Roommate issue - Am I being unreasonable? (person, house, business)
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I am currently living in a really cramped, dorm-style apartment. I share the room with another girl who never leaves the house. Seriously, ever. She's up til 5am, and sleeps til noon-1pm. A few weeks back, I NICELY let her know that the light from her laptop late at night makes it nearly impossible for me to sleep. It is distracting. I need darkness to sleep. I asked her if after a certain hour (midnight - 1am) if she could kindly go into the living room to use her laptop.
For the first few days, she did. When I asked if it was okay to turn the light out, she got the hint and went to the living room. But then all of a sudden she started challenging the whole idea. Instead of leaving, she'd lay there and continue chatting or whatever she does online. When I would ask her if she would leave the room, she would make it known that she didn't think she had to.. and then eventually she'd slooooowly and hesitantly go.
Last night was the same story. It was 1:30am, I had an early class, and I asked if she minded if I could turn the light off. 15 minutes later she's still there on her laptop. I asked her (not so gently this time) if she could PLEASE go to the living room. She sarcastically responded, "Is it really that bright??". To which I responded - "Yes, it IS that bright, we go over this every night. It is a distraction for me. Some people actually have to get up and do things the next day!" Then it dissolved into an argument after that, that ended with her storming out of the room and slamming doors all over the place.
Am I being that unreasonable? It's not like I'm going to bed at 9pm. I wait until after midnight- usually even after 1:30am to turn out the lights. And she is home in bed all day, every day on her laptop. She has all day to dick around on her laptop in bed, and she doesn't have anything to do in the mornings, so what's the problem? If I come home extra late and the light is out, I stay in the living room to do my business until I'm ready for bed. It's common decency, right? Or am I somehow out of line for asking her to leave the room?
You have as much right for darkness as she does to use her laptop where she wishes. Neither is wrong. What needs to happen is respect & compromise. Now, whether she leaves the house is irrelevant, her business not yours.
You have as much right for darkness as she does to use her laptop where she wishes. Neither is wrong. What needs to happen is respect & compromise. Now, whether she leaves the house is irrelevant, her business not yours.
She can sit at home and rot all she wants, I just pointed it out because she is on her computer all DAY and I'm surprised that she's so offended at my request. It's not as if she's been out toiling all day and wants to relax in bed with her computer... she does that 20 hours a day already.
Sharing a room means compromise, I agree. If I had it my way, I'd be in bed by 11. Instead, I wait until after midnight. That's my compromise. I also go to the living room when I'm out extra late, no questions asked.
Most "dorm type" situations have one bed on one side of the room and the other bed on the other side of the room to give each person as much "space" as possible. Therefore, assuming that you have this kind of setup I would recommend that you put up some kind of light barrier between your side and hers. You can do this with some kind of partition or by stringing curtains up across the room or around your bed.
As a "night owl" myself, I know that I function much better at night than during the day. I would be very upset if some one tried to force me into their schedule because the light from my laptop was bothering them, since, presumably they pay just as much rent as you do.
If erecting a light barrier is not practical, then I would suggest looking into a sleeping mask as one of the other posters mentioned. They are inexpensive and do a good job. Personally, during the day I just put my head under the pillow and it works great for me. YMMV
can you buy one of those sleep masks? They work wonders.
Also sleeping aids (over the counter ones) are amazing
Sleep aids... no, they make me groggy in the morning and eventually lose effectiveness. And then once you stop taking them, you can't sleep! I figure if all I need is a dark room, why mess up my body chemistry with unnecessary stuff?
I tried a sleep mask. Lol, call me neurotic but when I put it on, it made sleeping harder. My eyes would start watering and all I could think about was this heavy thing over my eyeballs.
Most "dorm type" situations have one bed on one side of the room and the other bed on the other side of the room to give each person as much "space" as possible. Therefore, assuming that you have this kind of setup I would recommend that you put up some kind of light barrier between your side and hers. You can do this with some kind of partition or by stringing curtains up across the room or around your bed.
As a "night owl" myself, I know that I function much better at night than during the day. I would be very upset if some one tried to force me into their schedule because the light from my laptop was bothering them, since, presumably they pay just as much rent as you do.
If erecting a light barrier is not practical, then I would suggest looking into a sleeping mask as one of the other posters mentioned. They are inexpensive and do a good job. Personally, during the day I just put my head under the pillow and it works great for me. YMMV
20yrsinBranson
I'm not forcing her into my schedule. She can stay up as late as she wants, but if she's already been in the room all day, what's the problem with going to the living room? She has an entire house to clack away at her computer. If I was going to bed at 8pm, I'd understand. But I wait until early morning. It is her choice to keep the sleeping schedule that she does. She DOESN'T work, she doesn't do anything, so if anyone can afford to do any adjusting, you'd think it'd be her. I'd grant her the same courtesy. The times that she has fallen asleep or has been sick, I took my business to the living room after a certain hour.
you can get 2 bottles of herbal sleeping aids at the cvs, I suffer from insomnia and trust me they are amazing.
No chemicals and no dependence issues, they are all natural
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