What do you think it's like for a boy who grew up without a mother? (girlfriend, father)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
There has been talk lately about boys who grew up without their father's and some effects that may have had on them, but I wonder what happens to boys who grow up without their mother? I know someone, but not well enough to ask them, whose mother died when he was 3 and he grew up with only his father. What do you think this boy experienced?
There has been talk lately about boys who grew up without their father's and some effects that may have had on them, but I wonder what happens to boys who grow up without their mother? I know someone, but not well enough to ask them, whose mother died when he was 3 and he grew up with only his father. What do you think this boy experienced?
You really would have to ask him, as only HE could tell us what HE experienced
In general, children without mothers miss out on some of the softer moments in life.
Not that dads aren't nurturing, but they do it differently, especially after the age of 9 or 10.
There has been talk lately about boys who grew up without their father's and some effects that may have had on them, but I wonder what happens to boys who grow up without their mother? I know someone, but not well enough to ask them, whose mother died when he was 3 and he grew up with only his father. What do you think this boy experienced?
No idea.
A loving household?
Imprisonment in the basement?
Something in between?
This should probably be in the non-romantic relationships forum or perhaps psychology
As I mentioned in t'other thread, I have an ex who is like this. His mom wasn't dead, but his parents divorced and she was stewardess, so not around a lot. He grew up with his dad and 2 older brothers.
He felt very un-parented, but I don't think that has to do with gender. He was left to fend for himself a lot, around the house, and didn't learn to do things like eat a balanced diet. (In contrast, my dad was a stay at home dad, and did all the cooking and cleaning, and I did not miss out on learning that stuff or feeling like I had a parent.)
He has close male friendships, which is part of what appealed to me when I met him. So many men I know have difficulty being emotionally close to other men, but he is not like that at all. He's not interested in men sexually (confirmed by experiment), but very committed to his friends.
He mostly dates women 10 years older than him. (This was a surprise to me.) He also told me, after we broke up, that his relationships tend to follow the same pattern his with me did -- he is very interested at first, and then after a few weeks or months becomes lukewarm / more of an FWB. He only called me his gf after I dumped him. I mean, ex-gf, then.
He seems to cheat a lot, but that may have other causes. It's so hard with human psychology, to sort out what has roots, where . But I think his lifetime pattern of emotionally deep, long-lasting connections with men, and shorter, more troubled relationships with women, might be related to not growing up with any women in the household. He doesn't think of women as an alien species (unlike, say, a PUA/MRA guy would), but he may fear connecting too deeply with them, counting on them.
It would be the same as not having a lot of women around him, mostly men.
These types of guys don't associate much with "softy" men or "ala fem" type men at all.
In many cases women seem to be put off by him and it.
It's not his fault, he's just doing what he is used to and living the way his fello "manly men" live.
For that matter, you can always spot a man who was raised by a single mother or spends a great deal of time around women. Either in the work place or after hours as 'friends' and whatnot.
He's watered down and less of a "man" because of it.
I don't know the answer to this as only someone that has experienced it would really know, and it might affect one person different than another. If nothing else I would not be surprised if a man like this had a harder time understanding women. It is hard enough for me to understand us that have been raised with by their mothers lol.
There has been talk lately about boys who grew up without their father's and some effects that may have had on them, but I wonder what happens to boys who grow up without their mother? I know someone, but not well enough to ask them, whose mother died when he was 3 and he grew up with only his father. What do you think this boy experienced?
The quality of that relationship, while it lasted, is very important - and he might well have little to no recollection of it. Humans don't 'remember' things until they have language skills to be able to articulate what they experience. If he had a loving mother, that is a very good thing for him and his ability to form and maintain opposite-sex relationships.
If his mother was not loving, i.e. was emotionally unavailable, and the two did not bond, that is not a good thing and he may have grown up deprived of the skills needed to successfully pursue relationships with women. The extreme variety of this type is prone to dreaming wistfully of having a relationship with a girl or woman, while being paralyzed to the point of inaction, i.e. he'll never make the first move even if he desperately wants to. This type is rare and is usually easy to recognize - no girlfriend, no experience, no life. In the worst case, he grew up with a big hole in his heart which over time only becomes harder to heal. This is especially true if he grew up without at least one sister. If he grew up with sisters, that experience will serve him well in relating to other girls and ultimately to women.
So this thread is certainly applicable to Relationships, even if it was moved here.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
