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We are invited to a 90th birthday party celebration for someone who we recently met....she is a member of a social club we attend.....all members are invited. The invitation states "no gifts please". It's a casual gathering....appetizers and cake. I don't know why exactly I feel indecisive about whether to bring a small gift (flowers or candy)....I guess because I feel uncomfortable showing up with just a card....but I don't want to offend the celebrant if she really does not want gifts. What would you do?
A friend gave herself a big party for 90th and said "no gifts please"... I couldn't even go as I just came out of hip replacement and was not in great shape.
Then she had 95th big party, same scenerio and I went and a card only and guess
what, she passed a couple months later.
Like she planned her life and death and just about everything in between.
The point is "older people don't need anything and don't want to think about getting rid of more stuff".
I would say the SAME THING if I threw a party for myself or my daughter did.
A birthday card is appropriate. At 90, it isn't about gifts, it's the pleasure of your company on their birthday.
This. The lady doesn't need anything. She doesn't need the aggravation of dealing with unwanted gifts.
Your company, and your best wishes are the things that she wants the most. I imagine most of her friends have passed, and new friends are taking their place in her world.
If you really feel you need to give her a "gift" ask her out for lunch some day or call her up and see if she wants to go somewhere with you. In my experience getting out of the house would be greatly appreciated.
If the party is it someone's home, I would bring a hostess gift of a bottle of wine or flowers, plus a card. Otherwise, I would just go with the card.
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