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Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 25 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,360,802 times
Reputation: 5382
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My sister left a friend's house late into the night drunk as a skunk arriving at my sister-in-law's house upset over her marriage and babbling nonsense. Her husband was at home. She had been "partying" without him and crashed at my sister-in-law until early morning and left.
I know my sister and her husband had problems in the past. Her husband is a functioning alcoholic, recreational pot smoker. I have seen her husband get verbally abusive towards her in the past when they were younger. Since my sister and I aren't that close and don't really ever get together much, it makes it difficult for us to communicate and have a face-to-face discussion.
When my sister sobered up, she had no recollection of what happened the night before. I explained what happened and the things she mentioned about her marriage. She brushed it off like everything was fine between her and her husband. And I was like okay, well, if there is a serious issue consider seeking marital counseling instead of getting drunk and then driving around.
She typically doesn't drink very often but when she does, on occasion, it gets out of control
Not a thing you can do about this. It's up to your sister in law to not let your sister in if she shows up drunk. She can call the police and have her taken home or she can let her in. Her choice- yours too if she shows up at your house.
Your sister has already made it clear that she not going for counseling so all you can do is keep your fingers crossed that she doesn't harm herself or anyone else while she drives drunk. You can't fix your sister.
Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 25 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,360,802 times
Reputation: 5382
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flamingo13
you aren't close and don't know - not sure why the post?
We talk here and there usually through text. an occasional phone call or FB. We see each other maybe once a month
Quote:
Originally Posted by willow wind
Not a thing you can do about this. It's up to your sister in law to not let your sister in if she shows up drunk. She can call the police and have her taken home or she can let her in. Her choice- yours too if she shows up at your house.
Your sister has already made it clear that she not going for counseling so all you can do is keep your fingers crossed that she doesn't harm herself or anyone else while she drives drunk. You can't fix your sister.
Good point. It's up to her to fix the problems with her husband. I did tell her getting drunk over whatever problems they're going through like it will go away on its own isn't gonna help. She's the type of person to avoid conflict rather than deal with problem and seek a solution
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inkpoe
Where do you come in with all this? Were you also at your SIL's house?
My sister-in-law told me what had happened. I wasn't there. She wasn't too happy with her coming over in the wee hours of the morning crying drunk.
She may not even KNOW whats wrong. Sometimes just being drunk brings up strange unprovoked emotions in people.
I've seen a group af 4 drunk guys go from "It's all good" to brawling in the street (rolling around, not even landing punches) to "I love you; man!" & crying all in one night.
Who knows but she probably got mad at her husband, took off for a girls night & blew everything out of proportion.
Then, she sobers up & is like "What? What do you mean somethings wrong with me?"
Did you happen to mention to her how incredibly stupid , irresponsible and selfish her actions were? Driving drunk is horrendous and yet to you it seems secondary to her marital issues Who cares about that when she put lives in danger?
^
Not saying it's okay, but people drive intoxicated ALL THE TIME. Seriously.
OP, it's not your business, especially since it sounds like she doesn't want you in it, but you're trying to be a good sister and care for her, so I applaud that. Unfortunately, if she's been with the same jerk off for how ever long, I doubt it will change, and I doubt her view of her own life will change. But if it DOES, let her know you're there for her when that time comes. BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I wouldn't enable her by telling her it's okay and comforting her through the years, because if she continues to stay with him and be miserable, then it's not a big enough problem for everyone else to care.
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Who cares about that when she put lives in danger?
