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Old 02-08-2013, 11:23 PM
 
Location: On the edge of the universe
994 posts, read 1,586,821 times
Reputation: 1445

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To be more specific, she's turning into sort of a prick. I hate to say that even on her and was really debating whether I should even post this but I want to know if other people have experienced something similar to this as well.

For most of our lives I got along pretty well with my younger sister. Granted we had our bumpy times and even siblings on good terms will occasionally argue with each other. However, it seems like that all changed about six years ago. In 2007 my sister got a job at the local BS credit card company in their collections department and has pretty much worked in banking ever since. Now, just for some background, this particular credit card company she started at has a long history of really screwing over people on their credit card accounts. Basically, the whole company is nothing but legalized graft; I won't mention the name of the company here but they're one of the largest issuers of credit cards to people with bad credit, basically. I interviewed there about a few months before she got hired there and when I saw how they really operated, I got the hell out of there after the interview; no way would I do that ****. Little sis got hired and shortly after her personality went sour; she almost seemed to lose her sense of humor overnight, she became more smug, conceited and overall more obnoxious. She worked that place for about 4 years then transferred to Wells Fargo about two years ago for a job in their phone banker position (and out of collections). I thought that she might change for the better when she moved but she didn't. In fact I'm under the impression that she's getting worse; I can't even make small talk to her now without her becoming borderline nasty.

I also noticed that Little sis started to get involved a lot more with her coworkers than before; my sister usually didn't hang out with coworkers and tended to befriend people from class or in the community (my sister tends to be an extrovert) but ever since she started that collections job I don't think she goes outside her little work clique for friends like she used to. I also know that she had both a bit of a drinking problem and increased money problems shortly after she started at the collections job. My parents caught her spending some of her paychecks on her 'friends', mostly on drinks and crap. She was spending around $200 - $500 a month on various crap at one point and I think my parents had to bail her out! As for her 'friends', I've met people from both of the credit card operations (sister's friends and otherwise) and almost everyone of them comes across to me as a creeper or a two-bit lowlife.

I'm aware of what's wrong but I'm partially ranting here and I'm also wanting to know if anyone else has experienced what I've seen here. Personally, I think my sister may be getting involved with some wierd cult or something since many of the people who work at the credit card back operations here tend to intermingle with each other only and I wonder if it's just the industry. To me it seems like the credit card outfits here tend to attract the same kind of person, the one who would sell you down the river for a nickel. Am I the only one who sees this?
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Old 02-08-2013, 11:43 PM
 
Location: Texas
5,717 posts, read 18,769,054 times
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A couple of things. You can't run your sisters life. You can either accept her for what she is or close the door on the relationship. My sister was the town socialite and anybody that was anybody was her best friend. Unfortunately she found alcohol, got divorced and married a lowlife fresh out of the pen. Now she knows how to screw over credit card companies, even get credit cards in other peoples name, and can scam a scammer. All while being the church secretary. She owes me a lot of money from bad checks and won't pay- says it my fault for taking them. I closed the door on our relationship. Don't know her, don't want know about her, she doesn't exist in my book. Drinking is not something I do even in public. I'm not against drinking just I don't care to be around an alcoholic. It doesn't run in the family and alcoholism is a self inflicted pain to the family that the person has no regard for anyway. So for me the decision was fairly easy. It doesn't sound like you need to go as far my issues but you might start putting some distance between you and her. If she inquires why, tell her. It may make a difference and then again, you may end up having to close the door. But you can't run her life. You either accept her for what she is or close the door.
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Old 02-09-2013, 01:46 PM
 
Location: On the edge of the universe
994 posts, read 1,586,821 times
Reputation: 1445
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrapperL View Post
A couple of things. You can't run your sisters life. You can either accept her for what she is or close the door on the relationship. My sister was the town socialite and anybody that was anybody was her best friend. Unfortunately she found alcohol, got divorced and married a lowlife fresh out of the pen. Now she knows how to screw over credit card companies, even get credit cards in other peoples name, and can scam a scammer. All while being the church secretary. She owes me a lot of money from bad checks and won't pay- says it my fault for taking them. I closed the door on our relationship. Don't know her, don't want know about her, she doesn't exist in my book. Drinking is not something I do even in public. I'm not against drinking just I don't care to be around an alcoholic. It doesn't run in the family and alcoholism is a self inflicted pain to the family that the person has no regard for anyway. So for me the decision was fairly easy. It doesn't sound like you need to go as far my issues but you might start putting some distance between you and her. If she inquires why, tell her. It may make a difference and then again, you may end up having to close the door. But you can't run her life. You either accept her for what she is or close the door.
Unfortunately you may be right. It's just hard for me to let go of this since she was such a different person before this crap!
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Old 02-09-2013, 04:29 PM
 
Location: Canada
7,645 posts, read 5,414,058 times
Reputation: 8781
Quote:
Originally Posted by fireandice1000 View Post
It's just hard for me to let go of this since she was such a different person before this crap!
That person is dead and gone forever. The best you can hope for is that eventually your sister either experiences some life-changing event OR develops new friends with better values to influence her. In either case though she'll just become different again. She'll never be the person you remember because of her life experiences. Life experiences change us all.

Enduring your sister's nastiness accomplishes nothing. You just lose her respect by accepting it. Some distance seems to be in order.
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