Can a 12 year old boy play with a 9 year old girl? (PLEASE READ)

[JanND]

Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life

What do you mean, "he's pretty open about it?"

Getting an erection is "natural," but slapping your girl cousin's butt is NOT.

You need to voice your concerns to both their parents. The arrangement may need to change. And if you see them wrestling, redirect them immediately.

I agree. Their parents should know...and you should not have to shoulder this responsibility...it is too much, and too sensitive. Not talking to their parents would be something you'd regret if anything ever happened.
Your Dad's comment is inappropriate, sexist and worrisome.

As far as continuing to play with each other...I think they are beyond the age of physical playing...what you saw was pretty risky, and too risky to ignore imo....

And, this little girl is younger and more vulnerable...And...a person has to do what they can to prevent anything happening to either of them...so, since this 12 year old is prone to slapping this child's butt...inappropriate touching...my vote is No...they do not physically play like that at all.

It is a fine line...one doesn't want to over react...but you cannot un-ring that bell..you saw what you saw...and your gut instincts were right. This boy needs to understand that he cannot touch anyone that way...You, or his parents need to help him realize this for his own good. It is right of you to be concerned and trying to do the right thing.

[germaine2626]

Originally Posted by yandex

Are you really going to try to suggest that a 12 year old boy butt slapping a 9 year old girl is appropriate?

Originally Posted by Makhno75

It wouldn't have raised eyebrows in my neighborhood, but in the 1980s people were less psychotic about such things.

I was an elementary school teacher in the 1980s and I know for a fact that Children's Protective Services or the police , or both, would have been called if we saw that behavior.

Incidentally, in one case that I was aware of, it was discovered much later that the older brother who would slap his sister's butt & wrestle with her was not doing it innocently as he vehamitly claimed to his parents and others. He ended up in prison because it was discovered that he had sexually abused his younger sister, including intercourse, for years.

Perhaps butt slapping of younger, helpless little girls should have raised eyebroiws in your neighborhood.

PS. Obviously, butt slapping does not always lead to raping your sibling but it can become bullying or control or power or enjoying inflicting pain on smaller or helpless children. I wonder why this poster keeps saying that it is "normal" and other posters are over reacting?

[cyn7cyn]

Originally Posted by germaine2626

I was an elementary school teacher in the 1980s and I know for a fact that Children's Protective Services or the police , or both, would have been called if we saw that behavior.

Incidentally, in one case that I was aware of, it was discovered much later that the older brother who would slap his sister's butt & wrestle with her was not doing it innocently as he vehamitly claimed to his parents and others. He ended up in prison because it was discovered that he had sexually abused his younger sister, including intercourse, for years.

Perhaps butt slapping of younger, helpless little girls should have raised eyebroiws in your neighborhood.

PS. Obviously, butt slapping does not always lead to raping your sibling but it can become bullying or control or power or enjoying inflicting pain on smaller or helpless children. I wonder why this poster keeps saying that it is "normal" and other posters are over reacting?

I can't help but wonder about this post on several levels. First I'm aware we have several fetishists on here. Some try to covertly scratch their itch by instigating dialogue. Second, I don't know too many guys his age babysitting on a continual basis. There are even less that would consult an online forum about something as sensitive as this. Third is that out of all the dissenting viewpoints there is one, and one only poster who is implying that we should let the 9yr old decide if she likes it.

I don't know. Call me a skeptic on this one guys.