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It seems like there is no idea anyone has that's acceptable. She has an obvious mental problem. Just don't let her in and call the authorities if she comes around. You can't worry about how she feels about you at this point. I would consider no more than a stalker. You have tried, now wash your hands of her!
wow... She needs to be helped. She needs counselling and therapy, not dumped on streets. She cries because she has no options and she does not know how to help herself. She needs support, she needs advices, she needs to rebuild herself.
She is human being, a bit lost on the moment.
Trying is something else than setting days and lines, trying is sitting down together and speaking. What all things are stressing, what causes troubles, why she cannot do some things... When she can solve these things, rest of things goes on their place.
Masks off and warmly talking what happened and what she would need to get on her feet. It could be simple things like repeating rejection, it does not help if family is rejecting too. Needs digging inside why... Why, what, when, where, Who...
For example if she feels rejected she cannot see any future. Her world has gone smaller and smaller and she only has one room.
Even her own brother does not want or like her. How she could be a strong independent woman when she never taughted to be a one? When was the last time when she was accepted? Loved? Got positive feedback? Felt strong?
Why would be ok to dump someone when they most need help? Who are all those homeless people? They are someones kids, someones siblings etc. If she is not violent drug user but just rejected with low self esteem, how dare people leave her behind?
Dumped away from a family because she is not pretty, skinny and succesfull. Is that america? No wonder I always hated america So fake, so cold.
Restart
Take empty table, post it notes and clean and estimate situation piece by piece. What she is afraid of?
There is a SERIOUS distinction between "helping" and "enabling"...and from the description you have provided, it appears that you (virtue of where will she go) are taking an enabling approach. The sooner you stop feeling "responsible" for her, the quicker she will suck on to her next enabling victim.
It is NOT easy to do, but not healthy for any of you.
Half the population is out of work. How likely do you think it is that this woman will land a house sitting gig? (Hint: it's not going to happen)
Thats just ignorant. I have several friends who do this, and they have had no problem finding jobs. In fact they are booked for extended times. People go on vacation all the time, people have to leave for extended periods of time. Lots of people have pets they dont want to travel with. People just want someone to stay in their house and take care of things. You arent going to get rich doing it, but its better than nothing.
It seems like there is no idea anyone has that's acceptable. She has an obvious mental problem. Just don't let her in and call the authorities if she comes around. You can't worry about how she feels about you at this point. I would consider no more than a stalker. You have tried, now wash your hands of her!
What mental problem? She has coerced people she knows into supporting her without having to actually do anything. That looks like a pretty shrewd mind to me. Her parents no longer put up with her crap, but she found another willing victim in a brother. This sort of manipulative behavior is not uncommon, and is not a sign of mental illness.
Thats just ignorant. I have several friends who do this, and they have had no problem finding jobs. In fact they are booked for extended times. People go on vacation all the time, people have to leave for extended periods of time. Lots of people have pets they dont want to travel with. People just want someone to stay in their house and take care of things. You arent going to get rich doing it, but its better than nothing.
Someone that has never done it before, weighs over 300 pounds, and has no job is going to find a stranger to trust them with their house- for free?
Boy oh boy....this has changed for me... from a freeloader, jumping from free house to free house/ user I first thought she was
to a pitiful person in need of some real help!
As in, "Sis, we have a problem here...would you consider us finding some help
for you... to get you outta your depression and eating problem,(that no one has mentioned to you)?"
Some counseling could deal with the real issues...who knows the traumas
that lay inside her, poor thing!
Please ignore my earlier post thinking she was just some 'user'!!!
Mea culpa.
wow... She needs to be helped. She needs counselling and therapy, not dumped on streets. She cries because she has no options and she does not know how to help herself. She needs support, she needs advices, she needs to rebuild herself.
Let her come live with YOU!!
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So fake, so cold.
