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There is no truth in these situations, there are perceptions on both sides. The OP can't even decide if the friend is worthy of friendship or not, depending on any given time. On minute the "friend" is a friend and the other times she is a thief.
If someone has screwed me in a business or I felt they would steal from my home, I guarantee I wouldn't "forget" it and become friends with her again.
Well, you don't have c-PTSD do you?
Plus, I had forgiven her and I like to think the best of people. I was mistaken to do so this time, but I wouldn't change anything.
Plus, I had forgiven her and I like to think the best of people. I was mistaken to do so this time, but I wouldn't change anything.
I have PTSD, but that doesn't change anything.
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Plus, I had forgiven her and I like to think the best of people. I was mistaken to do so this time, but I wouldn't change anything.
The question is what to do next.
You do realize it is unlikely this woman will let you go without a fight.
She is going to do whatever she can to draw you back into the relationship. This includes becoming angry, laying down a guilt or bad mouthing you in front of others.
When this happened to me I found it very weird.
I'd never had a person deliberately ignore my requests to be left alone.
I too am non confrontational by nature and mistakenly thought after I said no a few times the person would take the hint.
But they kept at it. Kept trying to draw me back in but I set boundaries and kept them. I also was careful about not badmouthing the other person in public.
It has something to do with sometimes "forgetting" what people have done or the full extent of it.
In my case, I didn't "forget" that she had screwed me - I forgave her. What I did "forget" was all of the other stuff I knew about her. I would say that's a feature of both PTSD reactions and idealism. I wanted to trust her. I have a hard time thinking people are evil.
She has a problem right now with a commercial neighbor that she is venting about on FB and is saying she has no-one to talk to about it. She has not tried to contact me so she seems to have understood that I have backed away.
She has a problem right now with a commercial neighbor that she is venting about on FB and is saying she has no-one to talk to about it. She has not tried to contact me so she seems to have understood that I have backed away.
She is venting on FB and posting she has no one to talk to about it.
She has a problem right now with a commercial neighbor that she is venting about on FB and is saying she has no-one to talk to about it. She has not tried to contact me so she seems to have understood that I have backed away.
1. Do NOT feel sorry for her lack of people to talk with. You do not have to fill the void she created by her own behaviors. You cannot fix her by being her friend. If she has a legitimate beef with a commercial neighbor, she can consult a professional for advice.
2. She has not yet recontacted you, so be GLAD OF THAT and make sure that “not yet” becomes simply “not”—forever.
If you keep forgetting what bad things people do to you, then print big reminders to yourself and keep them visible all around your home. This person is just plain old bad news.
If she was a decent person, she might take what you say to her and learn from it and even change her ways, but it sounds like she's an awful person that would never change, so let her be.
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