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people without friends simply don't fit into society's norms.
This is exactly true. I happen to be a gay man who doesn't like broadway, Lady Gaga, Britney or whoever, but likes rock music. I don't seem to fit in with people who are gay or fellow rock music fans. There are just so many stereotypes out there it makes it difficult for me to find friends who share both interests. You nget treated in the gay community as not being gay enough. How many rock/metal fans do you know are gay? It's supposed to be "macho."
I guess my point is that people are so blinded by society's norms and stereotypes that these people may miss out on something good.
I have a couple of really close friends, but the amount of people I actually know is a pretty large number of people that like talking to me and vice versa but I wouldn't say that they are close and if you look at the actual number of people I hang out with - it's not that many. I've never been at a point in my life where I had NO friends though. I have two adult kids, I have friends, etc... It's kind of hard for me to be a loner I guess LOL. When I meet someone that doesn't have ANY friends though? I would wonder about them, I would wonder if they are bitter and lose friends easily, I'd wonder a lot of things actually.
I think friends are important.
Hi,
I am an introvert and proud of it. I am 57 and I can honestly say I have made maybe 3 good friends. A friend I define as someone who I have the name, address and phone number in my book. One last thing these pieces of information have to be offered to you. You don’t ask for it. Unless you meet a young lady that you want to call then a phone number is a start. I also can say usually chat with them only 2-3 times a year. So don’t be so hard on yourself. Do like the other poster says and get out there. Just get out there to socialize and you’ll be surprised. During this time learn to spin a yarn and you will be remembered the next time you visit the watering hole. The first thing you have to come to grips with is your happiness and you have to become a friend first to yourself. He will be your confidant when trouble comes because then you have someone to logic issues out and this will make you feel better internally. Being happy inside also reflects on the outside and people see that reflection in your smile and personal appearance. Dressing is important. You dress like a slob you will attract slobs dress appropriately and you will attract winners. Just get out there and have fun..join a group no matter how lame it is you all will probably start laughing and laughter is what breaks the ice to starts in relationships.
So it's not terribly uncommon to be a loner. Americans tend to have "friends" (aka acquaintances), if anything. Our society deems that more is better. Facebook is a great example. How many of the "friends" do you really talk to on that site?
I have around 70, most of who I know personally. I rarely see or talk to any of them. Facebook just makes me feel more lonely and isolated than ever. It was fun the first few weeks, after that, I think it started to become detrimental in a way. At least all my friends are gathered in one spot, I used to wonder how they would even find out if I died because my family doesn't even know who many of them are.
What do you mean "no friends"? What, do you celebrate your birthday alone?
Pretty much.
I was planning on going to my mom's to milk it for all it's worth. (Never too old for that). But I found out before hand that a friend's band was playing so I opted to go to that. Alone. Didn't tell any of them it was my birthday. Then went around the corner to see another band that barely overlapped with the first band. When I got to the door I asked how long they were on. A guy came up behind me and said "third song" and said to the doorman "He's my guest" so they let me in freed.
I had a brief awkward conversation with some young Bettie Page looking lady next to me on the bus. She said "Shut Up You ****ing *****" to some crazy old lady who was complaining that they let a wheelchair on slowing her trip by 2 minutes. I knew I just had to make an effort to talk to her. I was already halfway in the bag. She sorta responded and didn't try to ignore me or put me off but it will still kinda stilted and awkward.
hahahahahaha
i am frightened by how much i agree with this. secretly i feel the same. girls want to talk about clothes and babies and most of my men friends wind up hitting on me at some point. conversation with someone who actually is GOOD at it and wants to talk about HEAVY stuff is so rare that it makes me weep for the human race.
It's not like i'm closed to interacting with people, in fact people come up to talk to me, seems I have an approachable-look. And no, I don't cower into corners scratching myself in earnest in social situations. I go and talk to people and I'm fairly certain that I'm an open person ... just that after a few minutes, ugh, get-the-hell-away-from-me, talking to myself would be more entertaining.
So, your guy friends hit on you? Are you male or female?
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