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If I were you, I would stay out of the mess. As the Step-mother, whatever you do will eventually come back to bite you. Either your husband will be angry because you got in the middle of "his" family problems, or SD and BM will begin to use you as a pawn in their games. I would reply to the text from BM that they need to work out their issue with John, and that you will no longer be accepting their texts or calls.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy
I don't know. To me, it's just simply saying "If you want this stuff, you know where it is. Come and get it." Why pay postage for SD's dramatic exit? I wouldn't.
Although, I think OP should continue to ignore BM, as she has been doing. And let dad/husband handle it any way he sees fit.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Parnassia
Yep!!! You want to remain above this garbage not roll around in it, right?
I agree with the above posts.
Seems we have two sides, you should have made a poll. In my younger days I was told I was a pushover and I was. I had to learn not to get sucked into games, run over, or used. However, I do think you are rolling around in the trash in this relationship based on your responses. It seems as if you are fully sucked into the game. You need to detach a little.
There's no reason to be in communication with the BM. If you can't ignore her messages or control your emotions when seeing her messages, then just block her or ask her politely to contact DH. If BM and SD are emotionally unstable, then you should be the rock. Do not reflect their emotions, let them simply bounce off you to the ground.
I would text SD that you saved TB, HP, BMD, GCJ, and MU. Let her know that you will hold onto TB, HP, BMD, GCJ, and MU until she can come and get them. And that's it.
Here's an example of post text requests.
BM or SD texts:
"Can you please send the stuff?" or
"You are mean, send me the stuff" or
"Stop stealing my stuff, give it back" or
"I know are wearing my BMD, stop it and send it back" or even
"Without my emotional support TB, I can't function and you are to blame."
Your texts:
" " (silence) or
" " (continuing on with your life) or even
" " (maybe taking a yoga or meditation class)
I wouldn't get sucked into throwing a fit, but then sending her stuff anyway. This TB thing will help set the tone of your relationship moving forward. Do not let her throw a fit, storm out, and then demand that you send her things to her. This will not be the end of it, SD will be in your life for a long time, don't set the tone that you will be a pushover. You do need to take a chill pill though, because some people love seeing others riled up.
As the Step-mother, whatever you do will eventually come back to bite you. Either your husband will be angry because you got in the middle of "his" family problems, or SD and BM will begin to use you as a pawn in their games.
I would reply to the text from BM that they need to work out their issue with John, and that you will no longer be accepting their texts or calls.
If I were you, I would stay out of the mess. As the Step-mother, whatever you do will eventually come back to bite you. Either your husband will be angry because you got in the middle of "his" family problems, or SD and BM will begin to use you as a pawn in their games. I would reply to the text from BM that they need to work out their issue with John, and that you will no longer be accepting their texts or calls.
Yep. That's it.
The OP shouldn't have to deal with it other than redirecting the drama to the appropriate department.
"We had to pay $100 cancellation fee for the plane ticket you didn't use and we got no refund on the plane ticket. So if you want your stuff that you left behind you'll have to send us the money for the mailing costs, plus extra money to compensate for our time and effort and trouble that you've put us through. We think $100 should do the trick and after we receive your payment we'll send the stuff to you."
I think meeting is just a bad idea. Postage will probably be less than $10. It's money well spent to be done with it.
This is the only possible answer. Throw them in a mailer envelope and mail it cheapest way. Put everybody on ignore on your cell phone. It's not your drama.
This is the only possible answer. Throw them in a mailer envelope and mail it cheapest way. Put everybody on ignore on your cell phone. It's not your drama.
Exactly ... any form of "they should come to us" is just looking for more conflict.
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