SO mother claims I poisoned her (girlfriend, siblings, person, holidays)
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So anyway my Thanksgiving with my SO mom was cut short when she announced I was a ***** etc. We left and had a nice Thanksgiving at home. His mother is now claiming I put poison in her sugar bowl making her have to go to the hospital. How do I handle such a crazy thing? Clearly there is something going on, but, I don't think I need to subject myself to that. My poor SO is simply so upset about this, but, very very supportive of me.
Is your mom possibly suffering from dementia/Alzheimer's? It is very common for dementia patients to make claims their relatives or caregivers are trying to kill them. That was the very first thing that jumped into my mind!
If that's the case, it's the disease talking. Don't take it seriously.
Has she been known to make accusations such as this (paranoia) in the past with anyone else?
Have you spent much time around her? Has she always disliked you?
One of the very common markers of certain mental illnesses is thinking others are poisoning them.
In reality, it may be she dislikes you so much, she wished she could have poisoned you and she has thus reconstructed her own crazy thoughts into YOUR poisoning HER.
In any case, this sounds like a mental health issue more than a relationship issue.
EDIT: Just saw what Yellowsnow wrote and she is absolutely correct -- Alzheimers patients can become very suspicious, paranoid and also often fixate on being poisoned/killed.
In any case, this sounds like a mental health issue more than a relationship issue.
EDIT: Just saw what Yellowsnow wrote and she is absolutely correct -- Alzheimers patients can become very suspicious, paranoid and also often fixate on being poisoned/killed.
I agree, sounds like a health/mental health issue. It definitely could be Alzheimers-related. Your SO may want to have her checked out by a doctor if this isn't her usual MO.
So anyway my Thanksgiving with my SO mom was cut short when she announced I was a ***** etc. We left and had a nice Thanksgiving at home. His mother is now claiming I put poison in her sugar bowl making her have to go to the hospital. How do I handle such a crazy thing? Clearly there is something going on, but, I don't think I need to subject myself to that. My poor SO is simply so upset about this, but, very very supportive of me.
Tell her to get in line...tell her, her Turkey was sooo bad that you can't stop throwing up and tossing it out the rear at the same time!!! Tell her to expect a call from your attorney if this Kayopectate with Paragoric doesn't work.....in fact, tell her that you have severe whiplash from all the vomiting and rushing to the toilet.
You are not a woman to be toyed with. Take no prisoners. Also, toss in a comment or two about your long lost relative that just got out of prison. He was in for 20 years or so after cutting his mother's throat but, you don't know all the details.....yet. He does have a temper though....something about garrotes and knives and watches a LOT of criminal shows late at night....how almost ANYTHING can set him off....how you use to be close to him but.....
She'll get the message.....a few late night hangups on her phone with heavy breathing from a payphone, or some soccer mom's phone you don't care for, should do the trick.....juuuuuuust enough to get her thinking....at least you won't have to spend holidays over there anymore and that should be okay?
Has she been known to make accusations such as this (paranoia) in the past with anyone else?
Have you spent much time around her? Has she always disliked you?
One of the very common markers of certain mental illnesses is thinking others are poisoning them.
In reality, it may be she dislikes you so much, she wished she could have poisoned you and she has thus reconstructed her own crazy thoughts into YOUR poisoning HER.
In any case, this sounds like a mental health issue more than a relationship issue.
EDIT: Just saw what Yellowsnow wrote and she is absolutely correct -- Alzheimers patients can become very suspicious, paranoid and also often fixate on being poisoned/killed.
Thanksgiving was the first time I met her. My SO says she has always disliked all of his girlfriends and actually called them whores. I'm thinking there is something wrong going on and has been for a long time now. I don't know how much is illness or what. I guess she has been to therapists before, but, once they stop sympathizing with her "plight" she stops going. Thankfully she is in NC and we are in MA.
Thanksgiving was the first time I met her. My SO says she has always disliked all of his girlfriends and actually called them whores. I'm thinking there is something wrong going on and has been for a long time now. I don't know how much is illness or what. I guess she has been to therapists before, but, once they stop sympathizing with her "plight" she stops going. Thankfully she is in NC and we are in MA.
Does your SO know anything much about his mother's mental health history or just bits and pieces?
How did he react to all this?
Also, you said you left and then went home . . . MA is too far from NC to do that in an afternoon, lol. So did you go to another relative's house? Is there anyone else who knows more about your SO's mom and her mental health history? Ex husband? Aunts/Uncles? Siblings?
Does your SO know anything much about his mother's mental health history or just bits and pieces?
How did he react to all this?
Also, you said you left and then went home . . . MA is too far from NC to do that in an afternoon, lol. So did you go to another relative's house? Is there anyone else who knows more about your SO's mom and her mental health history? Ex husband? Aunts/Uncles? Siblings?
We drove straight 12 hours back to MA... From what I understand she has always been very narcissistic, needy and claiming victim. She has regular fights with her sisters and I guess with her mom when she was alive. She has been obsessed with a man in her church for ten years and sends him regular nasty letters about their relationship which never existed. She calls this mans current SO hags, and whores....
Make that your last visit, ever. S/O can go alone if he wishes to visit her. You don't need put up with that, illness or not.
Yes....I'm wondering how much a person puts up with even if there is mental illness. My aunt has a mentally handicapped 35 year old stepdaughter and she is taught about saying appropriate things.
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My poor SO is simply so upset about this, but, very very supportive of me.
