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Thanks everyone! I appreciate the advice! It's hard because I do love partying with them. However, I can see that they are alcoholics because I only have a few drinks, and they can drink anyone under the table. It always seems to turn bad though because Chloe will start with Jim, and then they get into a vicious verbal fight, and people out in public are going to think differently, so the cops end up being called because they are so loud. I try to diffuse the situation as much as possible but she doesn't seem to listen. She loves drama, and stirring the pot, and I am not that way at all.
Jim is just as bad because he reacts to her BS. If I was him, I would go somewhere else, and ignore her to the fullest extent, but he always gets irate with her. I like them otherwise. They are cool when they are sober, or only have little to drink, but I feel a closeness with both of them, that I feel I can't cut them out. However, I do believe Jim when he says that Chloe "uses" and "manipulates" people. I can see that, but I do still care for her. Ever since she brought Jim around though it has been bad between me and her, because she thinks I like him more than her, and she thinks he likes me. He does, but like I said, I don't like anyone more than another person, I am a very fair person, who cares and loves everybody.
She still thinks I am more on Jim's side or whatever, and it hurts me because really I just don't want to be involved. I just want peace, and I want to be left out of it. That's another thing when Jim and her were fighting one time, I said nothing and walked away. I stayed out of it, and she kept fighting with me about the fact that I didn't "stick up for her", and she questions my "loyalty" after that. She also said I was a "bad friend" because I didn't say anything when her and Jim were fighting. Well, I am not going to get involved. Sorry, I am not in high school anymore where you "stick up" for your friends, and fight people. Nope! I am a peace maker, and it's not my drama, so I am going to walk away, but it pisses me off how she mentions that, all the time though. It's ridiculous, but I am torn.
OP, you've said that you like both Chloe and Jim, but you've not listed one single positive trait for either of them to counterbalance the shipload of negative characteristics. Honestly, if they are as bad as you make them out to be, I wouldn't want to be in the same county with them, much less be their drinking buddy.
Pardon my bluntness, but are you so hard-up for friends that you're willing to put up with their antics? Because I can assure you, if things are the way you say they are, no good can come of this. You would be well served to cut them off and find a better class of friends. At the very least, refuse to do anything with them where alcohol is involved. And if you find yourself scratching your head, trying to think of anything you've done together that didn't involve alcohol . . . well then, there's your answer right there.
OP, you've said that you like both Chloe and Jim, but you've not listed one single positive trait for either of them to counterbalance the shipload of negative characteristics. Honestly, if they are as bad as you make them out to be, I wouldn't want to be in the same county with them, much less be their drinking buddy.
Pardon my bluntness, but are you so hard-up for friends that you're willing to put up with their antics? Because I can assure you, if things are the way you say they are, no good can come of this. You would be well served to cut them off and find a better class of friends. At the very least, refuse to do anything with them where alcohol is involved. And if you find yourself scratching your head, trying to think of anything you've done together that didn't involve alcohol . . . well then, there's your answer right there.
Yes! Very good points! I agree! I am hard up for friends because I'm lonely, and don't have any, for real. It sucks but they are way to ****ed up. Thanks.
Yes! Very good points! I agree! I am hard up for friends because I'm lonely, and don't have any, for real. It sucks but they are way to ****ed up. Thanks.
My father gave me some wonderful advice, and while the context was getting mixed up in an unhappy dating relationship, it could apply to friendships as well. And here it is:
"It's better to be alone than wish you were."
Don't settle for second best (or, in Chloe and Jim's case, first worst). Allow yourself to consider yourself worthy of decent friendships, and you will find them.
OP, you've said that you like both Chloe and Jim, but you've not listed one single positive trait for either of them to counterbalance the shipload of negative characteristics. Honestly, if they are as bad as you make them out to be, I wouldn't want to be in the same county with them, much less be their drinking buddy.
Pardon my bluntness, but are you so hard-up for friends that you're willing to put up with their antics? Because I can assure you, if things are the way you say they are, no good can come of this. You would be well served to cut them off and find a better class of friends. At the very least, refuse to do anything with them where alcohol is involved. And if you find yourself scratching your head, trying to think of anything you've done together that didn't involve alcohol . . . well then, there's your answer right there.
I agree with this post. You might also want to think about what would happen to your record if the next time the police is called and you get arrested right along with them. They are not your friends... they are just drinking buddies and no good will ever come out of this friendship for you. They do not care about your feelings or well being. They are 25 and older and should be past the partying stage. Most adults are working and focusing on their futures not acting like 18-20 year olds.
My father gave me some wonderful advice, and while the context was getting mixed up in an unhappy dating relationship, it could apply to friendships as well. And here it is:
"It's better to be alone than wish you were."
Don't settle for second best (or, in Chloe and Jim's case, first worst). Allow yourself to consider yourself worthy of decent friendships, and you will find them.
Yes! Very good points! I agree! I am hard up for friends because I'm lonely, and don't have any, for real. It sucks but they are way to ****ed up. Thanks.
Having a couple of sort-of friends who behave badly in public will make it harder to find real friends...normal people will see you as part of that wild group and will steer clear of you.
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Very wise words.
