"Good to see you" messages on Meetup (person, conversation, aging)

[MillennialUrbanist]

I've been in Meetup groups for about 5 years by now. Many are long-time groups, some I recently joined, and a few existed in the past but have since folded. I've always had good experiences with Meetup groups, whether to make real friendships or just fill my social calendar. Especially in the last year, now that most of my friends aren't single, and have a tendency to cocoon themselves in their relationships and stay home a lot.

Somewhere along the line, Meetup added a "good to see you" feature. It's exactly that: you can send a one-line "good to see you" message to someone you were happy to see. I'm pretty sure it was developed for someone you were happy to see again after having met them previously. But they evolved into "good to meet you" messages as well.

Ihad situations where I'd attend a Meetup, and talk to a lady in a newly joined group, or talk to a newly joined lady in an existing group, only to have her send me a "good to see you" message next day or even late same night (e.g. at 2:30 AM after an event that ended at 12:30 AM). When men, or women I already established casual friendships with, send those messages, there's no ambiguity, obviously.

Do those messages indicate romantic interest? I've heard ladies complain about men who sent "good to see you" messages to every lady in the group after attending their first meetup, even ladies they haven't talked to. So I'm leaning toward "no", or least know better than to do the same. I've sent those to women I was interested in, but try to avoid doing it too often, so I don't become "that guy". But then again, those "good to see you"'s are a relatively new feature, so their usage hasn't fully evolved yet.

Thoughts? What have your expereinces been?

[jade408]

Means nothing, meetup has made it pretty easy to automate this form of communication.

[jazzcat22]

Don't mean to burst your bubble, but Jade is right. It is technically possible that the sender of the "Good to See You" message just sent it to you, perhaps because she is romantically interested. But more than likely, it was sent to lots of other people on the Attended list. I've gotten them from people I never even met/spoke to. Yeah, maybe they did literally see me---but why in the world would they send the message when we hadn't even spoken? And the funniest thing is when someone indiscriminately goes down the list of those Attended and sends it to people who had signed up but never actually attended the event.

I suppose people do it because it's an easy way to feel like you have connected with someone, even if you hadn't. Too many people go to events and you wonder why since they won't say a word to anyone else. Maybe this kids them into thinking they participated more than they actually did---kind of someone automatically hitting "Like" for a Facebook post even for a post about someone's dog or aunt dying---and the person who hit Like probably couldn't tell you 5 minutes later what it was they liked.

If someone really wants to connect with you in a meaningful way after an event, they can click on your profile and send you an actual personal e-mail.

[MillennialUrbanist]

Originally Posted by jazzcat22

Don't mean to burst your bubble, but Jade is right. It is technically possible that the sender of the "Good to See You" message just sent it to you, perhaps because she is romantically interested. But more than likely, it was sent to lots of other people on the Attended list.
...
If someone really wants to connect with you in a meaningful way after an event, they can click on your profile and send you an actual personal e-mail.

You're right about this... but keep reading.

The reason I started this thread is that the "good to see you"'s carrying possible romantic interest generally came from women I've had real interactions with. Things like having a flirty (or meaningful) conversation, dancing with them, engaging in kino, getting compliments on something I did, etc. It's not uncommon for romantic interest to come out of those situations; correct me if I'm wrong. Also, in my groups, people who send "good to see you"'s en masse are usually event hosts, which kind of makes sense, them trying to make everyone feel welcome. Rank-and-file attendees usually don't do that.

Either way, I find them mildly flattering and try not to read more meaning into them that I would into, say, a handshake. But curiosity got the best of me; hence, this thread.

I also think that getting a Meetup message indicates higher odds of interest than a "good to see you". So that's what I usually do to show interest in a new lady. (They usually get an e-mail copy.) But again, I do it judiciously, to avoid getting labeled as "that guy". Especially if it's a group I have a good history with and being able to hang out with them with no awkwardness is more important than getting a date.

[beachie123]

i accidentally sent out a "good to see you" message to someone. i don't know what they thought of it since i never got any kind of response. but i now keep my white glove hand pointy thingie far away from that "good to see you" that is under everybody's name who attended something that i also attended.

[lottamoxie]

I wouldn't read anything into it. You could always send a message back to say 'thanks, hope to make the next event' as way of acknowledgement without sounding creepy.

[SouthernBelleInUtah]

In my meet up groups, the organizer of it sends one to everyone who showed up. Then we all do the same and send one to everyone else. Meaningless!

[imagineAA]

I have gotten those messages even when I didn't show up to the event.

I think of them as the Meetup equivalent to the Facebook poke. I imagine if someone is interested in dating you and too shy to ask you out, a "good to see you" might work.

When I host Meetup events, I sometimes do those just to be friendly and welcoming.

[jade408]

Reply back if you are interested but don't be shocked if you get no response. I didn't even realize I had private meetup messages till six months later. :P