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Old 02-17-2011, 04:15 PM
 
Location: New England
1,215 posts, read 2,583,499 times
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Growing up, my mother wasn't the hugging type. So, it pretty much stayed that way all along. I'm in my mid 40's and it just wouldn't feel right doing it. Maybe some know what I'm saying.

But I have no problem giving hugs to other people, whether it be some of my wife's friends or older people that I know. Feels fine and natural.

Anyone else this way?
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Old 02-17-2011, 04:27 PM
 
Location: NC
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freud would have a lot to say about that
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Old 02-17-2011, 04:33 PM
 
769 posts, read 1,013,298 times
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i get what you mean, some people are not huggable
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Old 02-17-2011, 04:37 PM
 
Location: New England
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Quote:
Originally Posted by suedonym View Post
freud would have a lot to say about that
I bet he would. That would be an interesting conversation.
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Old 02-17-2011, 04:57 PM
 
2,068 posts, read 4,336,431 times
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Yeah, I get what you're saying.
My family is big on hugging so that's all natural and normal for me, they aren't however big on kisses on the cheek.

But being out in the world and surrounded all the time by people from cultures that do do the kiss on the cheek it has become natural to great these people/friends with kisses on the cheek but I don't normally do it with my own family because it would feel weird because it isn't something we do...

run-on
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Old 02-17-2011, 05:49 PM
 
3,409 posts, read 4,644,833 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DFOR View Post
Growing up, my mother wasn't the hugging type. So, it pretty much stayed that way all along. I'm in my mid 40's and it just wouldn't feel right doing it. Maybe some know what I'm saying.

But I have no problem giving hugs to other people, whether it be some of my wife's friends or older people that I know. Feels fine and natural.

Anyone else this way?
Heck no! lol My mom still calls me by the name she called me when I was about 3! lol She also says.. "give mommy a hug" around people! lol I guess it's not all bad! lol
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Old 02-17-2011, 06:08 PM
 
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Yes, my mother was/is a cold person. She didn't believe in showing that you love your children because it would make you proudful (weird I know-she intrepret the Bible wrong like everything else). Anyway, when I was around the age of 30 y.o. she decided it was time that she could show her emotions. Too late for me because I wasn't used to it. I cringe when she wants a hug or kiss now. I have no problems at all hugging everyone else.
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Old 02-17-2011, 06:12 PM
 
Location: Middle America
37,409 posts, read 53,563,461 times
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It's hard to up and change dynamics that got set very firmly years and years ago.

Parents need to bear in mind that their actions set the tone for things early on, and behave accordingly.
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Old 02-17-2011, 06:17 PM
 
3,573 posts, read 6,473,742 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
It's hard to up and change dynamics that got set very firmly years and years ago.

Parents need to bear in mind that their actions set the tone for things early on, and behave accordingly.
Yep, and that's why since my children were born that they get all the love, attention, hugs and kisses and still do to this day and their young adults now. I rather be over-loved then under-loved. My kids are well-adjusted because they received hugs and kisses regularly.
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Old 02-17-2011, 07:52 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,150,679 times
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I know you don't like my posts and don't respond to them, but I'll tell you something anyway... This thread tells me the problems you have with your wife are apparently hardly her fault only. Of course, that was to be expected.
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