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Old 02-19-2014, 07:05 PM
 
Location: New York
757 posts, read 971,955 times
Reputation: 324

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So today was my birthday and I must say it's the most empty birthday I ever had in my life. Normally, I don't care about my birthday, ever since I was 17-18 my birthday has always made me depressed or sad. I just don't understand why people celebrate another year closer to death, doesn't make sense to me (but that's another post). Anyway, I felt like today the only people who showed me any genuine love was my aunt, mother, and one of my uncles. And ofcourse, how could I forget the strangers I haven't spoken to in years wishing me a "HBD" on Facebook *sarcasm*.

One thing i've noticed was most of my really close friends didn't even say Happy Birthday on Facebook, not a call, nor a text, just nothing. My girlfriend is still arguing with me over Valentines Day (stupid story), apparently Valentines Day is more important to her than my birthday. Even coming home, my mom and my uncle said Happy Birthday to me, and I felt like they meant it. My other uncle didn't say a word, he just walked right by me and went out the door, and my brother didn't say anything to me either. My father didn't even call me, not even a text from him smh.

Listen, I appreciate the birthday wishes i've received, really I do. However, even though I don't understand the concept of a birthday, I do understand people take it very personally. So in that case, I feel really hurt that many who claimed to love me didn't wish me well on a day they would want people to wish them well.

Sorry, I just felt like getting this out of my system.
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Old 02-19-2014, 07:21 PM
 
16,833 posts, read 15,136,756 times
Reputation: 20777
Maybe the people who love and know you are just being respectful of the fact you are so pessimistic about birthdays.
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Old 02-19-2014, 07:23 PM
 
12,539 posts, read 13,293,609 times
Reputation: 28940
I'm assuming you make a big stink out of everyone else's birthdays, right?
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Old 02-19-2014, 08:33 PM
 
5,549 posts, read 5,880,090 times
Reputation: 13121
Happy birthday!
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Old 02-19-2014, 08:36 PM
 
Location: Western Colorado
11,833 posts, read 13,623,258 times
Reputation: 29125
Well happy birthday. BTW, on my birthday in 1997 my wife told me she wanted a divorce. So it can always be worse.
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Old 02-19-2014, 08:47 PM
 
Location: Northern Illinois
2,187 posts, read 3,901,785 times
Reputation: 6370
Sorry you felt that way on your birthday. I was born on my Dad's birthday and he was a twin. So....when I was a kid I always "had" to share my "big day" with them and I think that was when I truly learned that the joy of celebrating your life is not about cake and presents - it's about the love and memories to be made with those you love. I miss my Dad and Uncle now that they are both long gone - my big day is now my own, and my mind and heart are forever locked in the past - I cannot celebrate my day without missing them on what was theirs too. I guess my point here is this - it's your day to enjoy. Take it, own it, do something that makes YOU happy and if somebody remembers it, fine....if not - life will go on. There is sometimes so very little to celebrate any more - so from one stranger to another - I celebrate you - have a happy birthday, have some cake and do something to make this next year your best one yet. I'm pretty sure your mom and others actually love you every single day - but maybe they sense your dislike of the celebration and keep it low key for your benefit. Communication could help that I guess. But truly, Happy Birthday!!!
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Old 02-19-2014, 08:49 PM
 
2,727 posts, read 2,439,613 times
Reputation: 4101
As you grow older, relationships become much more about quality vs quantity.
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Old 02-19-2014, 09:59 PM
 
11,123 posts, read 8,839,002 times
Reputation: 18219
I haven't noted or celebrated a birthday since I turned 21, 40+ years ago. IMO birthdays are for children.
I'm aghast re your claim to not care about yours while at the same time castigating those who honor what they perceive as your wish.
What's that all about? Passive/aggressive, much? What is your real complaint?

fwiw, I'm active on Facebook and I opted out of showing my birthday. Easy fix. My FB friends don't see my birthday so it smoothly glides by without mention.
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Old 02-19-2014, 10:11 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
27,269 posts, read 17,637,604 times
Reputation: 42050
You celebrate your birthday because you have lived another year! Believe me, every day, every year is a gift.

But since you dislike birthdays, why do you wish others would remember them? I hate to tell you, but most people don't care that much about other people's special days. If a few friends wish you happy birthday, be happy for those friends.

And do the same for them, OK?
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Old 02-20-2014, 08:06 AM
 
Location: SoCal again
17,785 posts, read 14,659,995 times
Reputation: 35486
Happy Birthday!!

Don't overanalyze. Friends can be good friends without remembering your birthday or making a big deal out of it.There is more important things to focus on, believe me.

But generally this is the rule: If you make a big stink out of other people's birthday, they are more likely to do the same with yours. If you want to be sure they don't forget it, then announce it a week before. Example "Wow, in one week I will be turning .., I still feel like I am .... years old" or "I hope the weather is nice on my birthday next Friday ..."
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