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This situation is only going to get worse. Apparently they have legal custody and he US legally adopted correct? The mother should not have any access to the child until she is mentally stabalized.
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Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
Sounds like she needs to be hospitalized.
No, they are not being harsh. The child's safety has to be a priority because he is defenseless. I don't know what psychological options they have tried for the birth mom, but she needs serious help.
Quote:
Originally Posted by willow wind
You can feel sorry for her if you like. Yes, she does not deserve what has happened to her. At the same time, she is too unstable to be around your brother, his family and her son. Resist the urge to make excuses for her because it only puts everyone else in danger. Try to deal with the here and now and in the here and now she needs to be kept away from her son and your brother's family. Her presence in their lives is and will continue to be a disaster.
NOthing more needs to be said about this. I feel sorry for the girl but she is obviously unstable and a possible threat to her bio son. When she does something really bad through her immaturity, instability or mood swings, it will be too late to be mindful of the childs welfare and not hers.
Help her to get help and let your family get on with raising the boy in a stable home. She doesn't need to be around him. It will only serve to confuse and embarrass him at some point.
The child's needs take precedence over everything else.
He must be protected, and if that means being isolated from the woman who birthed him, so be it.
So be it...yes...but designating the birth mother as trash...no. Big huge, for the love of God, no.
And the child might need some form of contact in their lives. This is a time tou have to feel your way through it. I trust his parents....but I don't discount the importance of his birth MOTHER
It is an interesting question ... what does one call the woman who gave birth to a child that has been adopted? As I mentioned before, I do not believe they are the "mom" ... that title goes to the person who cares for them day in and day out ... loving, laughing, scolding, healing, nurturing, etc.
I can almost accept birth "mother" because the formality of the term seems to distance the connection. But even that isn't correct, IMO.
The inappropriate snarky term I used earlier in the thread is wrong because it minimizes the role that she played in bringing that child to life. That role can't be denied, but it also doesn't guarantee any sort of relationship without the approval of the (adoptive) parents. And even if they allow a relationship, it's no longer a parental relationship.
I've seen all sorts of alternative names ... real mother, birth mother, biological mother, genetic mother ... all these terms still use the word "mother". I feel like there should be a term that recognizes her role in that child's story, but does not suggest a parental relationship.
We say "the woman who gave birth to me". As I said, we don't have any need to talk about her.
The woman who gave birth to our daughter does not need a title. A biological function does not confer a title. A relationship, or an accomplishment does that. Giving birth is neither.
The woman who gave birth to our did us a favor and did herself a favor. We hope the completed her education and went on to have a family of her own. We will respect her privacy, and we hope that despite the relaxed "flesh and blood" oriented tide that adoption seems to be taking now, well; our hope is that it stays that way. For the sanity and sake of all. Especially the child.
The woman who gave birth to me - is fine and accurate.
We say "the woman who gave birth to me". As I said, we don't have any need to talk about her.
The woman who gave birth to our daughter does not need a title. A biological function does not confer a title. A relationship, or an accomplishment does that. Giving birth is neither.
The woman who gave birth to our did us a favor and did herself a favor. We hope the completed her education and went on to have a family of her own. We will respect her privacy, and we hope that despite the relaxed "flesh and blood" oriented tide that adoption seems to be taking now, well; our hope is that it stays that way. For the sanity and sake of all. Especially the child.
The woman who gave birth to me - is fine and accurate.
There is no need for a title.
May God bless and care for your child. Good luck to you. Your views are antiquated, and frankly, sick.
May God bless and care for your child. Good luck to you. Your views are antiquated, and frankly, sick.
You need to stop being so judgmental. It's great that your position has worked for you, however it clearly doesn't work for everyone. You are not the grand authority on all adoptive situations.
You know extremely little about sheena's situation. Stop acting like you know better than she what her family should have done.
You need to stop being so judgmental. It's great that your position has worked for you, however it clearly doesn't work for everyone. You are not the grand authority on all adoptive situations.
You know extremely little about sheena's situation. Stop acting like you know better than she what her family should have done.
You need to go look at some of her posts, and pervious threads, and realize that the only person being judgmental is her. She spews hatred about birth parents who put their children up for adoption because of her stance on it. She's an adoptive mother and her biggest insecurity is, quite frankly, the scenario presented on this thread.
Please, read everything before you call someone out for passing judgement.
You need to go look at some of her posts, and pervious threads, and realize that the only person being judgmental is her. She spews hatred about birth parents who put their children up for adoption because of her stance on it. She's an adoptive mother and her biggest insecurity is, quite frankly, the scenario presented on this thread.
Please, read everything before you call someone out for passing judgement.
I've been going back and forth with HighFlying for a while. I feel comfortable calling her out for being judgmental.
We say "the woman who gave birth to me". As I said, we don't have any need to talk about her.
The woman who gave birth to our daughter does not need a title. A biological function does not confer a title. A relationship, or an accomplishment does that. Giving birth is neither.
The woman who gave birth to our did us a favor and did herself a favor. We hope the completed her education and went on to have a family of her own. We will respect her privacy, and we hope that despite the relaxed "flesh and blood" oriented tide that adoption seems to be taking now, well; our hope is that it stays that way. For the sanity and sake of all. Especially the child.
The woman who gave birth to me - is fine and accurate.
There is no need for a title.
It's actually quite sad to see the animosity and acrimony you have for people who put their children up for adoption, because of your own insecurities. Hopefully, someday you realize how immature and unfounded your feelings on this subject are.
I've been going back and forth with HighFlying for a while. I feel comfortable calling her out for being judgmental.
You can't call her judgemental about Sheena's comments, though. Like I said, you need to get some history here. Look at any thread/post she's made about adoption. It's always about bashing the american adoption system and/or biological parents.
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