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I disagree! As the saying goes, "Where there's life there's hope." When my parents and I reopened communications they were far more pleasant than they had been in the past and we achieved peace. Before my father died he and I actually became friends for the first time in my 45 years (I'm now 70) and I treasure our many conversations. They were worth waiting for. Both he and my mother got to see their last grandchild, an infant granddaughter. To have missed those times would have been a great loss to me and to them.
As for what I bolded above, they may not be great mothers and/or fathers as we would like but they are still one's parents and they are inextricably linked to one. That can't reasonably be denied. People CAN change! Reconciliation CAN occur And what a travesty it would be to miss out on the potential positives. There is something to be said for being able to forever after look back and honestly say, "No regrets!"
My parents weren't great but while I didn't always like them I never stopped loving them. For good or for ill, they WE'RE my mother and father; a biological fact that cannot be denied no matter how hard you work to do so. I also respected them for the admirable things about them and there were a number of them. Sometimes you may have to look for them however.
That is great in your case but there are many times when happy endings don't exist.
That is great in your case but there are many times when happy endings don't exist.
I quite agree. I have a 10.5-year younger brother who hated our parents to the bitter end and couldn't wait for them to die. He won't have a thing to do with me because I look very much like our father and sound just like him. My brother's a very fragile individual. Some of us are just more resilient than others.
Last edited by Curmudgeon; 03-11-2017 at 05:42 PM..
If they are on a limited budget have them go thru the federal govt for safe phones.
As for the animosity, own it and then work on dicipating it. I am not nieve enough to think parents are pure and without fault. We each have major flaws.
For those that are bold enough to divorce your heritage..Good for you. Bad for society...
You're not a kid anymore. Quit thinking like one, and you definitely shouldn't act like one.
Well I read other of your posts clarifying, because it did make no sense. I looked back at the email I wrote (and didn't send) and I actually didn't use a single swear word. I used that more as the sentiment, not as an actual literal translation.
Plus in my house...only adults are allowed to swear
I have a parent like that but we are afraid of her. She is dangerous. No, I wouldn't pay for her cell phone bill. And no, I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of receiving any email of that nature from me. People that are that bad do not react as normal. Speaking for my mother, she'd adore an email of such and relish that she got me upset.
Thanks for this. This person used to be dangerous, but isn't in their old age. The worst would just be the gossip and that is going to happen no matter what I do. Good reminder....don't give any ammunition.
I wrote a letter also. It felt great! You need to step back as it's a toxic relationship. If you decide to keep in contact you NEED to disconnect the phone or at least stop paying for it! Once someone takes advantage they always will, not just with the phone but also in other ways!
Because the account holder allows it. There are parental restrictions that can be put on phones to limit purchases, data, texts, and voice calls. I don't know why anyone wouldn't use these features instead of paying hundreds of dollars extra each month.
This was a while ago when parental controls didn't cover much besides phone numbers they could call out and times of day that could be used (I had them on my teens phones).
It was also before data was so cheep, as were international and minutes were unlimited. It only went on for a few months and I cut it all off because of several issues with them taking advantage. I used the numbers to demonstrate the bills were 10x (or more) what I expected. I called and asked for explanations every time, until the last. There were always excuses (including absurd ones a teen would give) and they didn't seem to think there was anything wrong with their actions. They still don't.
This was a while ago when parental controls didn't cover much besides phone numbers they could call out and times of day that could be used (I had them on my teens phones).
Sorry, I thought it was something recent, not from 15-20 years ago.
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