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I had a friend many years ago that seemed to be irresistible to men. She was overweight, lazy, and not particularly attractive. She did have very large breasts. Even when she was out with her boyfriend, other men would flock around her like moths to a flame.
She was very much a spoiled princess. She refused to do anything for herself, like pump gas in her car. She would give her work to others in the office and then take credit for it. She had the "helpless female, dumb blonde" act down pat, and always got away with it. She was not mean, and was actually very personable, but so are a lot of people who don't have everyone fawning over them.
Location: Unlike most on CD, I'm not afraid to give my location: Milwaukee, WI.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RMD3819
My BIL is a spell caster, especially with women, including my wife (his sister).
He has a silver tongue and is a convincing pathological liar. My mother, then in her 80s, wasn't under his spell but explained it to me. She said when he talks you feel like you are the only one in the room. Another time she said when he speaks to you you feel like the sun is shining directly on your face.
He is a con man, mostly financial scams and to get women to support him. He has been a doctor, lawyer, and accountant in his schemes. He is on his seventh marriage. I could fill the forum with stories, including being arrested by the Secret Service.
I would love to hear these stories of which you speak...
ive met a couple in life that seem such awesome bs'ers that on one hand you are instantly skeptical...but on the other ...admire what salesman they are..
but these two were know it alls…….but ironically.....in their 30-40's and didn't have much...
I shy away from anyone that ….tries too hard to get too close...or endearing ...too quickly..
but the smooth bs coming from some....is just uncanny......probly many years of practice!!
again im very much a skeptic and have an antenna for USERS...….THEIR ARE GIVERS IN THIS world and takers/users and they can be psycopaths….. have not a care or clue what they do to others...negatively..
I would love to hear these stories of which you speak...
Oh boy....
-Put on a loan application he was an accountant for a catering company. In reality he was their dishwasher.
-While unemployed and living on my sofa he went to the mall jewelry store unknown to me, using my car and gas and claimed to be a doctor buying an engagement ring. The store ordered a $10,000 diamond from Israel. The day he left the jewelry store called my landline as he hadn't picked up the diamond ring. His response: "Oh, well".
-He was in Utah claiming to be a law professor and was building a $600K house with his girlfriend. There were pictures of them in front of the house under construction as well as the plans etc. It was all a scam. The police showed us the pictures.
-While on a cruise he fraudulently used a credit card from a woman he met on the ship. He was placed in the ship's jail cell. Betcha didn't know ships had jail cells. When they got to port in the US he was arrested by the Secret Service. The SS has jurisdiction for financial crimes committed by American citizens in international waters. Betcha didn't know that either.
-While he was with wife number five he appeared to be stable. They wanted to move near us so my wife drove them and a real estate agent who was personal friend around town looking at houses. They had applied for a mortgage. Total waste of time. A few days later the truth comes out. He is unemployed and the mortgage application was an attempt to scam the bank. His wife went along with the charade. His response: "They can't do anything to me (legal wise)".
That's just the highlights. I did not go into his seven wives, jails and psychiatric facilities, disappearances for YEARS without any contact.......
OP maybe she is very manipulative? If she can detect peoples vulnerabilities (some people have natural talent at that) she might know how to use those vulnerabilities against them, to control them, without their knowing she is doing it.
I've been under a couple of what I'd consider completely platonic spells with other women (I'm straight and married to a man). I can't really put my finger on it... each time it's been someone who was not more attractive than average, wasn't particularly athletic, wasn't particularly charming. I don't really know if those individuals had others under their spell, though, or if it was just some interesting chemistry between us. I am a big believer in things like pheromones and chemistry between people and I have always attributed it to that.
Charisma is often how mentally "off" people maintain a social circle. It's a gift they develop to compensate for other shortcomings. I have a minor gift for it, and for me it was definitely a survival skill that compensated for my severe undiagnosed ADD and an emotionally abusive parent. With me, I don't think it's a spell. I've just got a decent sense of humor and am pretty self-deprecating, and most of my friendships that have really meant something have lasted for decades.
Now, my mother is DEFINITELY someone who has this ability in spades. I was totally under her "spell" or whatever for 40 years. I thought she was sane and well-adjusted, when she is anything but. I"m still reprogramming myself 3 years later, and I notice she seems to have trouble maintaining her veneer. She has friends that have dropped her because they realized how much of her warmth was just an act. I don't know EXACTLY what happened, but I think it was a blow to her ego when I stepped away from our relationship and she started clinging to people and telling them how "unreasonable" I was (I wasn't, and functional people tend to recognize this), because when I encountered some of her friends, they said some very dismissive things about her and were very worried about me, and one who is my facebook friend is always posting messages about how strong and brave I am. Weirdly reassuring after being rejected by one's mother (I stepped away, but she'd basically told me to go to hell when I wouldn't play her game).
My mother is basically a svelter Ursula the Sea Witch if we're beating this metaphor to death, lol.
My mother was able to charm people also. Everyone thought she was wonderful, and would tell me how lucky I was to be her daughter. I was caught in her web for most of my life, but I finally wised up in my 40's. She lost several jobs for being mean to the customers. Her employers were usually shocked when her true self reared its ugly head.
I have several good friends who are charismatic, several are not what you would consider to be conventionally attractive, but they make you feel wonderful and comfortable to be around them. They are all educated and high achievers. Not a “spell”, or sexual attraction, but their charisma has served them well in their lives. Several politicians, musicians, and fundraising types, that I have met have this same charisma. Though not always used positively.
Some people blindly follow leaders that they find Charismatic. For example Jim Jone, as in Jonestown massacre.
I’m sure what is charismatic to one is not to all— as in the OP’s case of not being under the “spell.”
-Put on a loan application he was an accountant for a catering company. In reality he was their dishwasher.
...etc
Sounds just like my next older brother. Psychopath to the core. I could tell you more of similar stories.
Even when he was a small boy, grown women would comment on him wishing he would grow up so they could marry him.
When older, women would practically undress themselves around him.
Never could understand any of it.
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