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Quote: But I've encountered a few nosy people who just seemed really desperate to find out how much money I earn or my husband earns. I do transcription work out of my home and it's supplemental income, so I had someone ask me recently what I earn doing this and I told her, I'd rather not say. End quote.
I've done transcription work too, and have had people ask what I made and wanted do it, also, usually for the wrong reasons, in my opinion--usually a mother with young children just wanting to stay home (takes a lot of discipline and cooperation from older children or a spouse) and make some money. It's still a JOB--an employer (even if you are self-employed) expects you to work a certain number of hours and produce actual work!
The most ridiculous thing anyone asked me was "Can you make money doing that?" Yeeesss, I'm supporting myself with no other income, but that was as far as I would humor them and would try to change the subject, often with limited success. I've also started saying, "I'd rather not say," about many nosy inquiries, including what I paid for various items, because people nowadays think no question is off limits.
The reason I'm not posting this on the work board is because I am asking this question from a social perspective. In social situations, when has it ever been okay to ask someone how much money they make? I was always taught that was impolite to ask, especially if you don't know someone very well. I've been appalled at meeting people for the first time, and they ask how much I make or my husband makes at his job. Why do people do this? If they are curious about the salary for a certain occupation, they could get a general idea by doing a google search for salaries in their local area for that particular occupation.
Being in gov't, people get by with "what are you? GS what?" The pay rate of a position is fairly common knowledge and the dollar amount is published online. The level within that grade is the unknown but it still gets asked anyway.
It would be different if someone were shopping for a career and asking a general baseline starting salary.
Boorish behavior. Has no place in polite society. (Polite Society is almost an oxymoron these days)
I think it's rude. I have a nosy friend who kept trying to find out lol. She would say, "Oh, I saw a job advertised that looked like something you might be interested in, but I don't know if it's good for you because I don't know how much money you make." Then she would stare at me expectantly. I would just change the subject.
She tells me what her son and all her friends make, with commentary on how she thinks they should be spending it or not spending it. I make more than any of them. No way will I EVER tell her!
I know people like this, and I do consider it rude. Some people are obsessed with other's money. They love to point out how much this one or that one makes, making anyone who earns less feel inadequate. That is not considerate of other people's feelings. Must we all get into a conversation of earnings contest, all the way up to William Buffett? It projects envy, in my opinion.
Not now but in high school I knew this guy who was obsessed with money and status. He once asked why my mother was driving an older car and if we were low class people. Really even as teenagers, it stunned me.
Asking someone how much money they make is the height of rudeness.
If anyone asked me for my salary I would tell them it was none of their business - and, depending on my mood, I may even tell them to go screw themselves.
The reason I'm not posting this on the work board is because I am asking this question from a social perspective. In social situations, when has it ever been okay to ask someone how much money they make?
Is this a thing to discuss in Europe? Because I know a lot of people in the UK and not one of them discusses salary.
My friend's husband is a Brit who worked in my department when he came to NYC some years ago. He told her that he was shocked when he first met Americans because they asked such personal questions as "What do you do for a living" and "What town do you live in", things we don't think are really personal questions but in other cultures might be used to make judgments.
Not now but in high school I knew this guy who was obsessed with money and status. He once asked why my mother was driving an older car and if we were low class people. Really even as teenagers, it stunned me.
It was very rude and nosy.
I have friends who encountered a similar situation. They came from a town that when we were kids had been a small town with a hickish feel. There were horse farms and lots of blue collar workers. Over a short number of years, it turned around and became an affluent NYC bedroom community. The father in this family had a landscaping business. They moved to my town, which was more low-key, when the kids were in school and started getting "Your father cuts our lawn" sneers from the wealthier kids.
Last edited by Mightyqueen801; 02-19-2017 at 07:35 PM..
I know people like this, and I do consider it rude. Some people are obsessed with other's money. They love to point out how much this one or that one makes, making anyone who earns less feel inadequate. That is not considerate of other people's feelings. Must we all get into a conversation of earnings contest, all the way up to Warren Buffett? It projects envy, in my opinion.
This woman couldn't make me feel inadequate, but I just know she talks too much about everyone to everyone, plus she makes judgments like "why can't Susan and her husband just buy a new car when I KNOW she inherited stocks from her father..." Because it's none of your business, that's why.
She would have a heart attack if she knew what I still have to pay off for my daughter's college, too.
People make judgments about that sort of thing, as well. None.Of.Your.Business.
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Yeeesss, I'm supporting myself with no other income, but that was as far as I would humor them and would try to change the subject, often with limited success. I've also started saying, "I'd rather not say," about many nosy inquiries, including what I paid for various items, because people nowadays think no question is off limits.
