Friend says she wants to get together but then makes an excuse each time? (spouse, person)
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We haven't hung out in almost 2 years. She would text me and post how much she missed me and we really have to make plans to get together so I'll ask her several times and she will make an excuse...all different things like I'll say we might go to a pizza place for dinner if you guys want to join and she will say something like we are having pizza next week....I'll invite her over and she says she'd love to but has to grocery shop...so I stopped reaching out...a few weeks ago she started up again posting how much she misses me and wants to get together so 3 times I asked her and she made an excuse....for instant I asked her to go to dinner with us and she said she went out to dinner last night....I noticed she had dinner right in my neighborhood. I've noticed that several times she is near and me never contacts me....only to say she "misses us" or "we need to get together in the next few weeks". I don't get it.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-15-2017 at 05:50 PM..
It seems she's making a show for everyone, of how much she misses you, but why? Why the charade? You can go ahead and take the wind out of her sails, by making a public post on her page.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-15-2017 at 05:40 PM..
Reason: No FB posts.
Location: Stuck on the East Coast, hoping to head West
4,640 posts, read 11,937,291 times
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I know someone who does this...I don't refer to her as a friend, though. I have no idea why she reaches out to me and then blows me off. Ultimately, I don't care. I run into her quite frequently and don't want things to be weird so I just repeat her words back to her.
For example, she just text me about a new restaurant and how we should go and she misses me. I text beck, not immediately, but eventually, and say, yeah, we should go. I miss you, too! And it's done. i think she thinks we're friends, but I sure don't.
That doesn't make any sense. It reminds me of people who over-shop, then go return it all the next day. I used to see that when I worked retail. It's like they want to make a show of spending, or in your case, making plans/having friends, but they don't want the substance. Weird.
We haven't hung out in almost 2 years. She would text me and post how much she missed me and we really have to make plans to get together so I'll ask her several times and she will make an excuse...all different things like I'll say we might go to a pizza place for dinner if you guys want to join and she will say something like we are having pizza next week....I'll invite her over and she says she'd love to but has to grocery shop...so I stopped reaching out...a few weeks ago she started up again posting how much she misses me and wants to get together so 3 times I asked her and she made an excuse....for instant I asked her to go to dinner with us and she said she went out to dinner last night....I noticedshe had dinner right in my neighborhood. I've noticed that several times she is near and me never contacts me....only to say she "misses us" or "we need to get together in the next few weeks". I don't get it.
She's an acquaintance who likes to give herself credit for reaching out, even though she never follows through on the offers. I'd leave her in your past and focus on your true friends.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-15-2017 at 05:42 PM..
[quote=jojo775;47161406]We haven't hung out in almost 2 years. She would text me and post how much she missed me and we really have to make plans to get together so I'll ask her several times and she will make an excuse...all different things like I'll say we might go to a pizza place for dinner if you guys want to join and she will say something like we are having pizza next week....I'll invite her over and she says she'd love to but has to grocery shop...so I stopped reaching out...a few weeks ago she started up again posting how much she misses me and wants to get together so 3 times I asked her and she made an excuse....for instant I asked her to go to dinner with us and she said she went out to dinner last night....I noticed she had dinner right in my neighborhood. I've noticed that several times she is near and me never contacts me....only to say she "misses us" or "we need to get together in the next few weeks". I don't get it.[/QUOTE<iframe width="781" height="439" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/bo2Q5OYorSM" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
How old are you? I don't get the texting and the posts, clearly you live near each other. Although I think it's pretty clear she really doesn't want to bothered, and isn't really a friend.
But how about picking up the phone(you can actually make calls on them) and talk to her live. You can tell by the voice(something you can't tell in a text by her tone and if she hesitates if she really had any interest or not in socializing. That would have solved this much sooner.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-15-2017 at 05:51 PM..
Reason: deleted the FB comments..See sticky post
You mentioned "us". Is the other person your spouse? Maybe she only wants to see you. Have you tried making plans one on one to see if that works better?
We haven't hung out in almost 2 years. She would text me and post how much she missed me and we really have to make plans to get together so I'll ask her several times and she will make an excuse...all different things like I'll say we might go to a pizza place for dinner if you guys want to join and she will say something like we are having pizza next week....I'll invite her over and she says she'd love to but has to grocery shop...so I stopped reaching out...a few weeks ago she started up again posting how much she misses me and wants to get together so 3 times I asked her and she made an excuse....for instant I asked her to go to dinner with us and she said she went out to dinner last night....I noticed she had dinner right in my neighborhood. I've noticed that several times she is near and me never contacts me....only to say she "misses us" or "we need to get together in the next few weeks". I don't get it.
I have family members who do that. I stopped making an effort because of it.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-15-2017 at 05:44 PM..
She's an acquaintance who likes to give herself credit for reaching out, even though she never follows through on the offers. I'd leave her in your past and focus on your true friends.
in a nutshell^^
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