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What's going on? He said he would keep in contact with you, but it would have to be IN SECRET. And you think that his GF feels insecure without cause?
The only reason they need to contact each other in secret is because his girlfriend was insecure in the first place. If his girlfriend didn't care about the wall post, there would be no need for them to talk in secret.
It's not like they're trying to establish a secret relationship. They just want to be friends but they need to do it in secret since his girlfriend doesn't want them to be friends.
What's going on? He said he would keep in contact with you, but it would have to be IN SECRET. And you think that his GF feels insecure without cause?
That's why I was confused. If she's insecure already and she finds out we're still chatting but 'behind her back' wouldn't she be more jealous?
Hubby and I were talking about it during lunch and he mentioned that it ticks him off. If he's wanting to keep in touch 'in secret' and said it was for my husband too, then he thinks it's ok for me to talk to him behind my husband's back. Ticked hubby off and I don't blame him. When you put it that way, it bothers me. Apparently all this time we've chatted, that's why he sends me the chat message things, so she didn't know he was talking to me. Thinking until their relationship is in a better place or done maybe not talking to him at all is the best bet. I did let him know I don't keep secrets from hubby. He knows who I talk to, what I talk about, etc. He's my best friend so he knows everything going on in my friend's lives.
Quote:
Originally Posted by city_data91
Exactly. It could be worse. What if he deleted her
That's true. At this point it may be best for him if he blocks me. And every other female on his friends list. If, that is, the issues are truly her issues and not his.
Earlier in the thread there was discussion about how employers could check on you through facebook. I just ran across this article: Employers can 'credit check' your Facebook (http://www.myfoxtampabay.com/dpp/news/national/employers-can-credit-check-your-facebook-06212011 - broken link)
That's why I was confused. If she's insecure already and she finds out we're still chatting but 'behind her back' wouldn't she be more jealous?
I think you missed the main point I was making. If he wants to continue the "relationship" with you, even though it is totally innocent and "just friends" but it has to be in secret, then my immediate thought would be, "What else is he trying to hide?" Just how much respect does he have for the person he is in a personal, face-to-face relationship with? If he feels she is being too possessive, he needs to address that himself, NOT go behind her back. IMO, that is the coward's way out, and if you go along with it, you appear to show no more respect than he is. I say, back off totally, let him deal with it himself, and just check in later to see how he is doing? Just a thought, if your husband knows him well enough, it might be better if HE contacted your friend at this time to let him know something to the effect that the two of you consider him a friend and if he needs you at some time, you will be available for him, but you want to give him some time now to work on this new relationship.
At this point it may be best for him if he blocks me. And every other female on his friends list. If, that is, the issues are truly her issues and not his.
I get where you're coming from...But public comments, as harmless as they may seem, can come across a certain way and end up looking weird and sometimes inappropriate. Let that be your Facebook lesson, lol.
Maybe he took it the wrong way, and didn't want anyone else getting the wrong idea about you two. Which is why he tried to nip that in the bud asap.
Heck, he might even think you were flirting with him, which is why he brought up your husband, his girlfriend, and then still, you proposed to him the idea of "keeping it secret." Making it even more awkward and inappropriate!
Regardless, it all sounds like a major misunderstanding...
FB is only as dramatic as you want it to be. I've had it for over a year now and have had no drama. It's about controlling who you add and what you allow to happen there. It's a pretty simple task, don't know why some people find it difficult.
Don't really have to add people for there to be drama.... An unfriendly message here or there about how this person doesn't like you and you never even met them and so on and so forth.
Location: Oklahoma(formerly SoCalif) Originally Mich,
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ronzou
Don't really have to add people for there to be drama.... An unfriendly message here or there about how this person doesn't like you and you never even met them and so on and so forth.
FB can be set to where only approved friends can post or read any information.
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Thinking until their relationship is in a better place or done maybe not talking to him at all is the best bet. I did let him know I don't keep secrets from hubby. He knows who I talk to, what I talk about, etc. He's my best friend so he knows everything going on in my friend's lives. 
