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As the child of a severly abusive mother, I should not have produced children and sorely regret that I did.
I was unable to nurture, my emotional range is extremely limited.
My 4 children were reared in an emotional void. I thought I was doing great because my own rearing was so bizarre and cruel, my frame of reference was warped.
Far better to have never had them. Had I realized earlier in life what I do now I would have just had rescue dogs.
As the child of a severly abusive mother, I should not have produced children and sorely regret that I did.
I was unable to nurture, my emotional range is extremely limited.
My 4 children were reared in an emotional void. I thought I was doing great because my own rearing was so bizarre and cruel, my frame of reference was warped.
Far better to have never had them. Had I realized earlier in life what I do now I would have just had rescue dogs.
How are they doing now? My mom was abused and wasn't as emotional as a lot of mother's but we all turned out ok and glad to be alive.
My feelings whether you regret having kids or not if you have them it is time to act like a responsible adult and love your kids and get over it. When I hear someone complain my heart goes out to the kids. It is a selfish attitude.
As the child of a severly abusive mother, I should not have produced children and sorely regret that I did.
I was unable to nurture, my emotional range is extremely limited.
My 4 children were reared in an emotional void. I thought I was doing great because my own rearing was so bizarre and cruel, my frame of reference was warped.
Far better to have never had them. Had I realized earlier in life what I do now I would have just had rescue dogs.
Wow, that's pretty intense. Are they doing alright now? Are you?
I was raised by a severely abusive mom and dad. Having children got me into intensive therapy because I just didn't know which way was up. I was going a great job compared to those two...but I had a lot of work to do. I'm not perfect, but I have made a ton of progress in parenting. It's an ongoing process.
They're all pretty much emotionally screwed, all have limited range of emotions, cold hearted, self centered.
As to be expected.
As for me no I am not and have never been OK, I am waaay screwed up.
Yeah, HFB, when your rearing is so abnormal (my mother was a true sadist) as to prevent normal development, you have such a skewed view of what is Ok.
I thought I was doing great because I never yelled and meant well. That was not enough by far.
My feelings whether you regret having kids or not if you have them it is time to act like a responsible adult and love your kids and get over it. When I hear someone complain my heart goes out to the kids. It is a selfish attitude.
Well no dip it's selfish, it's why some regret having them. You lose a lot of yourself. That's scary, painful, and irreconcilable to some.
It's a taboo subject. I have only known one woman in my life who after several drinks revealed to me that even though she has loved her daughter more than anything, if she was given another go at life she would refrain from having children.
I am not talking about men and women who didnt want to have kids from the start but were persuaded into it either by partners, or families; but about those who did want to have children yet parenthood has proven too much for them and disappointed them.
My parents adore my brother and I to death. We are ways going out to eat and they are amazing grandparents! They have helped my boyfriends, friends become happy and well adjusted too. Everyone I know loves them! They are just good Christian loving people. I love them and will take care of them until the end!
Actually the root cause of most divorces are money and sex
You have to go deeper. Money, sex, etc. are causes - kids are usually at the root of those causes, that's what a root cause is.
Pre kids, people have more money.
Pre kids, people have more sex.
When asked why one got a divorce, they say it was either money or sex but the root cause of that lack of money and sex is usually kids.
For most people and for the most part, life is more harmonious without kids. And that's with a normal kid. There are many who have kids that are difficult, very difficult. That changes the dynamic of a relationship.
My feelings whether you regret having kids or not if you have them it is time to act like a responsible adult and love your kids and get over it. When I hear someone complain my heart goes out to the kids. It is a selfish attitude.
It's not about having selfish attitude, it's about how you feel, you can't control your feelings.
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