting fair due, the taxpayers need to make their voices heard & get someone who'll do the job. Again, CHOOSING to get involved to make life better.
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