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The whole case was dismissed he wasn't guilty of anything. His parents assumed because they had found weed previously that it must be true. But many kids smoke weed they are not criminals.
Actually according to the law they ARE criminals no matter what sort of spin and pretty words you want to use.
If they have marijuana they have broken the law, it is that simple.
As far as the parents go, the choice they make for their child is none of your business or the business of the rest of the family.
From what I understand anyone can post bail for anyone, there is no permission necessary from the parents so anyone in the family *could have* posted bail if they really wanted to.
As far as the case being *weak* and dismissed fine, he is not guilty according to the law however, he still had marijuana that his parents found so he is still guilty of breaking the law. There just was not enough evidence to convict him for this incident. He may not be so lucky the next time.
It is not the fault of his parents that he made the choices he did, he screwed up graduation, he screwed up the colleges he had chosen, he broke the law voluntarily, he is a criminal.
I have said about 3 times that the family made it clear they didn't want anyone to bail him out. Would could of all easily came up with the 500$. Its not that much money.
So everyone agreed that the parents were doing what was best for their kid.
If they did not, they would have bailed him out.
If his situation was so bad, they would have bailed him out.
If they thought he was so innocent, they would have bailed him out.
Seriously, why was every single person who knew this kid not willing to bail him out? After a few days? After a week? After a month?
What were they afraid of?
I think there is WAY more going on that you know....
I am just curious as this is a extended family issue and it doest personally affect me.
One of my younger family members was arrested on a drug charge. He told his parents he didn't do anything. Like most normal parents. His bail was set a 5,000 and his parents didn't post it. It would of cost about 500-700 to get a 5,000 dollar bond. His parents definitely had the money. They said they wanted to teach him a lesson and they didn't want anyone to bail him out either. They had found a bag of weed under his bed months ago (literally no bigger that a 20$ bag) and he must be selling to. Anyway as time went on the case was dismissed. The public defender was able to get the case thrown out so the case must of been very week in the first place since public defenders usually aren't very good. They were able to get video from outside of restaurant to show that the police statements of what occurred were false. He was held in jail in rikers island (a really terrible for anyone who doesn't know) for four months.
Anyway he is released from jail and refuses to go home. Won't speak to his parents because they didn't believe him. He moved in with our aunt. From what she said he said some pretty terrible things to them. I am sure he wont be able to graduate from H.S on time because he missed four months of school. That means he out of luck for whatever colleges he got into. This also made our last family functions very uncomfortable.
What would you do in this situation? Would you speak to your parents? If you were the parent would you do this?
I personally feel having a 20$ bag of weed is a huge jump from a drug dealer especially for a pretty decent kid with good grades.
Well, coming from Colorado where recreational weed is perfectly legal, I think the way this young man was treated is atrocious. I don't indulge myself, but I have any number of friends who do and when they smoke, they just get relaxed and mellow. It's a huge waste of taxpayer's money and the system's limited resources to put a kid in the slammer - especially rikers island - because his folk's wouldn't go his bail over a lousey $20 bag of pot. Now had it been meth or heavy duty opiates, the parents might have had good reason to worry, but still, in their place, I'd send him in for treatment not jail. The kid has every right to be angry with his parents. His future is at stake here. The punishment should fit the crime and his folks way over-reacted. I wouldn't be talking to them myself.
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Actually according to the law they ARE criminals no matter what sort of spin and pretty words you want to use.
If they have marijuana they have broken the law, it is that simple.
As far as the parents go, the choice they make for their child is none of your business or the business of the rest of the family.
From what I understand anyone can post bail for anyone, there is no permission necessary from the parents so anyone in the family *could have* posted bail if they really wanted to.
As far as the case being *weak* and dismissed fine, he is not guilty according to the law however, he still had marijuana that his parents found so he is still guilty of breaking the law. There just was not enough evidence to convict him for this incident. He may not be so lucky the next time.
It is not the fault of his parents that he made the choices he did, he screwed up graduation, he screwed up the colleges he had chosen, he broke the law voluntarily, he is a criminal.
That's true, but a 17-year-old who has alcohol is also a "criminal," but do you think a 17-year-old should go to Rikers Island for four months because of a few Bud Lights on a Saturday night? Spending the night in jail before the parents go and get him? Sure. Being on total lockdown at mom and dad's house until you move out? Sure. Spending four months in a very, very rough jail and missing out on graduating on time? No.
Well, coming from Colorado where recreational weed is perfectly legal, I think the way this young man was treated is atrocious. I don't indulge myself, but I have any number of friends who do and when they smoke, they just get relaxed and mellow. It's a huge waste of taxpayer's money and the system's limited resources to put a kid in the slammer - especially rikers island - because his folk's wouldn't go his bail over a lousey $20 bag of pot. Now had it been meth or heavy duty opiates, the parents might have had good reason to worry, but still, in their place, I'd send him in for treatment not jail. The kid has every right to be angry with his parents. His future is at stake here. The punishment should fit the crime and his folks way over-reacted. I wouldn't be talking to them myself.
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The parents didn't punish him, he did that all to himself, and it wasn't a $20 bag of pot. The OP hasn't said what the charges were, only that he was arrested on drug charges. Pot isn't legal in NY, so it really doesn't matter if it's legal in CO.
If I was his parent I would have bailed him out and he would have paid me back with interest. From the time of the bailout to the day in court he would be restricted to just leaving the house for work and school. I would not let my kid sit in Rikers Island for four months, missing school in the process.
That's true, but a 17-year-old who has alcohol is also a "criminal," but do you think a 17-year-old should go to Rikers Island for four months because of a few Bud Lights on a Saturday night? Spending the night in jail before the parents go and get him? Sure. Being on total lockdown at mom and dad's house until you move out? Sure. Spending four months in a very, very rough jail and missing out on graduating on time? No.
Well, coming from Colorado where recreational weed is perfectly legal, I think the way this young man was treated is atrocious. I don't indulge myself, but I have any number of friends who do and when they smoke, they just get relaxed and mellow. It's a huge waste of taxpayer's money and the system's limited resources to put a kid in the slammer - especially rikers island - because his folk's wouldn't go his bail over a lousey $20 bag of pot. Now had it been meth or heavy duty opiates, the parents might have had good reason to worry, but still, in their place, I'd send him in for treatment not jail. The kid has every right to be angry with his parents. His future is at stake here. The punishment should fit the crime and his folks way over-reacted. I wouldn't be talking to them myself.
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So what part of his future is his responsibility? He chose these things himself yet thinks his parents treated him wrong?
NO, if he he believes he is old enough to smoke pot or use whatever then he believes he is old enough to accept the responsibility and consequences for his own choices and actions.
So what part of his future is his responsibility? He chose these things himself yet thinks his parents treated him wrong?
NO, if he he believes he is old enough to smoke pot or use whatever then he believes he is old enough to accept the responsibility and consequences for his own choices and actions.
I agree. People, even teens, need to be responsible for their actions.
I'd never speak to my parents again as long as I lived. They'd be dead to me. I wouldn't even attend their funerals when they finally did actually die.
Honestly, I don't think I would have felt very warm and fuzzy toward the rest of the family, either. OK, yeah, the parents said "don't anyone bail him out." So what? If that was my cousin going through that, I'd have told the parents to sharpen both ends and stick it sideways, and then gone down and coughed up the 500 bucks. There's no reason at all the family couldn't have done that if they wanted to, and if I were that kid I wouldn't soon forget that.
Sounds like a pretty screwed up family all around to me. More like a bunch of relatives, as opposed to a real family.
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