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Hi all
I am currently living with my parents. My mom and dad are very supportive, they don't let me pay for anything although I do help out sometimes, with grocery shopping or if they ever need something etc.
The thing is I'm 25 years old (female) and I am really beginning to feel like living with my parents is taking away my personal space and sometimes I really need to be alone, but then I can't cause the apartment is very small and I have a small bedroom.
Sometimes my mom and dad wakes up 5.00 / 6.00 o'clock in the morning which is too early for me, and I wake up because of the noises. Sometimes I'm low on energy because I didn't get a full night sleep. It's not their fault, it's their apartment so I can't really dictate when they should wake up - but it's really just those small things that are beginning to irritate me
Other than that, my parents are very nice and sweet and I love them <3
The thing is, I haven't moved out because I like the freedom I have now, no rent, no bills etc. I can save all my money and go out, buy the clothes I want, have a lot more money to spend than if I had an apartment.
I am so confused and IDK what to do. Should I keep living with my parents and save up or just move out but then my economy will be tight.
Although the thought of having my own space is heaven to me, and I am really into the idea... But the thought of having a strict economy just ruins it.
(In Europe the apartments are really expensive) so there is no option to move into a low rent apartment.
What should I do?
The little things that irritate you about sharing a small apartment with your parents should encourage you to move up and out on your own--either with or without roommates. No confusion necessary. Set a deadline, save towards your goal, find a roommate if necessary, and move out. Come home to visit often, but live elsewhere like the grown woman who you are.
Making the childhood home so comfortable (i.e., requiring no rent, few if any contributions to the household, allowing the adult child to come and go as he or she pleases, etc.) that a young adult declines to fly the nest because she/he risks the normal discomfort that comes along as one emerges as a fully functional human being is a mistake, in my opinion.
Last edited by Formerly Known As Twenty; 01-03-2020 at 09:39 PM..
I agree w/Reebo, move out and the sooner the better. Your parents may even be glad that you finally made the leap so to speak. Good luck to you either way.
Personally, I never lived at home after age 18 other than the first two summers cause I was still in junior college, but lived off campus during the school year.
Back in my day... my parents informed us we would be moving out at 18 and that we better start working at 16 to pay for said apartment. I see it is different now with kids over age 18. I know some that are over 25 years old and still haven't applied for a driver's license.
I LOVED having my own place, doing whatever I wanted, when I wanted. Will always be a great memory. And yes, I was working full time, too.
OP - get a place with a couple girlfriends. Will be so much fun!
How is burdening the op’s parents with supporting her/him treating mankind decently? If doing what’s best for you results in crappy results for others, is that treating mankind decently? That just sounds selfish to me.
Living on your own and paying your own way DOES mean you’re an adult. That’s how you figure out your priorities and values. If someone else is paying your way, you’re never really free-there are always strings attached of one sort or another.
My statement: "last tid bit of adulthood- re: treating mankind decently"
in response to your comment: You’re a grown-*ss woman. You should be paying your own bills.
So with that lets both agree such a comment is neither treating a person decently nor is it necessary. Firstly not all “20 somethings” should or shouldn’t allow a poster decide how they need to be by xyz. Each person grows, accepts certain tasks at their own pace. Your calling them names doesn’t encourage. Its rather demeaning actually. So if that was your goal. Bravo, you succeeded. But if you were trying to be reasonable and supportive, that mark was missed.
The thing is, I haven't moved out because I like the freedom I have now, no rent, no bills etc. I can save all my money and go out, buy the clothes I want, have a lot more money to spend than if I had an apartment.
Should I keep living with my parents and save up or just move out but then my economy will be tight.
But the thought of having a strict economy just ruins it.
(In Europe the apartments are really expensive) so there is no option to move into a low rent apartment.
What should I do?
"Freedom" is a tricky word.
Anyway, as some posters have mentioned, priorities and budgeting.
Once you decide that living independently in your own space is the priority, for whatever reason, then you have to learn budgeting.
Or you could do it the other way around: calculate the budget and then re-examine your priority.
Either way, a quantity of saving can get you started, but unless we are talking about several million, it is not enough to maintain month-to-month expenses over time.
Revenue - expenses = net income
If you don't know what those terms mean, learn them, open an excel program or take the back of an envelop, and do the math.
To some, generating a positive number at the end of that equation provides an enormous sense of freedom. To others, it is meaningless.
So, as other posters have mentioned, there is a host of other considerations, but the basic budget equation provides a rather accurate measure of pragmatic reality.
My statement: "last tid bit of adulthood- re: treating mankind decently"
in response to your comment: You’re a grown-*ss woman. You should be paying your own bills.
So with that lets both agree such a comment is neither treating a person decently nor is it necessary. Firstly not all “20 somethings” should or shouldn’t allow a poster decide how they need to be by xyz. Each person grows, accepts certain tasks at their own pace. Your calling them names doesn’t encourage. Its rather demeaning actually. So if that was your goal. Bravo, you succeeded. But if you were trying to be reasonable and supportive, that mark was missed.
No, let’s both NOT agree.
You are EXTREMELY sensitive if you think that’s demeaning. But that explains a lot. Carry on.
My daughter moved out for college overseas. Her HS friends stayed here or went to other EU countries. One rents a room with use of kitchen, use of bathroom and use of laundry machine. Cost 400 euro a month in us dollars 446. The landlady and student cook each 3x times a week and split groceries bill. On sunday is eat outside of house.
Other friend rents a small house together with other student rent + utilities total 990 euro.There is severe shortage of affordable student housing and of affordable rent houses/flats for young adults wanting to live independently, recently divorced needful of moving out etc.
All 3 are good with finances and live within budgets.They do remember the carefree days of their teen years and going fun shopping. DD now talks about cost of laundry pods......
The last year of HS usually the teen schoolkids save money get a part-time job stocking grocery shelves.
Usually when moving out into student living if it is bare unfurnished, they take furniture from home or buy at Ikea. Also it usual to shop at home in mom's kitchen. When DD was in 3rd year HS and the idea was study other city she allready had checked out my kitchen cabinets, drawers see what she could use to take with her.Since she was born I saved up part of the child money we in EU get for the kids until age 18. This amount is different for each EU country. I saved 1/3 of it and she still has it. As she is in USA for her college study in 3rd and 4th year they are allowed to live off campus in private rentals. If it is bare she can use that money for it. Students also learn from each other. One of DD her hobbies is makeup she does makeup for other girls and likes giving advice on colors techniques etc. and saving money making the most of beauty items.
She very much likes independent living. She budgets on her smart phone she grew up seeing me do budget in little book with pen. I used to tell her stories from my college days. Before leaving for study I had to work 3 years office job and I saved part of it. At 21 at that time one was official adult and I could sign my own papers for college. These days most places 18 is adult. And moving out starting ones own life independent from parents is part of being an adult. She was home for winterbreak Xmas holiday and is now back in USA.
My statement: "last tid bit of adulthood- re: treating mankind decently"
in response to your comment: You’re a grown-*ss woman. You should be paying your own bills.
So with that lets both agree such a comment is neither treating a person decently nor is it necessary. Firstly not all “20 somethings” should or shouldn’t allow a poster decide how they need to be by xyz. Each person grows, accepts certain tasks at their own pace. Your calling them names doesn’t encourage. Its rather demeaning actually. So if that was your goal. Bravo, you succeeded. But if you were trying to be reasonable and supportive, that mark was missed.
Based on the OP’s other posts, it appears she has a full-time job and also does some vlogging/blogging and other freelance activities in her off time. In short, it seems like she has the financial tools needed to be able to go off on her own. If the OP were in school, working part-time, or otherwise going through some health issue/etc., sure, staying at home makes sense. However, once you’ve started a full-time career, it seems to be as good a time as any to focus on trying to make a plan to move out.
I wouldn't even consider 25 to be "grown *ss". Most people in their twenties still have no idea what they're doing. Things these days are so expensive that most are still living at home.
First I would like to say to those who don't think I have a job, or that I am a "child" living at home: I do have a job - I have my own social media career / blogger, published a book in my country (it even made the bestseller list), and I do seminars every month that pays good - so yes I can support myself and NO I am not a child. I'm a grown up woman, who is independent financially (and soon) moving out.
I am even saving up money to (move out) and working on getting my own apartment this year - the reason I made this thread is because I wanted to hear other peoples opinion, people that don't know me. Tomorrow I am going to look at an apartment, and if I am lucky enough I will be out in August 2020 (max)
I got some good advice from here, for example I realized I need to move out, I can't live at my parents apartment anymore, I'm starting now to make a budget and try to "pretend" I've moved out. I will look at apartments everywhere in my country, and the date for moving is set to be 1. August 2020.
Thank you all for your answers
But wow I'm surprised over some (few) negative / mean replies there is here...
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and saving money making the most of beauty items.
