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I don't think free tickets should be part of the equation.
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It's like being an escort. If both parties are agreeable to the arrangement, that is fine. I served as the date for a gay guy in college who didn't want people to know he was gay, and he paid for them, but he was my friend, and would have been my friend if he didn't take me anywhere, so I can partially relate but not totally.
If I don't want to spend time with someone I'm not going to for free dinners, shows, anything. The looks of the person has nothing to do with it. I wouldn't go out with a hot hot guy whom I didn't like for free shows, ski trips, anything.
I might feel a bit sorry for the guy just because for some reason he feels he has to buy friendship. Real friends would not allow that but it is probable he has only had false user friends so I am not sure I blame him.
Of course .. if he was a nice guy, intelligent, interesting, hopefully funny .. I would 'hang out' with him (but NOT to get free tickets - just because he is who he is) .. though since I am 67 and I imagine he is considerably younger than that, I doubt we would spend too much time at that.
I am not critical of my friends' appearance. If I like their company and we have enough in common, we can be friends.
If I am friends with this older man and he wants to share concerts with me, that's fine. But for every concert he pays for, I pay for something else. I pay for dinner that night, or I cook him a home made meal, or I babysit his cat while he goes on business trips. There is give and take in a friendship, not just take.
If I do not enjoy this man as a friend, then I do not go to shows with him. I don't use people or deliberately deceive them. I can't even imagine spending 3-4 hours with someone I don't like just to get a free concert.
Hey OP, did you try telling him you don't really like him to see if he still wants to give you concert tickets? Or do you pretend to enjoy his company just to get free shows.
I have noticed something over my 85 years, that some of the best looking women, are married to some not so good looking guys.
One young woman I knew years ago was not a 10 but a 12 she was so good looking. Her husband was a very plain guy. I heard another woman ask her one time, why as she was so hot, did she marry her husband.
Her answer was: He may not be the best looking guy in town, and there were a lot of young men that wanted to marry me. I chose my husband not because of his looks, but he was the smartest man I knew, and the kindest most loving man in the world. He made those hot men as you call them look like something tracked in on my shoe. On one else would ever treat me as well and kind and loving as he does. He is the best father, any child could ever have. He will never cheat on me with another woman. We can sit and hold an intelligent conversation. When we married we did not have a pot to P*** in, and I had to work the first couple of years before the children came. But by the time we had been married 4 years, he had used his brains and he could buy and sell any of those men you are all married to. People look up to him and call him sir, with great respect. In turn they give me the same respect they give him. He is comfortable at the opera, at plays, at concerts, and can speak before 2,000 people and they listen to what he says and try to learn.
I can be proud of my husband for what he is, not because he looks like a movie star. He knows how I feel about him, and I will never cheat on him. I love him for the man he is, not because he looks like a movie star. (She was sitting with 6 other women her age or a little older. All beautiful well built women. Then she put them in their place.) And in addition I live in a home none of you will ever afford in your lifetime and it is paid for. And I am the only one in this group that can pick up the check for all of us, without having to worry about it hurting my budget. For me it is chicken feed, and our husbands all started out at the bottom when we married. (With that she picked up the check and left to pay the bill.)
I have never forgotten that woman's speech. I knew them for years. He was not ugly, or anything, just not good enough looking to get any of the others to even look at him. As she said, it is not looks that matter, that is the least important factor. He ended up owning about half the town, he was so successful in life.
I have noticed something over my 85 years, that some of the best looking women, are married to some not so good looking guys.
One young woman I knew years ago was not a 10 but a 12 she was so good looking. Her husband was a very plain guy. I heard another woman ask her one time, why as she was so hot, did she marry her husband.
Her answer was: He may not be the best looking guy in town, and there were a lot of young men that wanted to marry me. I chose my husband not because of his looks, but he was the smartest man I knew, and the kindest most loving man in the world. He made those hot men as you call them look like something tracked in on my shoe. On one else would ever treat me as well and kind and loving as he does. He is the best father, any child could ever have. He will never cheat on me with another woman. We can sit and hold an intelligent conversation. When we married we did not have a pot to P*** in, and I had to work the first couple of years before the children came. But by the time we had been married 4 years, he had used his brains and he could buy and sell any of those men you are all married to. People look up to him and call him sir, with great respect. In turn they give me the same respect they give him. He is comfortable at the opera, at plays, at concerts, and can speak before 2,000 people and they listen to what he says and try to learn.
I can be proud of my husband for what he is, not because he looks like a movie star. He knows how I feel about him, and I will never cheat on him. I love him for the man he is, not because he looks like a movie star. (She was sitting with 6 other women her age or a little older. All beautiful well built women. Then she put them in their place.) And in addition I live in a home none of you will ever afford in your lifetime and it is paid for. And I am the only one in this group that can pick up the check for all of us, without having to worry about it hurting my budget. For me it is chicken feed, and our husbands all started out at the bottom when we married. (With that she picked up the check and left to pay the bill.)
I have never forgotten that woman's speech. I knew them for years. He was not ugly, or anything, just not good enough looking to get any of the others to even look at him. As she said, it is not looks that matter, that is the least important factor. He ended up owning about half the town, he was so successful in life.
Thanks for sharing this story-----but career success/money does seem to be part of the equation, as it does with so many men who aren't considered good looking but who are famous and/or rich. Even in 2017, women still look for good providers. There are many wealthy guys who wouldn't get the woman/women they get were they not rich.
And how awful that the first woman asked the wife why she married her husband. She needs to censor herself a little more. And how awful that the wife couldn't have just talked about love and her husband being a great husband. All the bragging about her wealth tells me she may have been gorgeous on the outside, but the interior needs a little more work.
Know something? I'm 63 and I've never put anyone "in their place." People have said things to me that were rude and insulting, but I never felt I had retaliate. I hope I get through the rest of my life in this manner, even though I want to work more on being assertive and protecting myself I still want to do it without hurting someone else.
If I'm not screwing them, I don't care what my friends look like. If I had a buddy who wanted a concert partner and I liked the band, I'd be happy to join. What kind of psycho would you have to be to refuse if you actually called that person "friend"?
Let's say you have an extremely unattractive friend who is always offering free tickets to shows. While this person doesn't smell, he has bright red skin, pock-marks, is 15 years older, overweight and spits on you when he talks. However, he's nice, helpful, lonely and loquacious. Seating is prime and he's always hooked-up for sold out shows. Could you comfortably go out with said person just as a friend?
I can comfortably say that I would not hang out with someone like yourself, who considers how someone else looks to be the deciding factor in whether or not I spend time with them.
The OP asks if using other people only for personal monetary gain is OK? We used to call those kind of people gold diggers or gigolos.
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