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Another thing is pets get confused when they are put away for punishment AND when people visit, AND when it is bedtime. Over time I guess they can differentiate between the 3 though.....maybe.
Lol yeah i get irritated when my mom has her and her 4 kids stop on by. They are a rowdy bunch and it seems so weird that theyre afraid of a friendly golden retriever. We constantly have kids want to stop and pet him all the time...yet we have to put him away when this group comes around. I could just keep him out and let them all deal...but then that makes me the mean lady with the scary dog I guess. I just want to tell the kid to get it together...but i wont do that either. The mother's reaction is strange also i think...she must really want to get out of the house to continue to come over to these events. She is nice, more of an acquaintance. Her kids dont behave that well..but there are 4 of them and she just seems to let them do what they want.
My only concern for you letting the dog out is what if the kids do something: pull his tail, or yank on his ear and he does bite? I know, I know your dog never bites but leaving kids unsupervised with any dog, big or small can result in a bite and a big lawsuit for the owner. In some cases the owner is forced to euthanize their beloved dog. It's just not worth it.
I think if it were me I would just tell this mother "I'm sorry but if your children are so afraid of my dog, perhaps you guys shouldn't come over anymore. And by the way there are some steps you can take to help them get over their fear".
For me the only solution would be not to have these people in my house. It's not like they are your best friends or something of that nature. You have a good reason to keep them away, just tell them you are not going to lock up your dog any longer and if that's a problem they should stop visiting you.
I wonder if the kid is exerting her power knowing you and everyone else are bending over backwards to please her. She seems to be okay with your grandmother's dog unless they have to lock him up too.
The world is full of dogs. People are not going to lock them up or keep them home because one child makes a fuss when she sees them. Maybe the girl should be seeing a therapist if the fear really is that real.
Will you please address the issue of WHY your mother keeps inviting people to your house without your permission? Clearly you don't like this woman and her kids, so why are they coming over to your house often enough for this to even be an issue?
You are not an innocent victim in this situation.
I agree.
Why haven't you told your mother to stop inviting her friends to your house. And, it doesn't even sound like they are actually her friends but the adult daughter and grandchildren of a friend.
I can not even imagine inviting the adult child & their children of one of my friends to a party at one of my children's homes. Let alone doing it multiple times over a two year period.
Talk to your mother and stop the madness! Call your mother today and tell her.
Why haven't you told your mother to stop inviting her friends to your house. And, it doesn't even sound like they are actually her friends but the adult daughter and grandchildren of a friend.
I can not even imagine inviting the adult child & their children of one of my friends to a party at one of my children's homes. Let alone doing it multiple times over a two year period.
Talk to your mother and stop the madness! Call your mother today and tell her.
My only concern for you letting the dog out is what if the kids do something: pull his tail, or yank on his ear and he does bite? I know, I know your dog never bites but leaving kids unsupervised with any dog, big or small can result in a bite and a big lawsuit for the owner. In some cases the owner is forced to euthanize their beloved dog. It's just not worth it.
My best friend of nearly 20 years is a HUGE dog-lover. From a family of huge dog-lovers. Seriously, she's the most dog-loving person I know. When she had kids she NEVER left her babies and toddlers alone in the room with the dogs. She said even the most well-intentioned, beloved, well-trained dog is still, in his DNA, a dog, an animal. And all animals act out of instinct at times.
Another story. One of my kids was bitten on a play-date. By the sweet family pup. The hostess and I were standing in the living room talking. She was holding the dog on a leash. Two of the kids rounded the sofa on their way to the backyard and the dog bolted up and bit my child on the chest. He was hurt, bleeding, understandably shaken. Thankfully he was ok--just required bandaging--no ER visit. Still has the scar, though. I didn't feel anyone was "at fault": that mom had the dog on a leash, the kids were playing like normal kids, and the dog was just being a dog--he was young and excitable and most likely trying to protect "his people."
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Originally Posted by chiluvr1228
I think if it were me I would just tell this mother "I'm sorry but if your children are so afraid of my dog, perhaps you guys shouldn't come over anymore. And by the way there are some steps you can take to help them get over their fear".
I wonder if the kid is exerting her power knowing you and everyone else are bending over backwards to please her. She seems to be okay with your grandmother's dog unless they have to lock him up too...Maybe the girl should be seeing a therapist if the fear really is that real.
I don't get this "blaming the kid" thing several of y'all have been doing. According to the OP the kid has been 2-4 years old during these visits. 2 years old. Do you really think that scared 2 year old was "exerting her power"? Do you think that 2 year old had any idea people were "bending over backwards to please her"?? Kids--people--have all sorts of fears. Most aren't all that rational. Doesn't mean the fear isn't real.
It's really ridiculous to blame the kid. Especially when the OP has done nothing to explain her feelings to the other family--or her own mother. Plenty of people have no problem putting the dogs inside when guests are over--why should the little girl or family think this a big deal if the OP hasn't told them?
I don't get this "blaming the kid" thing several of y'all have been doing. According to the OP the kid has been 2-4 years old during these visits. 2 years old. Do you really think that scared 2 year old was "exerting her power"? Do you think that 2 year old had any idea people were "bending over backwards to please her"?? Kids--people--have all sorts of fears. Most aren't all that rational. Doesn't mean the fear isn't real.
?
You need to meet my daughter.
She knows EXACTLY what she's doing. EXACTLY.
I've never met a more devious or manipulative person in my life.
She's either going to do something great or become a super villain. Mark my words.
That being said, you are 100% correct about the op fixing this situation rather than blaming the kids/guests.
My mom was terrified of snakes and reptiles when my brother & I were growing up. But she always encouraged us to touch them when we had the opportunity. My mom can now say she has shared a home with countless lizards, 5ft pythons and tons of other snakes. my brother and I had reptiles as pets for years.
oh my god.. wont be visiting you hahaha, hate them.
Why haven't you told your mother to stop inviting her friends to your house. And, it doesn't even sound like they are actually her friends but the adult daughter and grandchildren of a friend.
I can not even imagine inviting the adult child & their children of one of my friends to a party at one of my children's homes. Let alone doing it multiple times over a two year period.
Talk to your mother and stop the madness! Call your mother today and tell her.
The thing is that once something has been ignored, it becomes harder to deal with... My own mother long ago came to live with me for a few months and had her sisters and friends in constantly, all smoked and I cant stand it.. this was long ago before the bans for smokers.. so my house looked like a saloon with plumes of smoke. and I could leave , go to my kitchen and do a full hand washing and no one missed me till they wanted tea or coffee... It wasnt my house anymore and I hated it but didnt know how to deal with it without offending.. its not easy either.. Being too nice sometimes means Mug..
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my brother and I had reptiles as pets for years.