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Old 09-24-2019, 06:17 PM
 
Location: planet earth
8,620 posts, read 5,654,555 times
Reputation: 19645

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Quote:
Originally Posted by foundedjames View Post
I would really like if you could explain since I did that with my best intentions. I really wanted to protect her from all the gloom that's heading my way.
No comment. If you are that unaware, I wouldn't even know where to start.

Good luck.
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Old 09-24-2019, 06:25 PM
 
6,460 posts, read 3,983,103 times
Reputation: 17215
Quote:
Originally Posted by kokonutty View Post
Exact diagnosis, size, scope, staging are all factors necessary to make an informed opinion. Age is critical as are medical opinions; is there a reason you don't share that information here?
Because it's not the business of anyone here?


Most of the attitudes here are precisely the ones OP is getting from their family, and does not want. People are so adamant that if they don't agree with the decision someone else makes for their own life (or even death), they have to try to change the person's mind-- even if they don't, and never will, know that person and have absolutely no horses anywhere near the race. It's too bad people can't accept each other's decisions and personal life choices more.
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Old 09-24-2019, 06:35 PM
 
18,104 posts, read 15,683,109 times
Reputation: 26808
Ultimately it is no one else's decision, and if OP, who is an adult, has decided "no treatment, no way, no how," and he's fully informed and understands what the outcome will be by refusing treatment, that's his choice. He owns that choice and there's nothing to do or say. His body/his illness/his journey/his choice.
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Old 09-24-2019, 06:53 PM
 
7,135 posts, read 4,546,769 times
Reputation: 23337
Of course your family is not supportive. They love you, you are young and your cancer is highly treatable. A totally different story if you were 70 with stage 4 cancer. Your family and girlfriend are going to feel guilty forever that they couldn’t reason with you. You are committing suicide and need counseling. Totally different story when a 28 year old girl had advanced brain cancer and she moved to Oregon for assisted suicide.
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Old 09-24-2019, 07:37 PM
 
12,766 posts, read 18,384,540 times
Reputation: 8773
Quote:
Originally Posted by foundedjames View Post
Things are going to get bad. I would never want to put her through this. This way she's clueless and is free to carry on with her life without being shackled by someone else's cancer.
But maybe thats not what she wants

Granted i’m married but never in a million years would i leave my husband if he got sick ...
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Old 09-24-2019, 07:46 PM
 
Location: Portal to the Pacific
8,736 posts, read 8,672,864 times
Reputation: 13007
I don't think I would ever tell the girlfriend.. that would make your passing extra painful.. why not let her go completely.. let her move on completely and give her NO REASON TO LOOK BACK. If she finds out the truth she will have to morn for you in probably the same exact way that she would if she had been down this path with you all along. Have you not considered that?
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Old 09-24-2019, 07:54 PM
 
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
11,936 posts, read 13,114,080 times
Reputation: 27078
Quote:
Originally Posted by foundedjames View Post
If I'm a grown up to vote, drive and buy a house, I'm surely grown up enough to make decisions regarding my health without counseling.
You certainly aren't acting like a grown up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
First-time poster.


Resists all entreaties.


Does something unimaginably cruel to a loved one.
Yes, it is pretty much the hat trick of troll posting.

Is school out again?
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Old 09-24-2019, 08:03 PM
 
Location: Flyover Country
26,211 posts, read 19,529,215 times
Reputation: 21679
Quote:
Originally Posted by foundedjames View Post
I do not project my decision onto others. I'm glad you had treatment and that it was successful. Seriously, not being an hypocrite.

But let's not forget the millions of cases that don't have a happy ending like yours. People tend to hype the cases of cancer treatment that were successful, pushing aside all those that did exactly the same but passed away.
Why don't you want to fight? I think the same thing happened to Steve Jobs, he had a curable form of cancer like yours, but he at least opted for some strange "alternative therapy" that included lots of vitamins, sunshine and juicing. When he realized it wasn't working, it was too late.

I hope you come to your senses before its too late. Best of luck to you.
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Old 09-24-2019, 08:05 PM
 
Location: Portal to the Pacific
8,736 posts, read 8,672,864 times
Reputation: 13007
My husband says you should tell the girlfriend. Explain your decision and make it her choice to accept it or not. Respect and trust her ability to make up her own mind.
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Old 09-24-2019, 08:08 PM
 
11,025 posts, read 7,845,423 times
Reputation: 23702
Quote:
Originally Posted by foundedjames View Post
It might not be so easily treatable as many of you are saying. I'm simply not willing to take a risk. Once the side effects of treatment kick in, there's nothing you can do to take them back. You are already there.
You don't seem to have a very good understanding of the prognosis of the disease you claim to have.
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