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I have quite a few cousins, some who I hardly ever see, and one who I've never even met before! One of my cousins also passed away, and I attended his funeral, even though I'd only actually met him a few times. Most of my cousins live overseas, so I suppose it's hard to establish a close relationship with them, but even the ones who live here, I often wonder how close the relationship really is. Do most people consider cousins just like any other stranger, if they're not close to them? If they're good friends, do you consider them the same as your other friends, or a bit more special, like halfway like or even just like a sibling?
Btw let's just talk about first cousins here...I dont really know any 2nd or 3rd cousins, actually I do know some distant cousins i'm not sure how many degrees separated they are but yeah, I'm not talking about them, just first cousins who are biologically related.
Depends how close you are. When families lived closer to each other cousins would develop a strong relationship. Now most people are like you...cousins are basically dtrangers
My husband and his brothers are all very close to all of their first cousins and we see them as often as we can which can be 4 or 5 times a year or 1 time in a year. It all depends on everyone's scheduling and what is going on in their lives.
My own cousins, 3 of them I never see and haven't seen any of them for 20+ years. Their Mother is a very toxic human and she has taught them all to be just as toxic.
The 4th cousin I haven't seen in a few years, we live in different states and she has her own family, works, goes to school, and is just overall very busy.
I am 11 years older than the first cousin who was born and I have a son who is the same as as the 3rd cousin who was born so we actually do come from somewhat different societal times as well. We really don't have much in common because of the age gap.
I am not particularly close to any of my cousins. It makes me kind of sad that that's the case. I lived fairly close to them growing up, and we saw them occasionally, but we did not grow up as close as I would have expected, given how close our mothers (sisters) are. I don't feel a particular connection to them, except when I think about my own sister. I hope our kids grow up closer then my cousins and I did.
On my mother's side I have six cousins and we do make an effort to get together once a year. On my father's side, rarely. I value the chance to stay together as a family.
I would not know any of my cousins if I met them face to face. I must have at least 40 of them, as my parents came from big families, and many of them had lots of kids. But having moved to another state as a young child, I only saw them once a year - if that - growing up. I would have loved to grow up surrounded by relatives.
My kids and their cousins grew up in the same town together, were close to the same ages and had close relationships. It has changed since everyone went their separate ways, but it was nice for them growing up.
Lately I've been reading some Jane Austen and Edith Wharton, and it's absolutely amazing how strong the cousinly bond is in their tales. Nothing like that nowadays, at least not in my family. One of my (grown-up) close relatives has no siblings and no cousins, how about that?!
My mom still talks to her brothers from time to time, but that's pretty much as far as family relations go around here..
That said I know people who are real tight with their cousins, and that seems to be nice.
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