Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
It's great seeing that I am getting some support. The sad thing is the women here saying "I just have more guy friends" in reality have their own internalized misogyny that makes them not be good friends with other women. We need to come together and combat the patriarchy which causes just this sort of thing. .
You are saying that men cause women to hate each other. I disagree one-hundred percent. Women need to stop blaming men for all their shortcomings and failures.
Women hate other women because they choose to do so. They can't blame their hatred on someone else.
Really! "The enemy"? I wouldn't vote for someone for president just because I'm a woman and she's a woman (I would hope no thinking person would), and I won't befriend someone just because I'm a woman and she's a woman. You either share interests and click or you don't.
True.
Bottom line is, I'm going to be friends with whoever makes me feel good. I'm not going to remain in a friendship with someone just because she is a woman like me. I had to get rid of a lot of women friends who carped, criticized and judged me - my clothing, hair, makeup, what I ate or didn't eat, how I spent money. They just made me feel bad about myself all the time. They are gone now and I'm glad! I don't miss them at all. Good riddance. I owe nobody an apology for who I choose to be friends with.
I apologize if this is not the right forum to say this, but it is something that I and I am sure many others have noticed. Namely women that say "I don't really have a lot of girlfriends because I don't get along with other women" "I am not like other girls (as if other girls are somehow "bad")" "I have lots more guy friends than girlfriends" etc. etc. ad nauseum.
It's really sad. For one most do it just to look "cool" for guys, then internalize it and blow off other women even though they could be great friends! It's fine to have guys as friends, but as a general rule it works better if the friends women have are more women than men, to me if I meet a woman that says any of the above or has more guy friends I don't trust her.
Not to get political, but we live in an age where women more than ever should be helping and supporting each other, we should always support other women and come together in sisterhood. Yet it's really sad how so many feel it's a kind of badge of honor to say "I'm not like other girls/women". Anyone else feel the same?
All of this is purely your opinion and matters to you alone. Many women have never had a lot of female friends for various reasons and if you do not trust someone just because of their lack of female friends that is your issue alone and you should consider professional guidance to resolve this issue.
It also is not your choice who is friends with whom and you have no idea if anyone
*comes together in sisterhood*, personally I do not have any biological sisters but I do have female friends.
I apologize if this is not the right forum to say this, but it is something that I and I am sure many others have noticed. Namely women that say "I don't really have a lot of girlfriends because I don't get along with other women" "I am not like other girls (as if other girls are somehow "bad")" "I have lots more guy friends than girlfriends" etc. etc. ad nauseum.
It's really sad. For one most do it just to look "cool" for guys, then internalize it and blow off other women even though they could be great friends! It's fine to have guys as friends, but as a general rule it works better if the friends women have are more women than men, to me if I meet a woman that says any of the above or has more guy friends I don't trust her.
Not to get political, but we live in an age where women more than ever should be helping and supporting each other, we should always support other women and come together in sisterhood. Yet it's really sad how so many feel it's a kind of badge of honor to say "I'm not like other girls/women". Anyone else feel the same?
I'm pushing 70 now.. but most of my life I have had loads of acquaintances/ coworkers..got along with most all..
BUT what one considers true friends.. another story. I found that taking the time to consider whomever you interact with and it does take a lot of time.. Fair weather friends become obvious. True friends stick with you..and also speak honestly and forthcoming when they disagree.. but don't bail on you.. IF you cannot take constructive criticism from a true friend I would look inward at yourself.. because just sometimes.. you (me) need that reality check.. Human's can make wrong decisions all the time..but to deny a good friends opinion ( when asked for) and you get your nose out of joint says more about ones-self !
Chose friends wisely, never rely on fair-weather friends.. Even your own children can be hunky dory with you as long as you bail them out or condone bad things... then all of a sudden even they will become distant!
It's human nature to want to be supported .. whenever one wants it.. BUT it's more important to understand TRUE friends will call you out.. will never condone some decisions you make... Even then they will still care but will never make excuses nor give one ability to say... My friends know I did the right thing.. and it's so and so that did this that and the other thing...
In short.. encourage engagement with others.. male or female.. But never throw your hopes and dreams into these people until you have it proven to you.. Connected and bonded... Proof and validation takes along time~~ Most don't have the patience..Instant gratifications seems to be how most judge others these days!!
First, I am male, age 72. Second, I am heartened and so glad to see so many women reject the OP's contention that we males are the "enemy". The vast majority of female posters in this thread so far have demonstrated common sense and good will toward others. The militant haters have been a distinct minority. This thread has left me with a positive feeling. When I first read the original post I thought to myself, "Uh oh, this is going to be rough sledding!."
Perhaps I don't belong in this thread at all, as it was addressed to you ladies. But from this observer comes a "well done!", not that you would particularly care what I think, but I share it anyway.
It also is not your choice who is friends with whom and you have no idea if anyone
*comes together in sisterhood*, personally I do not have any biological sisters but I do have female friends.
This is a great comment. We certainly can't dictate to other people who they should or should not be friends with. It is their business only.
I had a girl friend in college who liked hunting, fishing and sports (football). She tried to make friends with other women, but many of them weren't interested in the same things she was, and they were even cruel to her. They gossiped about her behind her back, and got her kicked off the cheerleading team. Once she got married, she found a man with the same interests that she had, and she said her husband was her best friend. And that's okay. It's actually a great thing.
My girl friend for the last three years does not like hanging out with other women. She does probably because she needs that connection. But only in small doses. Most of her good friends are guys at least 10 years older than her. But she gets so annoyed and upset by women's behavior. She always comes home upset that they are so into their boyfriends or they are way too emotional or they can't support themselves or they spend too much money or they can't budget. Or they are so concerned about this relationship or that and can't get over things. They spend so much time talking about their family and how they look and what they need to wear. She's still a wonderful woman inside but she craves independence and most women aren't like that. She grew up as the only female amongst five brothers and a dad. Mom died early. Love her because she is a woman with all of the great guy traits. Some days I think she is more of a guy than me and nothing close to a lesbian. I've only gone out with women that are a lot guy inside. We totally get along.
Amen. Long friendships are the best and I crave the occassional but intense beatings I take about what I need to change. Love women that love men, not just me. But women that love how men are. Using tools and and making ends meet efficiently and without too many material needs. Independence. Nice thing is even when you get older younger women that actually like men like you even more. I'm sixty and my girlfriend is 32 and any female friends I have are definitely less than 40. Get along so well with my daughters friends in mid 20s. Maybe there is a cool 60 year old female out there but I am sure she has already been snatched by someone else. Women that are men lovers are pure gold. Not many but still not hard to find. Love em.
My youngest daughter that is 25 has been traveling all over the world for the last 3 years. Alone. Yep you heard that right. On her own dime. been in Vietnam for the last month. She just hit her 26th country. She also has a hard time with women. Women that are super independent just don't like other women. That's my take. Because women tend to be needy. I hate to generalize. I only hang out with women that don't need me.When I know they are not after my income or looking for security I am so relaxed. Any woman that needs me is instantly checked off the list of friends. Has to be equal. Can just say whatever.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
