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I've always lived on a limited budget, but learned to live within my means quickly, as I had nobody to bail me out. I've been amazed at how friends of mine, with way better salaries, or husbands and families who give them money or produce a second income, etc., would try to hit me up for money, just because I was frugal enough to have some savings.
For instance, at one point in my life I had gone back to school full time, and was living on student loans. Now, we're talking community college undergrad loans - barely any money beyond tuition. Yet, I had a car (a paid for ancient beat-up Toyota that ran with only liability insurance), and a cheap apartment in the near-ghetto. And yet, a friend of mine who worked full time, with a husband who worked full time, and two car/truck payments, hit me up for money when she heard I had gotten my next student loan payment.
Her reason for needing money? It's just so hard to make ends meet with two car payments and all those credit card bills and student loans, that she'd defaulted on...
So, I said, well, I can't loan you any money, but I can help you figure out your budget. I think you should sell those new cars, or at least one of them and carpool with your husband to town. Her eyes glazed over.
People want to live the champagne life on a beer budget - and want some of us who actually live on generic beer budgets, to help them do it!
I once had a tenant tell me that she couldn't pay the rent because she had a vacation planned already that she needed the money for.
Uh, well, you get to take the vacation or have an apartment to come home to. Your choice.
I had another tenant who said she couldn't make the rent that month because she spent too much money on a tattoo. She ended up getting evicted for non-payment of rent.
It's the reasoning that completely baffles me. Like there's no "reason" switch. No "logic" switch.
Anyway, I have lots of examples, but what's one of yours?
The tenant examples made me think of when an investor client called me to ask what I thought of a tenant that couldn't pay all the rent on time, but wanted to know if he could re-paint interior in other colors. My answer was if he could afford to re-paint, he could afford to pay the rent.
On a personal level, my sister is one of the "wizards of Wall Street", makes a VERY good salary, has no savings and is in huge debt (now can you guess why they tanked the U.S. economy?). When her daughter went to college, she had to use student loans (yet mommy made a huge salary). Whenever the student loan payment came for the daughter, mommy would "borrow" from it to pay her monthly bills. I am so hoping that my niece has better money management skills than her mother.
When I worked for the electric utility on the phones I would hear the most ridiculous excuses for not paying their electric bill and reasons why the electric company should turn their power back on without payment. My favorite was a man who screamed at me that since we had turned off his power he was going to lose all the meat in his freezer. He screamed " I just bought an entire side of beef!". I said maybe he should have used the money on his bill instead of beef. He hung up on me. I had someone tell me that they couldn't pay their electric bill because they had just paid all their money to the cable company. I asked her if she realized that the TV wouldn't work without power when she did that. She hung up on me. A guy told me we had to turn his power on because if we didn't the hundreds of dollars worth of tropical fish he had in his tanks would all die. Well, you know what happened....
I have a friend whose rent is 2/3 of her salary. She seriously needs her money. She inherited some money when her dad died and people came out of the woodwork to borrow money from her. One friend borrowed three thousand dollars and never paid it back, but 3 months after borrowing the money "friend" bought a brand new truck!
Gas money ( which is fine ) but when they added, "oh and btw, stop and grab me a pack of smokes when you bring the money over", it really pissed me off.
Or when I've gotten another call in the same week asking for gas money because "Gosh, smokes are expensive. It took half my gas money to buy a pack, so I need more." All this when they complain about being broke, late on payments and no food in the house.
Yeah I know it's NOT a lot of money, but it still makes me angry. If I had to ask to borrow, it would be for something critical and I wouldn't ask for more than I needed to feed a habit (and yes, I use to smoke).
Gas money ( which is fine ) but when they added, "oh and btw, stop and grab me a pack of smokes when you bring the money over", it really pissed me off.
Or when I've gotten another call in the same week asking for gas money because "Gosh, smokes are expensive. It took half my gas money to buy a pack, so I need more." All this when they complain about being broke, late on payments and no food in the house.
Yeah I know it's NOT a lot of money, but it still makes me angry. If I had to ask to borrow, it would be for something critical and I wouldn't ask for more than I needed to feed a habit (and yes, I use to smoke).
And how much of YOUR gas money did you have to burn going over to give them gas money? Time for someone to walk to work or take the bus.
I've always lived on a limited budget, but learned to live within my means quickly, as I had nobody to bail me out. I've been amazed at how friends of mine, with way better salaries, or husbands and families who give them money or produce a second income, etc., would try to hit me up for money, just because I was frugal enough to have some savings.
For instance, at one point in my life I had gone back to school full time, and was living on student loans. Now, we're talking community college undergrad loans - barely any money beyond tuition. Yet, I had a car (a paid for ancient beat-up Toyota that ran with only liability insurance), and a cheap apartment in the near-ghetto. And yet, a friend of mine who worked full time, with a husband who worked full time, and two car/truck payments, hit me up for money when she heard I had gotten my next student loan payment.
Her reason for needing money? It's just so hard to make ends meet with two car payments and all those credit card bills and student loans, that she'd defaulted on...
So, I said, well, I can't loan you any money, but I can help you figure out your budget. I think you should sell those new cars, or at least one of them and carpool with your husband to town. Her eyes glazed over.
People want to live the champagne life on a beer budget - and want some of us who actually live on generic beer budgets, to help them do it!
I once had a tenant tell me that she couldn't pay the rent because she had a vacation planned already that she needed the money for.
Uh, well, you get to take the vacation or have an apartment to come home to. Your choice.
I had another tenant who said she couldn't make the rent that month because she spent too much money on a tattoo. She ended up getting evicted for non-payment of rent.
It's the reasoning that completely baffles me. Like there's no "reason" switch. No "logic" switch.
Anyway, I have lots of examples, but what's one of yours?
My soon-to-be ex-husband had come by to visit our daughter. He tried to hit me up for $20 because it was his turn to buy the doughnuts for his AA meeting. I laughed and told him that I know they pass the basket for that at AA meetings. I know my ex--he would have volunteered to buy the doughnuts just to get the money for a couple of beers and worry about buying doughnuts for the meeting at the last minute.
My soon-to-be ex-husband had come by to visit our daughter. He tried to hit me up for $20 because it was his turn to buy the doughnuts for his AA meeting. I laughed and told him that I know they pass the basket for that at AA meetings. I know my ex--he would have volunteered to buy the doughnuts just to get the money for a couple of beers and worry about buying doughnuts for the meeting at the last minute.
my brother came up with some doozies before and after I took over our mom's finances so he couldn't bleed her dry..... but I think I have blocked them from my memory now......
Many years ago, when I was in college, I had two room mates who worked at the same company, held the same job with the same salary for the same number of years. They were as different as night and day in regards to money. Grasshopper smoked and drank a lot. She liked to go to the bars several nights a week and would often buy rounds for her "friends" (who often didn't buy rounds when it was their turn).
Ant didn't smoke and occasionally would go out drinking but would nurse one mixed drink all evening or drink soda. That was their big difference in spending but it was amazing how that added up.
Ant had a pretty new, used car which she bought with cash she had saved up while working.
Grasshopper had an old clunker that was held together with rust.
Ant had a stylish wardrobe of nice clothes that she bought on sale from good department stores.
Grasshopper had literally 3 or 4 blouses and two skirts for work, 2 pairs of jeans and a couple of sweaters and 2 or 3 pair of shoes all purchased at Target or K-Mart. (We shared a closet and I was constantly amazed at how few clothes she had). She always kept her clothes neat & clean but it was hard because she constantly was doing hand laundry.
Ant had a number of "nice things" like a brand new sewing machine, dishes and cook wear and would take a small, but nice vacation every summer.
Grasshopper had none of those things.
But, the biggest problem came when Grasshopper had to go to the eye doctor & buy glasses but needed to ask her parents for the money. This was when she was 22 and had been working full time for four years. This was around the time when I moved to a different apartment but it seemed to be a real "wake-up" call for her.
I always remembered the big difference in their lives just because one smoked a pack or so of cigarettes a day and drank at bars and the other didn't.
PS. Grasshopper was always asking us (her room mates) for cigarette money because she would frequently run out before pay day. We didn't loan it to her
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