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At any rate, they still don't get to dictate how I behave. Allowing them to decide how my life goes isn't what's best for either of us. And my kowtowing to their every wish and whim at any age isn't being a good mom. It's enabling them.
Sure, the mom in the OP needs to "tone it down" in her presence out of respect for her houseguest, who happens to be her daughter. I don't know many posters here who haven't acknowledged that about the mom in the OP.
But the OP herself is behaving like a child. Her protests aren't actually about the inappropriateness but more about her throwing a fit because she's not the center of attention anymore.
I agree.
Yeh... it would be nice for the mother to tone it down.. assuming she full out making out with the BF (we actually don't know). I don't think anyone posted arguing that her behavior is totally acceptable. But in the end, the mother's house.. mother's life... mother's decision.
Of course I would need My Husband too as you state but people do get re-married. There is nothing wrong with it.
There's a difference between finding companionship and finding a substitute parent for an adult child.
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Originally Posted by Penny4YourThoughts
And of course my son would say I would need My father but people do get re-married and step parents come into the picture to sit in in that role. Hence they're called Step Parents no matter the children's ages because that is what they are.
"Step parent" is usually just a title given to the new spouse of the widowed parent. But they are not actually filling a parental "role". Some adult children may come to accept someone their widowed parent married eventually as a parental figure just by virtue of being married to their biological parent, but seeking someone out for the purpose of filling a parental role is crazy to me.
Yes, exactly. Having a mother turn into this is very embarrassing. Last time I checked, it was considered a bad thing for a mother to neglect their child for a man.
Excect you're NOT a child. You are a grown ass woman. You need to act like it.
There's a difference between finding companionship and finding a substitute parent for an adult child.
You mean you cannot have it both ways? I better let my friends know who happily re-married
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"Step parent" is usually just a title given to the new spouse of the widowed parent.
Yes, but more directly, it is the title of the relationship between the new roles taking place. Step FATHER.
Quote:
But they are not actually filling a parental "role".
I am sure there are some who are not. There are bad parents everywhere
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Some adult children may come to accept someone their widowed parent married eventually as a parental figure just by virtue of being married to their biological parent, but seeking someone out for the purpose of filling a parental role is crazy to me.
You mean you cannot have it both ways? I better let my friends know who happily re-married
What?
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Originally Posted by Penny4YourThoughts
Yes, but more directly, it is the title of the relationship between the new roles taking place. Step FATHER.
I am sure there are some who are not. There are bad parents everywhere
Yes that is a possibility.
Most adults I know who have had a step parent added to their life do not conisder them to fill a parental role. That has nothing to do with anyone being a bad parent. They just don't want or need anyone to be their substitute parent. [CENTER]Save[/CENTER]
Of course I would need My Husband too as you state but people do get re-married. There is nothing wrong with it.
And of course my son would say I would need My father but people do get re-married and step parents come into the picture to sit in in that role. Hence they're called Step Parents no matter the children's ages because that is what they are.
To be honest, I wouldn't get involved with anyone my son didn't like. He's my son, I can give him that basic level of love and respect.
After all, I am his mother.
As I mentioned earlier, my children are 30 and 34, and I value their opinions on many things. But, unless they have valid reasons to object to the man (he is a felon, or abusive, or a drug addict, or something similar), it would be my decision and my decision alone who I date and who I marry. Just like it is their decision who they date and marry.
My son is #1 in my life. Doesn't matter if he's 6, 36, or 60. He's still my child and comes first.
I can understand your 6 year being first or equal to your spouse in your life. But, your 36 or 60 year old adult child comes before your spouse/SO in your life?
Hey my grandparents would smooch a lot. When I stayed overnight, I could hear them having sex. We all did! It's NORMAL. They were married for decades...good thing they still enjoyed each other. No, we didn't sit there with a bowl of popcorn and watch. You just rolled over and put a pillow over your ear. Same thing with my parents. They had sex, too. OMG! People have sex! Alert the media!
OTOH, true. In some parts of the world several generations live together in the same room. That could be awkward, but it's their culture.
I can understand your 6 year being first or equal to your spouse in your life. But, your 36 or 60 year old adult child comes before your spouse/SO in your life?
I haven't had a spouse in a long time. I'm happily single.
If any man I was dating was rude to or didn't like my adult son, he (the man) would be gone. I gave birth to my child and he is #1. Relationships come and go.
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