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Well you didn't say when you plan on parting ways? Do you have a lease, are you stuck with her for the next 6 months or so? Is her name on the lease as well as yours?
IDK if I would say anything because these types will just lie to your face and say it must be some misunderstanding.
My concern would be does she stand outside your bedroom door when you're on your phone? If you get any mail at home concerning student loans, credit cards, etc. Is she trying to get a look at your finances, or going on your computer?
People who do what she did, also do the things I just mentioned. In other words you can trust her about as far as you can throw her. I would just plan on making other living arrangements and you don't tell her or anyone you have in common until you have a plan in place. You don't screw her over, you give a month's notice and no other details, or you just be vague and say you want to live alone(even if you're moving in with someone else).
I would let it go like your mom said, but consider what she did as giving you gift in a way, and this isn't someone you want in your life. My favorite Maya Angelou quote is "when people show themselves to you, believe them".
She has shown you exactly who she is, time to cut contact ASAP.
we are in a binding lease together for next couple of weeks. so i was thinking about telling her last day when we part ways. She has selective amnesia and will probably just lie about everything i said.
Well you didn't say when you plan on parting ways? Do you have a lease, are you stuck with her for the next 6 months or so? Is her name on the lease as well as yours?
IDK if I would say anything because these types will just lie to your face and say it must be some misunderstanding.
My concern would be does she stand outside your bedroom door when you're on your phone? If you get any mail at home concerning student loans, credit cards, etc. Is she trying to get a look at your finances, or going on your computer?
People who do what she did, also do the things I just mentioned. In other words you can trust her about as far as you can throw her. I would just plan on making other living arrangements and you don't tell her or anyone you have in common until you have a plan in place. You don't screw her over, you give a month's notice and no other details, or you just be vague and say you want to live alone(even if you're moving in with someone else).
I would let it go like your mom said, but consider what she did as giving you gift in a way, and this isn't someone you want in your life. My favorite Maya Angelou quote is "when people show themselves to you, believe them".
She has shown you exactly who she is, time to cut contact ASAP.
we only have a couple of weeks left before graduation. her name is on the lease, but our lease ends when i graduate. So i was thinking about saying it to her before we leave. i have lost something in my room and think she took it, but i have no proof. I became bitter from this experience and i feel like i was always nice and cordial with her despite all of this.
Just let it go and don't say anything to your roomie. Consider it a lesson learned about loyalty and personal betrayals, both your betrayal of your GF and your roomie's betrayal of you. If you ever end up having another roomie again learn to keep your mouth shut about your romantic relationships and other close friends. If the things you say about them are things you wouldn't want them to know you had said then that is a betrayal of their own loyalty and trust in you and the problems it generates will always come back around to you and bite you in the butt. You bring it on yourself by being disloyal. So be more discreet from now on.
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we only have a couple of weeks left before graduation. her name is on the lease, but our lease ends when i graduate. So i was thinking about saying it to her before we leave. i have lost something in my room and think she took it, but i have no proof. I became bitter from this experience and i feel like i was always nice and cordial with her despite all of this.
Suck it up and stay for the remaining weeks. If you confront her now, it may blow up on you into a huge deal, she seems to live for the drama. Everyone will hate you because she spreads malicious lies about you like that you have herpes or whatever.
On your last day, say your peace and leave.
Next time, give it more time to find out if the other person is sincere or a backstabber. I am sorry you have to go through that, college should be a fun time.
Suck it up and stay for the remaining weeks. If you confront her now, it may blow up on you into a huge deal, she seems to live for the drama. Everyone will hate you because she spreads malicious lies about you like that you have herpes or whatever.
On your last day, say your peace and leave.
Next time, give it more time to find out if the other person is sincere or a backstabber. I am sorry you have to go through that, college should be a fun time.
Some of my friends said if I do say something just go easy on her. I am thinking about just saying I feel that you have wronged me in a lot of ways in this program. I am glad I don't have to deal with you anymore take care.
we only have a couple of weeks left before graduation. her name is on the lease, but our lease ends when i graduate. So i was thinking about saying it to her before we leave. i have lost something in my room and think she took it, but i have no proof. I became bitter from this experience and i feel like i was always nice and cordial with her despite all of this.
Well that is good, and you might want to mention that item that is missing. She most likely did take it, which is why I asked about her snooping through your things.
Don't become bitter, but keep this in the back of your mind going forward, and use it as reminder when you find yourself in friendships and relationships.
But I would tell her at the end what you think of her and what she did. You will feel better and use this as a learning experience.
Move out and be done with her. I wouldn't recommend that you have it out with her, because to you it may just be a chat, to her, (she lies, remember?) it would be like: "I was scared for my life. I've never seen him so angry." I wouldn't put anything past a liar and a gossip, so watch yourself. I was going to suggest that you write a letter, but again, she'll probably share the "juicy tidbits" on social media. So I'm with your friends and mom, let it go.
Good points. She’s lied about other stuff, so she would be likely to lie about “the chat.”
Some of my friends said if I do say something just go easy on her. I am thinking about just saying I feel that you have wronged me in a lot of ways in this program. I am glad I don't have to deal with you anymore take care.
I know you want to have the last word here. But what are you trying to accomplish?
I know you want to have the last word here. But what are you trying to accomplish?
Usually when a person confronts another its to regain a sense of integrity and balance. Self respect shall we say. I would encourage the OP to follow the path of discussing the impact this persons actions had on HIS life. Might not do a dern thing to change that persons behavior, but like most seeds planted the person will KNOW that their actions now have consequences.
While its water over the bridge, It was at the time that the information came together to access the tru nature of this person that the "harm" done should have been discussed.
Ive said things off the cuff about some folks....and I'd have to own it and make amends. I am astounded that some give this "roomie" a free pass and let her go on stabbing folks...(figuratively speaking)
Usually when a person confronts another its to regain a sense of integrity and balance. Self respect shall we say. I would encourage the OP to follow the path of discussing the impact this persons actions had on HIS life. Might not do a dern thing to change that persons behavior, but like most seeds planted the person will KNOW that their actions now have consequences.
While its water over the bridge, It was at the time that the information came together to access the tru nature of this person that the "harm" done should have been discussed.
Ive said things off the cuff about some folks....and I'd have to own it and make amends. I am astounded that some give this "roomie" a free pass and let her go on stabbing folks...(figuratively speaking)
OP won’t gain anything except nastiness from roomie, and more fodder for her gossip mill. Sometimes you have to cut your losses.
But I think OP will talk to roomie. And, honestly, I hope I’m wrong.
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