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As parents ,we considered a college education as the ultimate gift we could offer our children. But, it sounds as though your parents are not footing the bill. So, while personally I would have felt my "gift" was rejected if my sons didn't graduate, your parents don't have that same investment. You have every right to choose your own path, since you are self-financing it. Tell your parents you have given it a lot of thought, and college is not the right way for you. Then, stop explaining and/or apologizing. You have earned the right to make that choice.
I guess I never thought of not having to explain. I get asked questions very often about things, and it'll probably take a lot for me to just tell them to mind their own business or tell them it doesn't need to be explained and a lot of ignoring after because my parent's just don't... stop.
Thank you Mattie, for be the only person to actually attempt to answer the original question and understanding the point of this post.
OP, you do not have "unconventional life plans". Lots of people work til they're too old, that's about as conventional as you can go. It doesn't sound like you have any ambitions (nothing wrong with that) which is going to turn off a lot of people because it sounds to them like you have no plans or imagination for your life. It's not going to be easy to explain this to your parents, but then again, it's your life, and you got to live it. I think when you do sit down with your parents, just accept that they're going to not like what they have to hear, don't argue or feel baited into defending your decision, lay down the facts and whatever ideas you're willing to share about your life. Know that they're going to want to hear a plan, even if it's something they don't like. Having some kind of a plan is better than no plans (and honestly, you sound more towards the latter, perhaps drum up more about the move to another city? ).
You guys posted as I was replying to Mattie, thank you guys too, for posting something relevant.
OP, you do not have "unconventional life plans". Lots of people work til they're too old, that's about as conventional as you can go. It doesn't sound like you have any ambitions (nothing wrong with that) which is going to turn off a lot of people because it sounds to them like you have no plans or imagination for your life.
This part actually makes me feel better because my dad acted like I was a freak just because I wanted to take time off when he thought I was going to go back.
And the ambitions part, basically, I kind of don't have any.
All I want is to have a job or two jobs that give me enough to pay rent and insurance and necessities while living in my desired location and get married and have no children.
I don't know if you can call the above ambitions since they're pretty basic, but I just don't really ask for much in life. I don't care about having power, a ton of money, making contributions to any field, or being well-known.
Tell them you still can't decide on a major/career and don't want to waste money/incur debt on something that you won't be using once you decide what you want to do, so you're going to stay away until you're sure about it.
Quote:
I don't know if you can call the above ambitions since they're pretty basic, but I just don't really ask for much in life. I don't care about having power, a ton of money, making contributions to any field, or being well-known.
Most people don't look for those things from a job. They look for interest and satisfaction.
This part actually makes me feel better because my dad acted like I was a freak just because I wanted to take time off when he thought I was going to go back.
And the ambitions part, basically, I kind of don't have any.
All I want is to have a job or two jobs that give me enough to pay rent and insurance and necessities while living in my desired location and get married and have no children.
I don't know if you can call the above ambitions since they're pretty basic, but I just don't really ask for much in life. I don't care about having power, a ton of money, making contributions to any field, or being well-known.
Your plan to live at home to save up money might get thwarted when you tell them you're not going to school, so you may need to prepare yourself to move out sooner than you think.
Tell them you still can't decide on a major/career and don't want to waste money/incur debt on something that you won't be using once you decide what you want to do, so you're going to stay away until you're sure about it.
Most people don't look for those things from a job. They look for interest and satisfaction.
I did and my dad is always like "You won't know until you try, like I did." ---But he took like 11 years to graduate and with his degree, it took 10+ years just to make $30K, and I'm pretty sure there are jobs that don't require degrees to make that much.
And yeah, the interest and satisfaction in a job just isn't me. When I go to work, I get in, do what needs to be done, and get out. I get interest and satisfaction out of just being where I want to be, location-wise. Even if crappy things happen.
Your plan to live at home to save up money might get thwarted when you tell them you're not going to school, so you may need to prepare yourself to move out sooner than you think.
My mom said she'd never kick me out for any reason, so I'm not worried about that one.
The only advice I would give is to have a sort of plan worked out you can tell them. If you were my daughter(?) my question would be, "Ok. So what are your plans going forward?".
The only advice I would give is to have a sort of plan worked out you can tell them. If you were my daughter(?) my question would be, "Ok. So what are your plans going forward?".
That's my issue. I don't know how to respond to that in a way that won't upset them. Like, I don't know how to word it and what parts of my plan to include and what can be left out for now. I know there is going to be some kind of explosion if I say I'm not going to go to college ever, cause there was a small one just over me "taking a year off."
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